Hearth
by SpeakingThroughWrittenWords
Summary: Oneshots in the Hearth AU. Chapter Seventeen: Maddox does some really weird things. Vash does not always approve. These sentences state the obvious.
1. Yet Chapter One At The Same Time

_This one takes place right before Comedy of Errors, but reading Comedy of Errors first probably will make this make a bit more sense.

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_

**Chapter Zero**

He had never meant to come back to Hearth. Francis liked to think he was beyond the town of his youth. Arthur was quite right in saying they should never near it as it was a trap waiting to pull them back in again.

The place had changed slightly. Just slightly. It still looked too much like Hearth. How had he missed his train exit? A turn of very bad luck, if he must have said so himself. Which he really had to, because there was no one else who would say this for him. His Matthew might. He ought to call him, but he preferred to let the other travel unfettered by his constant worries. Matthew was a good boy, he knew what he was doing.

Most of the time. Which was enough, really.

But the trouble started when Francis decided he could stay in town for a bite to eat. Marcus used to run that wonderful restaurant... or he could pop in on Gilbert or Antonio. Last time he spoke with Antonio was months ago though and Gilbert was not the person to drop in on for quick food before running for it.

He was hungry though. So why not stop at the Store? That would not take long and he would just walk to the city. He did not care how long it would take, he would do it.

_Never get stuck in Hearth, you will never leave._

"_Fair enough, I coined the phrase_," the French left his mouth and into the cold air. He wondered who worked in the Store now, since Fritz had left and neither of his sons had been interested in the job...

"Ah, Tino! Long time no see!"

Tino stood up from where he was slightly bent behind the counter, staring at him in disbelief. "Francis? Ha! When did you come back?"

"Don't say that," Francis waved it off, leaning against the counter. He spoke quieter, as if the town would not hear him that way. "It's more like dropping by. Goodness, you've grown!"

"It's been years," Tino reminded him happily. He seemed slightly hesitant for a moment, but then returned to his previous demeanor. "Are you going to say hello to Antonio and Gilbert? I'm certain they'll be glad to see you... though Antonio might be a bit busy."

"Busy? Antonio?" Francis questioned, pretending to be shocked. "However could that happen?"

"Not my place to say," Tino walked around the counter. "He might tell you, if you stuck around a little."

Francis laughed, it trailing off very quickly. "Ah, I'll keep that in mind. Oh, but Tino! I must say you do look wonderful!"

Blond hair. Francis liked blond hair. He was a firm believer in the words 'blonds have more fun'. And Tino had grown up nicely... Francis was a vocal appreciator of nice things. Why not? Nice things did like to know that they were being appreciated.

"Thanks! Uh..." Francis stroked Tino's hair back.

Which is when all hell broke loose. Or the fact he felt someone grab him by the shoulder. The grip was a little painful and Francis' hand dropped back to his side as he looked toward the person behind him.

"Berwald! Long time no see!"

"H'nds 'ff m' w'fe."

_H'nds.... that must be hands. Hands off. Well, do not really have to translate the rest of that, do I?_

"Berwald, it's okay. And you need to stop calling me that," Tino pleaded. Berwald did not seem very happy with that, but let go of his shoulder all the same.

"You've grown up so much as well!" Francis tried to say cheerily, massaging his shoulder.

"You've grown too!" Tino protested. "You've even grown a beard!"

"If y' c'll th't a beard..." Berwald grumbled, looking away.

"I see you're more talkative than you used to be," Francis commented to the taller one (deciding to ignore whatever it was he had said) before returning his attentions to the man who was not going to try and crush his bones. "Do you like it?"

"Yes, it suits you!" Tino responded. The fact Tino was not bothered was promising. The fact Tino was not bothered by Berwald was just strange. He remembered a day when the taller one would always frighten him. Most people, actually.

"Glad to see the two of you have finally gotten together," Francis remarked. That finally affected Tino, who blushed. Berwald's expression, as always, did not change. Though he did seem less likely to try and manhandle him again.

Unfortunately it made Francis open his big mouth.

"If you two ever think about opening your sights to include a threesome–"

Which is when Berwald started throwing things at him.

Francis did not know how in Hearth Tino managed to calm Berwald down so quickly. All he knew was that hiding behind the counter meant he did not know which direction Berwald might be coming from. He could really use a mirror.

Tino's head peeked over the counter at him. "Can you hand me the phone?"

"Certainly," Francis handed it up.

"Thanks."

_Anything to keep my skin intact,_ Francis sighed, wondering how he could have made that social error. He usually did so well when it came to suggestions. Then again, he _was_ in Hearth.

"V'sh?"

"Berwald, maybe I should talk..."

Francis tried not to snicker. He succeeded. Remembering Berwald throwing things at him made it very easy. Francis tried to discern what it was that Berwald was saying into the phone, but could not make out hide nor hair of it. He doubted the person on the other end could either.

"I'm sorry Francis, but Berwald doesn't like those sort of jokes..."

_Berwald apparently can tell when it was not really a joke,_ Francis kept to himself.

"Well, I'm certain we can get this sorted out!"

The door opened.

"Berwald, would you care to elaborate on the reason for which you called me?"

"Hey Vash," Tino seemed to respond with a sense of relief. Francis decided to risk standing up to see the situation.

The man named Vash looked at him, then looked at Berwald and Tino, then looked at the destroyed merchandise. Francis could tell exactly what was going through the boy's head.

"_I_ didn't do it!" Francis protested.

"You are under arrest," he said, pulling out some handcuffs. "You can either make this easy on the both of us or, if difficult, I can change my tactics to accommodate your issues."

Francis could see a gun, so decided Vash's way was probably the best way to go. "Bye Tino!" he gave a wave, before being cuffed. Tino opened his mouth to say something, but Berwald walked into the back room and with a concerned look, followed after.

_Yes, be concerned for _him._ Not the one being falsely accused._

"I will have Berwald tally the amount of the destroyed merchandise," Vash was informing him. Francis coughed.

"But I did not do it!"

"I do not want to hear what it was you really did, as it is bound to be worse," Vash grumbled. Did not sound like he was in a good mood. Francis decided to try and play it safe.

"I don't have much money on me."

"And Hearth does not have a bank."

"I knew that."

And Francis knew where this was going. Quickly he tried to think of any excuse which would not be construed as threatening or bribing, but yet somehow lean to his captor's more sensitive side.

Not that this Vash appeared to have a more sensitive side.

"But monsieur!" Francis begged as he stepped into the cell. "I beg thee to reconsider!"

The policeman sighed, then frowned. "The law is the law, Frenchman." He locked the cell. "You said you didn't have the money on you."

"Not as of now~" Francis tried to be reassuring.

"No."

"Please?" Francis tried his most pitiful face. He could not be stuck in jail here!

"You don't plead with the law. You plead with the justice when they interpret it."

"And you seem a little young to be part of the law," Francis mentioned. He had no idea why he said it. That certainly was not going to score him any points with Vash. And he was right. The younger man ignored him.

His life could not get any worse. He was stuck in Hearth. And Francis knew this time he was unlikely to get out.

* * *

_Francis does not like Hearth because there are a limited number of people that it is all right to hit on. The moral of this story? Do not hit on Berwald's man. Ever. Tino might be forgiving, but Berwald definitely is not. And he is the one you have to worry about._

_This will be filled with all of the mismatched things in my Hearth AU which do not fit in Comedy of Errors or in the sequel which I am planning. Do not expect updates, just be happy when they come.  
_


	2. Actually, It Is The Sibling Rule

_This chapter takes place before Comedy of Errors. Really, this could be read without even knowing about Comedy of Errors as it is rather pointless. Just me trying to get back into my humour writing. Thank Dancing Feather for this chapter. A part of it is obviously based on my 'Fruit' drabble from 'The World, Piece By Piece'.

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_

**Brothers Are_ Meant_ to Make You Want to Kill Yourself**

"I had a dream I vas Prussia."

Sometimes the mornings would start like this. Where nothing made sense. Not that much which came from Gilbert's mouth made sense. Ludwig wondered why he would bother trying to convince his brother what came from his mouth was stupid. The man never got it.

The real question was why the hell would Gilbert show up at his house for breakfast. He should probably stop feeding him.

"You can't be a country," he responded. Gilbert could not be much of anything, but this was stretching it more than usual.

"Vell... it vas like being a country in my own body!" Gilbert shrugged as he sat down at the table. Ludwig glared down at the wurst he was cooking.

"Dat is stupid. Plus, Prussia no longer exists. You can dank Ivan's country for dat."

Gilbert hit his hands on the table. "I knew I hated dat bastard for some reason!"

"No. No you didn't."

Gilbert snorted. "I don't make fun of you vhen you have dreams about becoming a giant sausage–"

"Ve vere never to talk about dat again!" Ludwig exclaimed. Gilbert laughed.

And Ludwig had lost his appetite.

"You remember you hafe an Alfred appointment, don't you?" Ludwig relished the sound of Gilbert's squeak of horror as the reminder dawned on him. It meant part of the day when he could just relax because there was no work, and because there was no Gilbert.

Then Ludwig remembered Feliciano wanted him to help him rearrange his entire living room. Okay, so not so relaxing.

"Eat up," Ludwig said as he gave Gilbert a plate. Gilbert sighed as if the world was against him.

Ludwig knew what that was like and could very honestly say that Gilbert had no idea what it was like to have the world against him.

"But vhen I vas Prussia–"

Ludwig tuned him out and started eating. For once he skipped the wurst.

* * *

Finally Ludwig could relax. God, he loved Feliciano, but sometimes he just wanted to lock himself up in his house to get away from the other. Not that locking the door ever worked, both Vargas' seemed to be expert locksmiths. In the illegal way.

"Ludwig!"

Ludwig groaned, not bothering to get up from his armchair. He was going to sit in this chair and read his manual, goddammit. Gilbert could unlock the door with the key Ludwig never should have given him in the first place if he wanted in so badly.

"Bruder!"

Whatever Ludwig had been expecting, it had not been an apple thrown at his face. Ludwig spluttered as his gloved hands rose up to block the expected contact.

"Vhat de–"

"Eat it!" Gilbert exclaimed as he climbed through the window.

"Get out of my house!"

A small scuffled ensued, ending up with Gilbert taking Ludwig's seat and Ludwig on the ground.

"Vhere'd de apple go?" Gilbert questioned, looking around. Ludwig rose to his feet, the perfect picture of anger.

"Gilbert!"

Ludwig was quite proud of the small squeak he made escape the other. He threw Gilbert out of his house, closed and locked his window before settling himself back in his chair. He winced and pulled the apple out from under him. Grumbling, Ludwig set it aside and promptly tried to forget about it.

* * *

And breakfast.

"Ludwig!"

"Vh–"

And the applesauce left the ladle and nailed him straight in the face.

"_**Gilbert! Get out of my house!**_"

The saddest thing was Ludwig thought Gilbert would stop doing this. But apparently Alfred always made a convincing argument about dieting.

* * *

_In a _very _illegal way. Picking locks is one of the few things Lovino actually got to teach Feliciano. Unfortunately, Feliciano is better at it than he is now. Lovino regrets everything._

_I recommend reading the next three chapters if you want to be kept up to date – they are three things that happen between Comedy of Errors and Much Ado About Everything._


	3. So Very Impossible

_This one obviously takes place after CoE. Only a few days, in fact.

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_

**Mission Impossible:**

**Get Away With Dating Ivan's Sister**

Katyusha was beautiful. She was absolutely gorgeous. She was sweet and polite and fun-loving and everything that was perfect. It made up for the fact the rest of her family was absolutely insane.

Sort of.

**Mission: Plan the Date**

Before that was confirming that there would even be a date. A lucky run in at the Vargas' restaurant had allowed them both to express their desire of such a thing. Angus had felt like one hundred pounds had fallen off of his shoulders.

Replaced by two hundred. Ivan barely tolerated him being Katyusha's friend, but dating her? Angus had been waiting for Ivan to show up and threaten him or, not even bothering with that, kill him outright. But as it never happened Angus was faced with his next problem. The fact he was actually going to be dating Kat. She was not the first girl he had ever had a crush on, nor was he really that shy when it came to women. Most of his nerves came from her family.

And partly because he kept fearing that she might just think he liked her for her body and not the rest of her as well. Not that she did not have a wonderful figure that Angus found himself fantasizing about (against his will... but what straight man couldn't?), but he really liked her for the fact she was so sweet. She did not treat people differently, she treated everyone with respect and kindness.

Of course, Katyusha did not seem to notice her wonderful figure. Or her wonderful personality. Really, she was an absolute dream.

As this was reality, it was countered by the nightmare of her family. Angus tried not to think about it.

"How 'bout a movie at my house?" he suggested. It seemed too little, but Kat tended to appreciate things just as they were. "I'll make dinner."

"I would like that." Kat smiled. "Is Monday okay with you?"

Angus nodded quickly. "Monday is excellent. Monday's perfect."

**Mission: Completed**

**Mission: Prepare for the Date**

This step was probably the easiest of them all. Though Angus agonized about his movie selection, went over to Roy's house to see if he had anything better and ended up borrowing one of _Erin's_ movies of all people (not that Erin watched many movies) and then was stuck wondering what he should make for dinner.

Something warm. It really was too cold this time of year. Angus did not know how anyone could stand it.

But once he had all of this prepared (plus house cleaned and everything looking perfect) Angus realized that all there was to do now was to wait for Monday (which was interrupted by a call to Feliciano's house about some evil cat that would not let him out of the house) and actually have the date with Kat.

**Mission: Completed**

**Mission: Have the Date**

Uh oh.

Despite his survival instincts tell him otherwise, Angus went to pick Katyusha up from her house. She answered the door, bundled up in her jacket, smiling, and absolutely gorgeous.

Angus did not care if Ivan killed him now. This was worth it.

"Hallo Angus."

"Ah... er... g'afternoon, Kat." She giggled, taking the step out of her doorway and closing it behind her. "Shall we?"

"Yes." She wrapped her arms around his left upper arm as they walked out into the snow.

"I had to get a stray cat on Sunday."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, wouldn't let Feliciano out of his house. Or Ludwig in... I think he was on his last nerves."

"Poor Feliciano... Is cat all right?"

"She's fine. Little brat is making a mess out of my spare room."

"Oh no!"

"Nah, that's what it's for. I'm just wonderin' what I should do with her."

"You're not keeping her?"

"I can't keep every stray I pick up. My house would be filled with to the brim with them by now. Plus, Ace would go insane. Usually I take a ride with Yao and Muhammad 'to town and drop them off at the shelter."

"Shelter?"

"Don't say it like that, m'gal! A no-kill shelter. I would never have the heart to drop 'em off otherwise."

"Of course! I'm sorry..."

"Nah, don't be."

She let go of his arm as he rummaged through his pockets, pulling out his keys and unlocking the door. He heard her call out his name and he turned around just as a snowball hit his arm.

"We cannae le' ye 'ave the lassie, cuz!" Roy called out as Brian handed him another snowball.

"You're kiddin' me." Angus stared at his two cousins. Not for long, however. Manner dictated he take Katyusha out of the cold, but his honor dictated that he beat up Roy for hitting him with a snowball.

"Ye'll mess it up," Brian agreed with Roy, right before he was nailed in the face with a snowball. Angus turned to see an apologetic Kat.

"I... figured we beat them before we go in." She shrugged.

"Bu' we're on yer side!" Roy called, making certain Brian was his shield.

"Sounds like a plan," Angus agreed, picking up some snow.

The snowball fight went on for half of an hour before Maddox and Alfred managed to distract their uncles with a catapulting device (_those two were sort of insane_) so Angus and Kat finally managed to escape inside.

Ace's ears perked up from where she lay in the front hallway. Kat knelt down to pet the dingo of whom simply decided things were not that interesting and went back to sleep.

"I'm sorry 'bout that," Angus said apologetically, trying very hard not to watch the water droplets fall from Kat's hair. She turned her head toward him, a bright smile on her face.

"Not at all! It was fun!"

Finally feeling relaxed, Angus went to the kitchen to make some hot chocolate. Out of their coats, the two sat on the couch and watched the movie he had painstakingly picked out. She leaned up against him and he put his arm around her shoulders without a second thought.

By dinner his mind should have been conflicted between thinking that he had just been overreacting before, nothing was going to go wrong and as nothing had gone wrong yet, something was about to happen. As it was, Angus was feeling too good to think beyond the second one, so when he heard Ace's teeth snap together a few times and a loud knock on the door it took him a few moments to react.

"I'll be right back," he promised Kat as he went to the front door, opening it to see the last person he ever wanted to see ever. Ever.

"Vhere is Kat?" Ivan demanded. Angus found himself floundering for words.

"What?" _Probably not the smartest thing to say_, he thought in retrospect as Ivan glowered at him. "Why do you ask?" _Even stupider, Angus. Nice going._

It was right when he heard Ace let out a short bark and the scamper of nails against the ground. Angus turned right as the cat darted past him, attacking Ivan's leg.

Everything was quiet except for the sound of hissing as she dug her claws into Ivan's left pant leg. Ivan stared down at the cat, expression changed to one of slight surprise.

"I'm sorry Angus! I heard scratching, I forgot cat was in spare room!" Kat apologized though tears, breaking out into a small smile as she saw Ivan. "What brings you here, brother?"

"Cat." It took Angus a moment to realize Ivan was not talking about his sister, but was looking back down at the feline who no longer was trying to destroy his leg. Rather, she was now simply attached to it. Ivan stared down at the cat for a while longer before looking back at her. "Ve're going."

"Why?" Kat asked, aghast.

"We're just having dinner." Whether that would help his case, Angus was not certain. The look on Ivan's face said 'no'.

"'Cause I don't vant you here," Ivan responded to her question, putting a hand on Kat's shoulder. "Now–"

"Ivan! Leave me alone!"

Ivan did not respond immediately. Neither did Angus. Kat's outburst caused them both to loose the ability to talk.

"I am having dinner with Angus," she continued, tears flowing down her cheeks. "We are finishing eating, I am kissing him, and then I'm going home! Please stop stopping me!"

"But..." Ivan coughed out. "But you... vhu..."

Kat burst into sobs and buried her face into Angus' chest. Angus unconsciously wrapped his arms around her. "_Shh._.. it's all right..." Still somewhat shocked, he looked back over toward Ivan, who now looked depressed.

"Don't... don't cry, Katty," Ivan said haltingly. "I'll go. Don't cry..." Katyusha tried to say something, but all that came out was more sobs.

"It's all right Kat, Ivan's not angry..." Angus looked up at the taller man. _You better not be angry..._ Ivan gave a quick nod as if scared to not be so. "See? It's okay."

"Have good time!" Ivan squeaked (_Squeaked? Seriously?_) before he left. Angus reached out and shut the door, warm air once more encircling them. He was not certain what just happened, but the native Australian was beginning to think it might be good. 'Might be', because it could not be good while Kat was crying.

"Kat...?" he asked nervously. She brought her head up from him, looked at him for a moment before she blushed.

"I meant surprise you," she murmured, looking down.

"What?" Angus asked, but he could not say anything more because she kissed him.

They went to finish their dinner. Angus was pretty certain that asking her for another date was the right thing to do. And she accepted.

The worst thing about all of it was that it took them so long to get to here.

**Mission: Success? Success!  


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**

_Yeah, poor Feliciano. Because he was not talking about Ludwig at all, Kat. You silly girl._

_Yes, Angus' owns a dingo. The family is weird like that. His father sent it to him and Angus freaked out as somehow Ace got all the way through customs without being stopped, put in quarantine, or anything. It was a once in a lifetime experience, the echidna was caught when that trick was tried a year later. Angus' dad does a lot of illegal things. Because of that Angus has learned to be a law abiding citizen and not go to jail._

_My computer does not think echidna is a word. Fail._

_The main reason I wrote this was to show that Ivan finally has given in, his older sister has finally stood up to him, and that Ivan now owns a cat. Yes, Ivan took the cat with him. A very bitchy cat._

_This was also supposed to be sweeter, but I choked on the sugar._


	4. And You Thought Hearth Was Bad

_This chapter starts on the Thurs/Wednesday after Comedy of Errors finishes.

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_

**And This Is Why They Live In Hearth And Not The City**

His head hurt. Yong Soo groaned, eyes blinking several times before he realized that the reason he could not see was because the room was dark. Finally he started to realize what had happened.

_I should have listened to Sadiq... now _that's_ not something anyone thinks often._

Not that Yong Soo often knew what people thought. The mind-reading binoculars he had invented had failed somehow. Which reminded him, that was a project worth getting back to.

"_Either go home or pretend to be a druggie," she said._

"_I'll be a druggie," Yong Soo said happily. She groaned. "If you really wanted me to go home, you would have flipped me over again or something, right?"_

"_They call him Drain," she continued, head gesturing to her right. Yong Soo looked over to see the group in the alleyway. He assumed the one called 'Drain' was the one that looked like he was in charge. He assumed he was in charge because he was freaking tall. Tall like Ivan or Berwald tall. But much thinner than either of them._

"_He's like a twig."_

"_A twig that could break you in half. He's like you, his looks are deceiving."_

"_Right. What else do I do? Long...?"_

Long... Yong Soo managed to sit up, no help of his right arm. Yeah, the bullet probably was not helping that. He hoped she was okay.

And Pipe had forgotten to take the money from him. Yong Soo felt through the bills. This would very much pay for that painting. Single score, that made this trip worth it. Well, worth it as long as he could get out of here. He reached around the inside of the crate, trying to find an opening.

"_Pipe'll have what you need."_

"_Pipe? Ha! Is there a Sink too?" Drain looked annoyed, but shrugged it off. Yong Soo thought it through. To make a convincing druggie... "Uh, dude?" That sounded like Alfred. Though he was a doctor and dealt with drugs. So yes, that was accurate._

Actually, he had had no idea what a druggie acted like. He knew what drunks acted like, though... maybe he should have tried that.

"Hello! This is rather uncomfortable!" he called out. No one answered. At least they had taken the broken bottle of chloroform. He would prefer to be conscious, shot, and trapped in a box than unconscious, shot, and trapped in a box. While conscious he could do things. Being unconscious was boring.

"_You idiot? Why did you knock him out?" Long asked, pulling him up by the arm._

"_I didn't mean to," Yong Soo said honestly. "But I figured you wanted the evidence...?" He handed over the package of white powder. Long's eyes widened as she took it._

"_Idiot. I do not need _evidence_. I need to get in."_

"_No, I think you needed the evidence." With her adverse reaction to that, he decided not to hand over the money. She might become even more upset._

"_Who is in charge?"_

"_You are. At least, of me."_

"_...right."_

Alfred would not believe this.

Which is when it hit him. Alfred. Where was Alfred? He had been looking for him in the first place. Where was Alfred?

Probably better of than he was...

* * *

_**The previous day...**_

"...which is when I told Ivan that he was a lot more creepier now than he was before!"

Yong Soo and Gilbert laughed, the latter whacking Alfred's arm. Thankfully his arm kept steady, because it was attached to his hands which was right now attached to the wheel of the truck he was driving. If his arm did not stay steady, it could be easily promised this scene would have been a disaster.

"I can't imagine Ivan with a cat," Yong Soo said.

"I can't imagine dat Russian keeping anyding alife!" Gilbert corrected, still chuckling.

"Bet it's going to be dead within the week?" Yong Soo asked, pulling out his wallet.

"It'll be dead before we get back to Hearth!" Gilbert crowed. "How much?"

"Hey, hey... No betting," Alfred said, causing Yong Soo to groan and Gilbert to snort. "Don't you start complaining! You can't bet, you don't have the money," he reminded Yong Soo, who groaned again, pouting in the passenger's seat. "And _you _took my bet," he told Gilbert, who grinned.

"Not my fault if you're so slow!"

"Why're you here anyway?" Alfred asked Gilbert.

"'Cause I hafe stuff to do," Gilbert shrugged. "Like people do."

"Suit yourself."

The drive into the city did not take too long. Just the better part of a day if he did not stop on the way. Alfred was regretting not stopping however, because he was not certain if he wanted either Gilbert or Yong Soo driving on the way back and he easily got sick of doing the speed limit.

Oh well.

It was late afternoon by the time they arrived, Gilbert asking to be let out on some random block. Yong Soo coughed out very obvious words of randomness, which started Alfred snickering. Gilbert pretended to ignore them.

"See you tomorrow then?" Alfred asked as Gilbert hopped out on to the sidewalk.

"You better!" Gilbert exclaimed. "Leafe me in dis town, Alfred ant I promise dat–"

"Drive away before he starts ranting!" Yong Soo whispered. Alfred, knowing full well Gilbert could start ranting like his younger brother (just usually about more interesting things) decided that Yong Soo's idea was a great one and simply shut the door, gave Gilbert a wave, and drove off to the warehouses.

Sadiq had been quite happy to see him, though more than surprised to see Yong Soo. Alfred thought about explaining it.

They both had (directly or indirectly) been involved in messing up Eduard's perfect life. In particular, a painting. Alfred broke the frame that Gupta was going to buy to replace the one that was broken and Yong Soo had broken everything else. Alfred had already paid Berwald and Tino for the damages. Yong Soo had yet to raise the money to make up for the very expensive painting.

Eduard could pay for it to be fixed himself. He probably already had. But Yong Soo was going to have to pay for the accident. And as Alfred was not in that much need financially, paying Yong Soo off to keep him company was fine with him!

Kiku had not been that happy, but then again Kiku was _strange_. Kiku did not like Yong Soo. Alfred was not exactly sure why and after months of unsuccessful prodding had decided it was none of his business.

Except for that last tumble off subject, Alfred could have said the rest of it to explain why Yong Soo was here, but then he remembered Sadiq was really unlikely to care _why_ Yong Soo was here, just more that he _was_.

Fair enough.

"When'll I have the pleasure of seeing Yao and Muhammad again?" Sadiq asked, looking over the list. Yong Soo shrugged. Alfred thought about it.

"The break is healing well. I'd say the cast will be off in three weeks. So not next time, but the trip afterward I'll be out of your hair."

No need saying why Muhammad was not around. Deciding to take his vacation days the same period of time Yao was not working? Definitely not subtle. At least to anyone but Yao who missed every sign.

"Good."

Alfred was not certain how Sadiq read any of that. His hat came down so far on his face Alfred was not certain if the man really had eyes. Still, he seemed okay with whatever happened, because he nodded, jamming the clipboard under his arm.

"Yer load will be ready by the 'morrow," Sadiq said, watching as Yong Soo wandered off into the building. "Where does he think he's going?"

"He doesn't," Alfred responded. Nevertheless, he took the few steps over to drag Yong Soo out of the warehouse and back out front.

"Y'both staying at the Agency?" At Alfred's nod, Sadiq frowned. "Be careful."

"Careful? Of the pretty women who will be staying there?" Yong Soo asked hopefully. Alfred laughed, but Sadiq did not seem amused. Which was beyond him, it was a pretty accurate description of the place. Hearth was small, this place was huge. Who knew why?

"Of the gang fights happening in the area." Sadiq folded his arms across his chest. Alfred nearly laughed again.

"Psh, gangs." Alfred rolled his eyes. "Not really worried, Sadiq."

"Imagine if a gang tried messing with us!" Yong Soo put his fists out in front of him. "They'd never know what hit them!"

Alfred was inclined to agree and said as much. Sadiq was not impressed, but then again Alfred had never really seen Sadiq impressed except when coming up with insults about Heracles.

"Yeah, I could really imagine hitting some thugs with you."

"As long as it's not hitting on some thugs with me!"

"Okay, Kiku was right, you're weird."

"Compared to Kiku?"

Sadiq shooed them off before they distracted his workers further.

* * *

Alfred had been right earlier during the drive. The Agency was absolutely wonderful. He had always thought that big brother and Muhammad were not thinking right in taking this job, which usually seemed too boring for him to ever consider, but getting to stay here the nights they had to wait in the city had to be the perfect setup.

And going to a bar which did not include Elizaveta leering at you was pretty cool too. So was getting to talk to people that you did not know, which was not something that happened very often in Hearth.

"What's your name?" Yong Soo asked the Vietnamese looking woman sitting on the stool next to him.

"Don't even try to hit on me," she rolled her eyes, propping her head in her hand.

"Nah, he's not hitting on you," Alfred leaned over the bar from where he was sitting on Yong Soo's other side before Yong Soo could tell him to butt out. "If I started talking to you, _that _would be hitting on you. But Yong Soo's just talking. He doesn't know how to hit on someone."

"I invented hitting on people!" Yong Soo protested.

The woman's slim eyebrows shot up. "Yong Soo? Korean then."

"On some planet... yeah. My name's Alfred," Alfred offered a big grin.

"I'm telling Kiku~" Yong Soo whispered loudly.

"That I was... talking to someone?" Alfred asked, for some reason confused. In Yong Soo's opinion Kiku had chosen a very strange person to crush on. To be more specific, he had chosen the one person to crush on which meant that a relationship would go nowhere. Or maybe that was what Kiku wanted? Wow, he sure fooled everyone!

"Mary Jane," she offered, sliding around on her stool so that Yong Soo had a very wonderful view of the back of her head.

"Dude, I can tell that's not your name."

"And I do not care."

"I think it's a beautiful name!" Yong Soo piped up, elbowing Alfred in the gut. Finally she turned around to look at the both of them, eyes still narrowed.

"Is he for real?" Mary Jane asked Alfred. Alfred was grinning for some reason.

"Yes, I am very much for real!" Yong Soo made certain to say before Alfred could say something else stupid.

"Good." She nodded. "Because that tells me I should take my drink and sit over there. _T__ạm biệt_." With that she up and left, leaving Yong Soo to sigh into his drink.

"Tough luck man."

"I was doing fine until you interrupted!"

"Actually, I think you just picked a difficult chick, but put the blame wherever you want."

Yong Soo grumbled into his drink, but decided picking a fight with Alfred would be rather stupid since he was the one paying him to help out. Plus, Mary Jane's empty seat was quickly filled by another beautiful woman.

This city was definitely wonderful.

* * *

"What are you doing?" Yong Soo asked, completely wasted out of his mind. Not that Alfred could tell the difference other than the man could not stand upright for long while drunk.

"I promised to call mom." Alfred rolled his eyes with his statement. Made him feel like such a child. He really needed to move out, but not like it would make much of a difference. Arthur would still make these requests and in living in Hearth he would still have to deal with the consequences if he did not follow them. It sucked.

"I need to... call... big brother..."

"Sounds too 1984," Alfred let out a whistle, falling onto his back on the other bed. The phone being picked up snapped him back into paying attention. "Mom?"

"Alfred? How was the drive?"

"Long and interesting," Alfred said, before rethinking it. "Interesting because I had Yong Soo and Gilbert to talk to, not because anything really happened."

"You certain about that?" Ah, _now_ it was probably suspicious because he clarified. Just wonderful.

"I just called like you asked me to," Alfred stopped himself from rolling his eyes just to look over at the unconscious Yong Soo. Well, as long as he was not awake to hear... "Night mom, love you."

He could hear Arthur chuckle. "I love you. Don't get in too much trouble, okay?"

"Mom! I've done this a few times without messing up! Honestly!"

"All right," Arthur hesitated, the sound of something loud in the background obviously distracting him. "I have to go, I think Maddox is on the roof."

"Nothing new." Alfred grinned. "G'night."

"Good night Alfred."

Alfred dropped his cell phone on the pillow next to him. Staring at the ceiling for a few minutes, Alfred could have sworn he had just blinked when he heard his cell phone going off. With a groan, he picked it back up. "'ello?" he said quietly.

"Alfred, we've got trouble."

It was Sadiq and for a moment that did not make any sense. "How'd you get my number?" Alfred asked, sitting up.

"You put it in when y'filled in the checklist," Sadiq responded. "But that's not the problem. The truck's gone."

"The... truck?" Alfred swore, putting on his shoes. "How?"

"I_ told_ you, gang activity is getting insane lately. I can only afford so much security over the wares."

"Shit. What am I supposed to do?"

"I called the police. I guess until they find the truck you're gonna have to sit tight."

He could not sit tight. Yao was going to kill him. Then Arthur would kill Yao. Then Yong Soo would kill Arthur and Roy and Brian would kill Yong Soo and then four people would be dead, Roy and Brian would be in jail, and Vash would be pissed. None of that sounded awesome.

"Where are you?" Alfred asked. Sadiq hesitated. "Well?"

"I'm not helping you do anything rash," Sadiq said firmly. This time Alfred did roll his eyes.

"I can't just sit around and wait for the authorities to take forever about it. This isn't Hearth." This was not Hearth where Vash barely ever slept if something had not been resolved.

"I know."

"Then I'm going to have to get the truck myself."

Sadiq laughed for a few moments before choking off. "You're serious? Damn... I still can't help you. I wasn't there when it happened an' I don't know much about the situation."

"You knew enough to warn me about it," Alfred reminded. Sadiq coughed.

"Anyone would know enough to warn about it! Did'ja ask anyone else?" Alfred grumbled in response. He had not taken it very seriously, so why would he have mention it? "Thought so."

"Who can I talk to?" Sadiq stayed quiet. "Sadiq, _who can I talk to_?"

"Heracles."

Alfred burst out into quiet laughter, only allowing himself to get louder as he left the room. "Heracles? You serious, man?"

"Look, neither he or the people that go to that god forsaken library ever have anything to worry about. Doesn't take a genius to guess he has some sort of deal going on with the troublemakers in the area."

And as ludicrous as it sounded, Heracles was just strange enough to be capable of it. Alfred ground out a thanks and left the hotel.

* * *

"Alfred?"

Yong Soo stretched out, blinking into the darkness. Fumbling for the light he turned it on to see what he had thought he had seen earlier even though it was too dark to see anything. Alfred was gone. Yong Soo got up and checked, making certain that Alfred had not shrunk or something. Hey, anything could happen!

With a slight frown Yong Soo got dressed and returned down to the bar. Had Alfred come back up? He had thought so, but maybe Alfred had gone back down.

The bar was still almost as filled as it had been earlier. Wondering whether today was a special day, or whatever reason people could possibly have for still being up this late, Yong Soo took a quick look around for Alfred. Well, not so quick. And he did not find Alfred. Surprisingly, he saw Mary Jane. And considering how she still had a drink in her hand Yong Soo took it to himself that he would have to step in.

"You should probably stop drinking now," he said. Mary and the man she was sitting with looked back at him.

"I drink what I want when I want. Ignore him," she rested her hand on the other man's chest before she put her arm around him. "Now what I was saying..."

"You trying to take a picture?" Yong Soo asked, leaning over the back of the couch. The man looked surprised and Mary turned her head and glared at him.

"I like taking pictures of attractive men," she slurred, waving her cell phone in front of her. Yong Soo reached forward to grab it.

"I'll take the picture for you!" he said kindly.

"Want me to get rid of him, Jane?"

"Hell no, I'll do it."

She gave the man a smile before standing up and gripping Yong Soo's arm in hand. He was surprised by her steady and firm grip. She seemed surprised for a second as well, but the alcohol easily seemed to make her forget. At least, Yong Soo thought so. He thought that until she dragged him over to one of the other walls.

"Will you fuck off?" she hissed at him, dark hair framing her face. "I'm busy!"

"You don't seem very drunk," he observed, pulling her to his side. Mary began to say something, but he took the picture before she had opened her mouth.

"That's _my_ phone!"

"Yep! Here you go!" Yong Soo smiled happily, giving it back to her. She glared at him before turning her attention back to her phone. She stared at it for a moment, then looked back up at him.

"You're... very photogenic," she commented, staring at the picture.

"Couldn't you tell?" Yong Soo asked, a little hurt by the incredulous tone in her voice.

"No." She shoved her hands into his chest, pushing him back against the wall. "Now leave me alone."

"I got a picture of him too," Yong Soo said, slightly cowed by the ferocity of her words. She paused and looked back down at her phone. "You wanted the picture of him, but I honestly don't think he looks nice at all. He would ruin a picture of you, so he can be in one all on his lonesome."

It seemed like a good idea to him. Mary was much too beautiful and the man she had been sitting with looked... well, he looked like one of those gang bosses in some of those Hollywood movies. She was definitely wasting her time with him, she could do much better.

"When did you take my phone?" she asked slowly, looking at him quizzically. Yong Soo thought about it.

"When you stood up."

"Look." With that she bent over slightly, grabbing something from under the lining of her dress. Yong Soo knew he should look away, but he ended up looking at the curve of her leg anyway. She held up a badge and it took a moment for Yong Soo to begin to think of what it was. "Agent Long Phan. I'm _busy_. Get it?"

"Sort of," Yong Soo said honestly, rubbing the back of his neck. Now that her dress was back over her leg he could look away and he noticed as another man began talking to the man Long had been hitting on. "Is that guy really a bad guy? Ooh! Can I help?"

She stared at him for a few moments before moving once more, putting her badge back where she had taken it from. "You _are _for real..."

"We established that earlier." Yong Soo blinked.

"Then why have you _not _got the message?" Long asked, turning around to search the crowd. "Where'd he go?"

"Oh, he left when some other guy showed up." Yong Soo shrugged. Long stared at him, turned and began walking away. "Wait, Long!" he reached forward, catching her by the shoulder. Which turned out to be either a really big mistake or the best thing he had ever done in his life.

Long turned around, punching him in the face and flipping him on to his back. Yong Soo caught her elbow and she ended up on top of him.

"Wow," he said. Long punched him in the face again.

Okay, mistake.

"Ow," he rephrased. She got off of him. "You'd get along with Vash." Long did not bother to respond, walking off. Yong Soo got up and followed after. Long glared back at him once more, but did not say anything.

And it was only after the man called Pipe shot Long, caught him, and had thrown him in the crate with the drugs had Yong Soo even considered maybe Long really meant that she had not wanted him to come along.

* * *

_Totally part one of two. Yong Soo and Alfred are very capable of getting in trouble on their own. Kiku's real reasoning 'Don't go with Yong Soo because you'll both blow up the city or something'. But Kiku is a lot more tactful than either, so he did not say that._


	5. Alfred Is Confused

**Where The Korean Gets The Cash, The Bad Guys, And The Girl**

_**Meanwhile...**_

"Hey, _Vati._"

The man, who's health had taken a turn for the worse last week, did not respond. Gilbert cleared his throat, sitting down next to the hospital bed.

"I triet to make Ludwig come, I really did. He vas just being an idiot. Stubborn... you know how Ludwig is. I don't know vhy he's like dis vith you. You'fe never done anyding vrong."

This was too depressing of a subject for him to talk about with someone who was in a coma. Gilbert decided to change gears and talk about something else.

"Dings hafe been goin' good. Got some new members in town... Francis came back. Stayin' against 'is own vill, but stayin' vith me for now. He brought dat son of his... Matthew. Adopted, of course. Francis has never actually shacket up vith a real voman, don't be ridiculous."

Gilbert rambled on and on. Everything he thought his father would want to know and more, things that would always have his father laughing and responding and asking questions. For hours and hours he would talk, until his voice was hoarse and beyond.

"Good times, eh Fritz?"

Gilbert wiped the tears from his face.

* * *

"Heracles! I know it's two o'clock in the morning, but I really need you to open this door! We need to talk! I can promise you that this is important and has nothing to do with Sadiq! Well, sort of. It sort of has to do with Sadiq, but he's not here! Heracles?"

Five minutes of pounding on the door finally yielded results. Heracles opened the door slowly. Like everything else he did it was slow. Alfred could not understand how anyone could live at that speed. Sure it was two in the morning, but Heracles looked as awake as he ever was. Which was never much.

"Can I help you?" Heracles asked. Whether it was because he had not heard him before or because he was hoping Alfred would change his reason for being here Alfred was not certain.

Fortunately, Alfred could think of the perfect incentive to get Heracles moving. It was sort of the inverse incentive he could use on Sadiq. Blame the other one.

"Sadiq got the truck stolen." It worked. At the sound of the other's name Heracles' eyes narrowed. Then he nodded, probably able to imagine the Turk being at fault for anything. "He thinks it was nicked by one of the gangs that has been acting up in this area."

"In this area?" Heracles questioned and Alfred rethought it.

"You know, the area near the warehouses. Same district as your library."

"Oh." Heracles blinked a few times. "That would be... Jared's, I think."

"Jared?" Alfred asked. "Good, you can show me where to go." Though Heracles did not seem very keen on coming, Alfred grabbed him by the arm and pulled him out of the house, steering him towards the Library.

"I can't say I advise this," Heracles told him, rubbing at the back of his neck, looking a bit sorry about the entire situation. Of course, he was not likely to be as sorry as Alfred was going to be if he did not get the truck back, so Alfred had to ignore it.

"You and Sadiq both." Alfred inwardly apologized to both of them. That certainly got Heracles moving and would likely give Sadiq a very big headache the next time the both of them saw each other. Using their hatred to his own ends would make him feel guilty, but Alfred had some bigger fish to fry.

Or a bigger automobile to drive. Or something like that.

"From here..." Heracles pointed to the left of the entrance. "You go straight down that way until you reach the fork in the road with only two ways to go. Take the left and find the first alleyway on your right which has the trashcans in the mouth of the way. Good luck."

"Wait, you aren't coming?" Alfred asked, trying not to panic. "What do I do then?"

"Tell Jared that you're a friend of mine," Heracles shrugged. "They'll give you back your truck."

"_You_ tell Jared I'm a friend of yours," Alfred argued. "I don't wanna look like I'm making it up."

"Why would you make it up?" Heracles was confused. Alfred wondered if he really was that slow. He had his Uncle Erin would probably get right along.

"Why would anyone make anything up? To survive, stupid." Heracles stayed quiet as he thought about the situation. Alfred let out a groan, decided not to wait for Heracles to come to whatever conclusion he would arrive at, and pulled the man along once more. "Sometimes I wonder whether you're really slow or that's just an act you put on." Like Maddox. Was Maddox really emotionless or was he just the best actor known to mankind?

"What?"

"Exactly."

Alfred was beginning to think that there was little point to bringing Heracles along. It might have taken him a while longer to find this Jared's place, but as the door was already opened when they got there Alfred figured that they were not alone on this trail.

Which was pretty cool. As long as they were on his side, of course. Otherwise it would be the anti-cool. Which, despite the English language, is not hot.

"Huh." Heracles did not seem phased by the situation. Alfred took a few tentative steps in.

"Who are you." It did not sound like a question, but as she had a gun pointed at him he decided to pretend it was.

"Alfred Jones. Sorry for interrupting your... house breaking or whatever." He grinned over right as he realized she looked somewhat familiar. But not really much. Then again, most Asian strangers looked alike.

Kiku would so _not_ be proud of him.

She lowered the gun. "You're Yong Soo's friend."

_Yong Soo, buddy, you are missing out on a lot. And the woman _does_ remember you. Lucky._

"Guilty as charged!"

"Hello Long," Heracles said as he stepped beside Alfred. Long looked annoyed once more.

"Oh. Hello Heracles."

"I take it Jared is that unconscious person over there," Alfred pointed over to the person he was pointing out. Pointedly. This was not good. At this rate he might as well say so much for getting the truck back. But he would never give up! For the reason that giving up would sort of be pointless at this point. There are a lot of points in this sentence. "I sort of needed Herc to talk to him."

"Don't call me Herc..."

"I actually needed to speak with him. He passed out," Long placed her handgun back in the holster strapped to her leg. "Do you recognize this man?" She pulled out her cell phone showing the screen to them.

"Nope, sorry."

"That... is Jaakob," Heracles noted. Long moved between them and the door. Heracles looked rather put out.

"You're going to show me where I can find him," she announced.

"But I need him to get the truck back!" Alfred protested, grabbing Heracles' shoulder.

"Don't I have a say?" Heracles asked. It was a good question.

"Since we're dealing with the same people... we can help each other out," Alfred suggested. Long let out a groan.

"Last person I let do that got caught by them. No way."

"Did the last person you let do that have the strength to pick up the said truck?"

"Actually, my say involves me going home," Heracles informed them. "Can I go home please?"

Alfred and Long shook their hands on the deal though and ignored him.

* * *

Yong Soo began to hear voices. They came from outside of the crate he was trapped in, so it was okay. Being as bored as he was he started listening to them. He had also managed to locate a few holes in the crate, though the only thing he could do with them was press his eyes up to them and hope to see something.

Which he did not. At least not until a light went on in the room.

"_Where's the next shipment?"_

It came to his mind that Long would like to know what was going on here. Yong Soo finally remembered his cell phone and searched his pockets for it. There was no reception here, but as he had power he had the ability to record this. He set it up and went to searching the crate. There was a lot of drugs and he kept that in mind just in case he wanted to get high in the near future. Next he went to inspecting his pockets.

All of that money he just got...

One of Maddox's firecrackers...

One of Kiku's flathead screwdrivers...

One of Yao's collection of acupuncture needles...

One of Gilbert's lighters...

A lighter and a firecracker. Yong Soo went back over to hear if the people were still there. He could hear the talking, but by this point it was far enough away. He jammed his phone back in his pocket and set the firecracker in the corner.

Yong Soo's lack of foresight included the fact that not only did that side of the crate catch fire and fall apart, but the drugs did as well. He was comfortably high when he knocked out the two gang members and hid in the rafters.

* * *

Alfred was much more willing to do what Long wanted when she mentioned what had happened to his friend. That and showed him her gun again. As much as Long had expected this job to be difficult, to have plenty of hitches, this could not have been right.

"That's not tight enough..."

"What do you know?"

"He's a doctor, Long."

She let Alfred fix the bandage on her shoulder when they had the time to pause. Honestly, tonight was not supposed to go this way. She should have already had some of the major names in the drug ring and returned to her station so as to have the men arrested. No such luck.

"I don't see why I'm here," Heracles said. Long was inclined to think that Heracles never knew why he did whatever he did, but she kept that to herself.

"That's Yao's truck!" Alfred hissed out, nearly moving toward it.

"Please don't be an idiot!" Long pleaded despite herself. Alfred did stop though, making her lapse slightly worth it.

"I'm not an idiot. I just need the truck."

"And Yong Soo?" _Please don't tell me he forgot about him. Please don't tell me everyone here is __absolutely insane. Please don't–_

"Oh yeah."

_Fuck you Alfred Jones_.

"If my first, albeit _failed_, contact was supposed to be doing anything tonight... what are the chances one of these guys will go over to his place and find out we're on to them?"

She did not know why she was asking either of them. And she knew the chances were high, but...

"He went to Jared's?"

Long punched him in the face. Alfred stayed put, though he brought a hand up to his face to rub at his nose.

"Okay, I deserved that."

"I'll get the truck," Heracles offered as he turned and left, leaving both of them to stare at him. Long would have pulled him back except she knew better than to stop Heracles when he actually started to do something. The man did not lie and always did what he said he was going to. So though it looked like he was walking away he was actually going to get this Alfred's truck. How? She was not even going to venture a guess.

The both turned their attention back to looking over near the truck. Heracles talked with them for a bit before some of the men took a few crates out of the back and Heracles drove off with the truck.

"You're kidding me," both witnesses said in unison.

She struggled to think of a plan, but Long finally came up with something the both of them could accomplish. At least, that was the case until the men Heracles spoke with all keeled over one by one.

Long knew she would need a few months of respite after this. Her superiors would understand once they read her report.

* * *

Alfred was okay with doing as Long said. This was what she did for a living, after all. She would know best. Then again Alfred was big into improvisation. Every single cops show he had ever said practically required that. Alfred was really good with improvising. He was also pretty good with heroics. With Yong Soo in danger he would rescue him.

Then again, he had not begun to think that Yong Soo did not need his help. Especially as he almost was struck by a projectile acupuncture needle.

"What the hell are you doing?" he hissed. Yong Soo stopped, staring at him with a dashing smile on his– oh _whoa_ no._ Dashing?_ Alfred found himself staring.

"Alfred?" Long called as quietly as she could. In that instant Yong Soo was no longer paying attention to him, but moved over to Long.

"Hello there! Alfred. Long..." He took Long's hand and kissed it. She went bright red and tried to punch him in the face, but he had turned his head away to look at Alfred. "Miss me?"

"Dude!" Alfred stared, startled into words as he recognized the scent. "You are _high_."

"What?" Long asked. Long was certainly intelligent, he could tell, but she certainly missed things.

"Inhale," Alfred pointed at his nose. She sniffed, covering her nose and mouth shortly afterward.

"Hell!"

"This does not explain why everyone in this place is unconscious, but I don't care man," Alfred nearly patted him on the shoulder, but withdrew his hand, not trusting himself to touch him. "You, my friend, are a ninja. A Korean ninja. If we fused together we could totally be Doctor McNinja."

"No." Long glared at him. "No, you wouldn't."

"Not that it would matter," Yong Soo waggled his finger in front of Alfred before pulling out his cell phone and tossing it to Long. She scrambled, managing to get a grip on it before it fell from her fingers. "The name of everyone here, beautiful."

"Bu... whu..." Long spluttered. Alfred rubbed the back of his neck, trying his hardest not to look at Yong Soo.

"And photographic evidence. It's what you needed, right?"

Long punched him in the face. Which might not have succeeded if Alfred had not punched him in the back of the head. Yong Soo slumped to the ground. Alfred managed to look Long in the eye.

"I just..."

"He... um..."

"Totally high."

Long nodded. "Yes. It was for his own safety."

For his own safety. "Totally." Alfred knew he was probably as flushed as Long. He tugged at his collar. On the ground, unconscious, Yong Soo looked like he usually did. Which was good. And no one was going to believe either of them if they mentioned 'strong personality' and 'Yong Soo' in a single sentence.

They were taken to the station and Alfred knew he was feeling the effects of exhaustion because, thinking back on it, he could not tell what had just happened.

* * *

"Vhat took you so long?" Gilbert asked. Alfred looked back over toward the truck and then at Yong Soo. Alfred looked like he had not gotten any sleep, but not the type of no sleep gained when having a good time. Yong Soo looked as if he was suffering from a hang over. Gilbert almost wished he had seen the both of them failing at the bar.

"The police report," Alfred said. Gilbert blinked.

"Police report?" he snickered. "I can see dat. I'll drife."

Alfred did not complain. Gilbert really wanted the details now.

"Yong Soo!"

The strange feminine voice brought Yong Soo to a complete halt and the three of them turned around to see some Asian chick (definitely smoking hot) running over. Gilbert let a drawn whistle.

"Dis a final slap?" he asked Yong Soo. Yong Soo had been looking hopeful for a moment, but then suddenly looked concerned.

"But I was awesome," Yong Soo protested. Alfred coughed, though when Gilbert looked at him he was not looking at either of them.

"Ah..." the woman looked between the other two, giving Gilbert a bare glance. "I wanted to thank you, I guess."

"Oh!" Yong Soo suddenly perked up. "It was nothing, glad I could help!"

Gilbert doubted it very highly. He doubted it right up to the point where the woman kissed Yong Soo right on the lips. Yong Soo looked absolutely clueless. Gilbert was gaping. Alfred coughed.

"Do not tell me you want one too." Her dark eyes stared over toward Alfred. Alfred shook his head frantically.

"Uh... no thanks. I'm gay. Yeah, very gay."

She burst out laughing.

"Vhat is going on?" Gilbert demanded. She turned and started walking away, a wave back at them without looking back. "I'm serious. Vhat just happenet?"

Alfred opened his mouth, closed his mouth, then looked back at Yong Soo. "She wouldn't have kissed you if you mentioned all that money."

"Yes should would have," Yong Soo retorted. "I'm just irresistible like that."

"And loaded with enough money to pay off your debt to Eduard."

"Can't forget that!"

Alfred and Yong Soo high-fived each other and went to the truck, Alfred mentioning something about whether Yong Soo had managed to get someone's number or not.

"Vhat de hell?" Gilbert shouted after them.

He had missed out on something big. That was not fair.

* * *

_If you do not understand the 'Jared's' reference, then good for you. I hate those commercials with a passion and would not recommend learning anything about them._

_I do not own Doctor McNinja. Sometimes I wish I did._

_Depressing part with Gilbert at the beginning? I know no one actually seemed to be curious as to why he had come with, but since it is sort of important in my mind I had to put it in. I am so sorry everyone, I think I have spent too long writing 'Discovering' and 'Recovering'. I will do my best to bring more humour back to the world of Hearth and have the depressing parts only to accentuate the humour later on. But to explain, Fritz is Gilbert and Ludwig's father. Gilbert absolutely adores him. Ludwig has his issues with him. The family has some (read: a lot of) problems. Like people do._


	6. This Is How They Began

_This takes place way before Comedy of Errors, where our beloved bad friends trio are troublesome teens. The first couple scenes have been written a little differently than I usually write things. Not in one person's POV. Hope you enjoy it anyway._

* * *

**History Of A Garden**

It all started when Antonio decided he wanted to plant a garden.

"It would be wonderful!" he announced. "We can have flowers, and vegetables, and tomatoes!" It was not just for him, but Antonio decided he did not need to say that. Besides, he really wanted tomatoes. And also this was something which would possible get Francis outside again. If his friend helped him plant a garden, then he would get out of the house.

Gilbert knew what Antonio was trying to do and was all for it, even if planting a garden was not something he was very interested in. "Sounds like a vay to pass de time, right Fran?" he shoved at the other boy's shoulder.

Francis shrugged. "I guess."

His parents had died six months before and the only time Francis appeared to have any sort of enthusiasm was when the three of them bullied the English boy down the street or when he attempted to woo Elizaveta or one of the other girls, of which Gilbert almost felt guilty for beating him up about.

Neither of them could understand. Gilbert had no idea why his mother one day disappeared or why his grandfather took he and his brother away from his father.

Antonio had been abandoned on the doorstep of an orphanage on the day he was born. The old woman who cared for him here was nice and he loved her, but she was not a parent.

Dead parents did not even enter the equation for either of them.

* * *

Okay, so maybe it started four months after that, when they had run away from Arthur's brothers after saving Francis from a bad breakup where Arthur blamed him for everything. They escaped to Gilbert's house, kicking Ludwig out of his room (Brian and Roy (_though mostly Brian, as he was the scariest to them right now_) would not find them there) and nursing their wounds.

"Your garden, your money," Gilbert said firmly. He would hang around, sure, but he was not planning on spending any of his hard-earned (read: stolen) money just to watch the other two work outside. He reminded them of his albino condition, which he was ready to use at the drop of a hat so he would not have to work.

"I went and asked Tino how much his mother would sell it to me if I asked her to have it all delivered," Antonio frowned, wincing as Francis cleaned off his scraped knee. "I don't have enough for it all. And _abuela_... I wouldn't want to ask her to pitch in for it, that would not be fair."

"I can pitch in a little," Francis said thoughtfully. "The flowers though. I really want you to have flowers. Roses and lilies."

"_Roses_ ant _lilies_?" Gilbert scoffed. Francis kicked him in the shin and with a curse he fell backwards on to the bed.

But Antonio really wanted tomatoes. With Francis helping out that left him with less he had to do on his own, but he still did not have nearly enough. Not on the weekly allowance he was given. "I need a job," he stated as firmly as he could. Francis looked slightly amused.

"With your work ethic, 'Tonio? Surely you're better off than Gilbert by miles–"

"–_hey!_"

"–but unless you find something that interests you you're likely to lounge about. It _is_ the summer."

"If I had a job, I wouldn't slack off," Antonio frowned, wincing against as Francis pushed down on the bandage he placed on his knee.

"Good luck trying to find anyding dat people vould vant you doing," Gilbert said from where he had sprawled himself out on his brother's bed, looking through the books stacked neatly on the shelf next to it. "...ugh, vhat happenet to de days vhen de little robot liked reading about explosions?"

"I'll find something," Antonio said as Francis placed a kiss over the bandage.

"Sure you will, _mon ami_."

Francis did not doubt that Antonio was driven at the moment, but that was simply it. It was just for now. Antonio phased in and out of things, just like he and Gilbert did, just at a different rate. Still, this wish might take a little too much effort for him to want to bother with past the planning stage. A day or two of trying to find a paying job and he would give up.

Or, more correctly, after a few weeks of doing odd jobs for free. Francis would simply loose his mind.

* * *

Never mind, it started a month after that, when Francis came up to him looking rather annoyed. "Why, Antonio? Why?"

"Hello Francis," Antonio said cheerfully. "Why what?"

Francis' jaw opened and shut as he hit himself in the forehead with his palm. "You drive me insane, you really do. The both of you."

"What?"

"I got you a job interview," Francis grabbed him by the wrist and started pulling him along. "And you are going to talk with him now."

"A... wait, an interview?" Antonio blinked, the word slightly beyond him at the moment. Interview made it sound _professional_. Which was rather daunting.

"I, being your reference, would prefer you not proving how much of an idiot I was by suggesting you," Francis hissed. "Okay, this is what it is. Mister Vargas' grandkid apparently needs some help with homework, so Mister Vargas said he would pay for someone in our class to help him out. I had to shut Eliza up before she took it."

"Now that wasn't very nice," Antonio blinked. Francis shrugged.

"She was all right with it when I explained what was going on. I told Mister Vargas you'd be the best for the job. Then I had to shut Arthur up before he started laughing. I've gone through a _lot_ today, so you'd better not mess it up!"

Antonio was ecstatic to have the opportunity and that Francis would do all of that for him. He did not quite understand why Arthur would have laughed or why Francis thought there was any chance of Antonio messing it up. "What subject?"

"History."

It was not math, so this seemed like a perfect job. Plus, Mister Vargas' grandson! Antonio had never known such a cute, sweet little kid. It would be a privilege to tutor Feliciano! "Are you sure I don't have to pay so I can be there?"

"What are you on?" Francis asked him, confused.

Antonio did not quite get what Francis meant, but in any case they had arrived at the restaurant, where he asked Mister Vargas whether he could be the tutor. He was hired right on the spot.

* * *

It took Antonio a while to remember that Mister Vargas did have another grandson. He had never seen the other kid, so it had slipped his mind at the time. Not that it mattered. Well, it mattered a little bit. Antonio was slightly disappointed that he would not be spending time with Feliciano, who was going out to play with Elizaveta.

"Play nice, Lovi~" Feliciano's voice wafted out to the hall.

"Shut up!"

Antonio stood next to Elizaveta at the front hall. "Who's that?" he asked her, rather confused.

"Never met Lovino?" she asked, looking slightly concerned. Then she patted him on the shoulder. "He's a good kid, 'Toni..."

"Lovino," Mister Vargas' voice could be heard. "That over there is Antonio. He is going to be helping you with your history homework!"

"Hell no!"

"...to women," Elizaveta finished with a shrug. "That's why I was going to volunteer."

"Oh." He was Feliciano's brother. Feliciano was so sweet, so how bad could Lovino be? He saw Feliciano as he ran over to tackle Elizaveta in a hug.

"Hi Antonio!" he said cheerfully, turning his head away from Elizaveta and smiling at him.

_He. Was. So. Cute._ Antonio could not help but smile back. "Hello Feli! What are you two going to be doing?"

"Eli has some fun clothes that I get to try on!" Feliciano exclaimed. Elizaveta grinned. It looked slightly maniacal. Antonio found himself rather uncertain. Still, Feliciano seemed okay with it...

"Now Lovino, go and say hello." Antonio looked over as Mister Vargas pushed another boy into the room. He seemed a little older than Feli, probably twelve. And if looks could kill Antonio figured Lovino wanted him to burst into flames.

"Go away, dumbass."

Feliciano gasped, covering his own ears. Mister Vargas laughed, coming up behind Lovino and placing a hand on either shoulder. "Now that's not nice, Lovino. Try again."

Lovino pouted. "Go away _please_... _cazzo_."

"Lovino," Elizaveta leaned down to him, placing a hand on his head. "Be nice for Antonio, 'kay?" Lovino looked away, arms folded across his chest.

It was difficult, but Antonio managed a smile. _What have I gotten myself into?_ "The sooner we start, the sooner you can play and not have to do homework~!"

"Whatever," Lovino scoffed, turning around and walking away. Antonio stared back over at the other three before he followed after.

"Whatever you're paying him isn't enough," he heard Elizaveta say to Mister Vargas.

"You think so?"

* * *

"How't it go?" Gilbert asked Antonio as he stepped into his house. Antonio stared blearily at him, then at Francis.

"Why are you both in my house?"

"Your grandma made us churros," Francis said, one in hand as he spoke. "So, speak up! What happened?"

"_Let's see your homework," Antonio began, sitting on the couch. Lovino pulled papers and books out of his bag and dropped them on the table, not bothering to do anything after that. "Is this your history boo–"_

"_Don't touch my stuff, bastard!" Lovino shouted, putting his arms out over it all right as Antonio had reached for the book, pulling it away from him._

"_Are you going to open it then?" Antonio asked hesitantly. Lovino glared at him and did not move._

"_I don't have to do this. You can't make me do anything."_

"_But don't you want to get this over with?" Antonio asked, confused. Lovino did not respond, just glaring at him more._

_He wished again that it was the cute Feliciano here with him. Then again, why should he wish the inability to do homework on Feliciano? No, that was not nice. _Abuela_ would be ashamed to know he had thought that. Antonio would simply have to buckle down and feel out the territory._

_This should not be hard, he had practically been tutoring Gilbert since they had met._

"Hey, dat's not true!" Gilbert denied vehemently. As Antonio sat down next to Francis, the French boy snickered. "Shut up!"

"Oh, you shut up Gilbert," Francis waved him away. "So Lovino was really stubborn?"

"I don't think that begins to describe _any_ of it," Antonio shook his head.

"_You're supposed to redo this assignment?" Antonio questioned as Lovino scribbled on the back of another paper. Antonio frowned and looked at it. "These are good answers. Why is it that you need to redo it...?"_

"_Hell if I know," Lovino responded quietly. "If they're good enough, you don't have to be here."_

_Antonio carefully took another paper from the mess (hoping not to be bitten again) and looked at that. This one had been turned in completely blank. It did not make sense. Then he looked at the first one again._

"_Did you just copy this out of the textbook?"_

"_Fuck you." Antonio winced at the language._

"_Does Mister Vargas really let you talk like that?"_

"_Are you really just that stupid?"_

_Antonio suddenly believed this was the worst job in the world. He was running out of his limitless patience quickly. "Is history really the only subject you need help with?" he asked blankly. And maybe _that_ was a stupid question. Lovino stared at him._

"_You _are_ stupid. Why are you even here?"_

"_Because you need help with your homework!" Antonio smiled, settling himself down by reminding himself of his plans for the garden. He wanted to start plotting out the land this weekend._

"_I don't want you here. I want Elizaveta."_

"_I'm sorry," Antonio said honestly, "but she's out with your brother–"_

_Lovino threw his book at him and Antonio barely managed to get his hands up in time to catch it. "Of course she is! I don't need you to tell me that!" Lovino stood up and Antonio caught him by the wrist._

"_We are going to fix this assignment." He was not asking anymore. It was all Antonio could do to keep his tone pleasant._

"_Let go of me!"_

"_And when we are done with this assignment, we can take a break! Then we will do this one~!"_

"_What the hell?"_

Gilbert looked at the clock. "It took you four hours to do two homevork assignments?"

Antonio grimaced. "It took us four hours to complete _one_."

Francis snickered again. "I think Lovino's competing with me for the quickest time to see the infamous 'Two-Faced Antonio'!" Without looking, Antonio shoved the churro into Francis' face.

"Man," Gilbert whistled. "You gonna keep this up?"

"I get paid by the hour!" Antonio responded cheerfully as Francis coughed on his churro. "He needs help with his homework and I need the money. We can help each other!"

To tell the truth, Antonio was dreading the next day.

* * *

It took two weeks before Antonio was able to reach for the book or one of the papers without Lovino trying to bite him. Lovino would simply glare at him. Not like that was different from all of the other times Lovino would glare at him.

"_There is a good in everyone,"_ the woman he called grandmother had always told him, ever since he was little. Antonio tried to believe that.

"Why are you here?" Lovino would always ask him.

"Because you need help with your homework!" Antonio would always respond.

It was just so difficult for Antonio to understand. How could someone be so angry? As it was he had thought Ludwig was confusing, the quiet and stern child he was... it did not seem right for a child to be that against fun (Antonio knew about this well enough, first Gilbert would complain about it and now Feliciano was talking about Ludwig a lot). Lovino was even more confusing. He was angry with everyone and everything. Antonio had never seen him smile, or even have anything less than a frown on his face. Not even around his brother, of which almost seemed to make Lovino worse.

How could anyone have a frown on their face around Feliciano?

"Feliciano told me you have a test next week," Antonio started, flipping through the pages of the chapter they had been working on.

"No," Lovino responded, but Antonio had come to expect that. Holding back a sigh he went to the back of the chapter.

"We can go through the study questions~!"

Lovino set down his pencil. "What do _you _do to prepare for tests, moron?"

Antonio thought about it. "I usually first read through the chapter–"

With that, Lovino ripped the book from his hands and left the room. Blinking a few times, Antonio followed after. "Lovino? Are you reading the chapter?" He stopped in front of his room. "Lovino...?"

"Yeah. So go away."

He stood there for a few more moments before he decided he would pretend that was what was going on and went to go organize Lovino's papers before he left. They still had these assignments to fix. These were new assignments Lovino had not even looked at – not all of which were history, but most which were. Why was Lovino so against history? He would at least fill in the other papers, even if they were not all right...

Antonio picked up an envelope. It was crumpled up, but addressed to Mister Vargas. Antonio realized that Mister Vargas had probably never seen it. While his first reaction was to take it to the oldest Vargas, another part of his mind stopped him. It was the part of his mind that usually filled in for Francis and Gilbert when they were not there.

It was a part of his mind he should probably get rid of, but had not gotten around to it yet.

–_**it appears nothing I can do will get through to your grandson. While I hate to hold any child back, it will likely be in his best interest unless his grades improve...**_

_**P.S. Lovino, if your grandfather does not read this letter, do know that I am calling home. This **_**will**_** be discussed.**_

Huh.

Antonio stuck it back into Lovino's bag. He had a feeling this situation was beyond him. He did not know what to do. This was a mistake.

* * *

"Vater?"

"Ah, I see you have decided to make yourself useful in _some_ way," Francis retorted, leaning against his shovel as Antonio took one of the glasses.

"Just for dat, you can get your own vater."

The garden was beginning to take form. At least, where everything was going to be. Antonio had not managed to by the vegetable seeds (and tomato seeds) yet, but Francis had gotten the flowers he wanted, so they were going to plant those. It was a start. Tilling the earth was hard work that Gilbert had gotten himself out of by mentioning that he was going to get horribly burnt. Antonio was starting to think Gilbert really liked being an albino for these very reasons.

"Hi Antonio!" Antonio turned to see Feliciano on the road, waving at them. "Hi Gilbert, hi Francis!"

"Hello Feli~!" Antonio waved back. Gilbert was grinning.

"Hafing fun, Ludwig?"

Ludwig did not look like he was, but he did not pull away as Feliciano ran onward, pulling Ludwig by the hand. "Of course he is! Bye~"

"Speaking of Italians," Francis mentioned, taking his glass from Gilbert. "You know Lovino hates me just because of association with you?"

"I doubt that's the case..." Antonio frowned.

"From all vhat you'fe told us, he just hates eferyding," Gilbert nodded. Setting his empty glass down, Antonio went back to work.

It was all for this garden. Francis seemed happy with doing this, so that was good. Gilbert was out here with them instead of getting in trouble somewhere else (without them). And when Antonio looked back at his house, he could see _abuela_ smiling.

This garden was for _her_.

She loved tomatoes so much.

He could keep up this tutoring so as to get enough money to make this garden a reality. Plus, Lovino was finally doing his homework. He could not stop now, he had come so far.

"I can't beliefe Ludwig is actually letting Feliciano drag him around," Gilbert was saying, sounding excited. "Ludwig von't efen let _me_ do anyding vith him."

"You certainly make us think you're lying when you say you two used to be close," Francis responded. Antonio nodded, though he was not certain that was the right thing to say.

Neither Francis or he had siblings. How siblings were supposed to be came to them in the form of Gilbert and Ludwig, or Arthur and his big brothers. Or Berwald and his cousins. It was confusing for Antonio, to say the least.

"Ve vere," Gilbert scowled at them. "Den he got hurt or someding. Vhen he vas five, I remember finting him..."

Gilbert stopped talking. Antonio looked up.

"Gilbert?"

"Was... was it bad?" Francis asked.

"He nearly died," Gilbert muttered, pulling his legs up on the chair he was sitting in, hugging them to his chest. "Dere vas blood efervhere. He didn't know me, he didn't remember anyding."

Antonio put his tools aside, walking back over to Gilbert and hugging him. "I'm sorry."

"Vhatefer," Gilbert tried to shrug.

"Not whatever," Francis responded, resting his hand on Gilbert's shoulder.

"I... I just vish I knew vhat happened to him. I vish I had been dere."

Dealing with Lovino did not seem like it should be that difficult after that. Francis and Gilbert had actually dealt with hardship. What was the worst thing to ever happen to him? Nothing, Antonio did not have something like that. He did not want to have something like that.

_All right, Lovino. I'll find some way to make this work_.

* * *

"I found this movie on the Renaissance, let's watch it! It will help you with your test!"

Lovino stared at him. It took him a few seconds to turn it into a glare, so Antonio figured either the other was tired or he had managed to surprise him. "You're not supposed to be here today, bastard."

"There is always time for learning!" Antonio said happily, stopping as he looked curiously at Lovino. "What are you making?"

Lovino flushed, pressing his back against the stove. "N-nothing! Go away! What are you even doing here? I don't care fuck about that test!"

Setting the movie on the counter, Antonio squatted down to look up at Lovino. "Why, Lovino?"

"Because!" Lovino retorted. "It's just history! Who cares about a bunch of old dead people? It's all in the past, it doesn't matter now!"

"Why wouldn't it matter? Because it happened is why any of us are here!"

"Doesn't mean I have to care!"

Antonio blinked, smile falling off his face. "But you don't seem to care about anything."

His eyes instinctively shut when an oven mitt hit him in the face. Opening them again, Antonio stared at the glove on the ground and then where the footsteps ran off to. Putting the glove on the counter, Antonio left and went home.

_Make it work? Make what work? There is nothing there to work!_ Lovino would not work with him, he could not change the mind of someone who did not want to listen.

That was it.

He would call Mister Vargas later. He had tried, but there was nothing to work with. Nothing he did, nothing he said made any difference with Lovino. Maybe Lovino would do better with Elizaveta. Of course he would do better with Elizaveta, he did not seem to have any problems with her.

Not that he smiled to her either. He never smiled.

"_Oh dear... I can tell you're in a bad mood_," his _abuela_ said when he walked into the house. She was sitting in her rocking chair, patching up one of his blankets.

"_What do you want for dinner?_" he asked her with a smile.

"_Don't you start_," she smiled, continuing to look down at her work. "_Come, I know you went to see the young Vargas. I thought you were going to watch that movie with him._"

Antonio hesitated.

"_Grandmother, I don't think there is any good in him_."

She stopped her sewing, setting it down in her lap. "_Come over here, child_." Shuffling his feet, Antonio walked up to her and she looked straight up at him, kind gaze firm. "_There is a good in everyone. I hope I live long enough to see you accept this_," she raised her trembling hands up, cupping his face in those pale tanned fingers. "_You thought Francis a liar._"

Antonio nodded. He had.

"_And you thought Gilbert a criminal_."

Antonio nodded again. Their first impressions had not been good.

"_They are now your best friends. We all have our faults. It is the way the Lord allowed us to be. He gave us curiosity and through that we make mistakes. We are all capable of evil, but only because we are all capable of good._"

More then anything, Antonio wished he could believe as deeply in Him as she did.

"_There is good in him, Antonio. It is your task to find it._"

Patting his cheek, she removed one of her hands and grabbed the necklace about her neck. Antonio reached to help her, but she removed it on her own, setting the rosary beads in his hand. "_I can't take this_," Antonio shook his head.

"_Hush, you can_," she smiled, returning to her sewing. "_It will help you think of good. It will remind you of good. It will help others see good._"

"_How_?" he asked.

"_Because you will be reminded and when you remember good others will see it within you_." Leaning back, she looked up at him once again. "_How did you leave that boy, Antonio?_"

If there was the epitome of good in the world, it was her. Antonio felt like an idiot. Turning, he ran back out the door, slipping the beads around his neck.

* * *

"Lovino?"

He let himself in as Mister Vargas always said he could. Knocking at Lovino's door, he wondered if the boy was even there. Pressing his head against the door, he tried to listen in. Which was when the door hit him in the head. "Ow!"

"_Che cosa vuoi, carogna?_" Lovino spat. Rubbing at his head, Antonio looked up to see that Lovino's eyes were red. Had he been crying? He found himself wondering why he had ever thought that Lovino was incapable of it. Lovino might have been a bad kid, but Antonio knew it did not help that he did not know how to deal with him.

"_Yo no hablo italiano_," Antonio admitted with a smile. Lovino stared at him.

"What the hell?"

"You spoke in Italian, I though that meant I could speak in my first language," Antonio admitted with a shrug. Lovino glowered up at him, hand still on the doorknob.

"What do you..." he trailed off. Antonio squatted down so they would be closer. Actually, so Lovino would not have to crane his neck upward. "What are you wearing?"

Antonio stared down at himself. "Clothes?" he asked, confused.

"No!" Lovino shook his head, pointing at his chest. Antonio followed his finger to the rosary.

"Rosary beads? They are–"

"I know what they are, bastard, I'm Catholic!" Lovino exclaimed. "But why are you wearing them?"

"You're Catholic?" Antonio asked, surprised. That did not make much sense at all. "You're a rather horrible Catholic, aren't you?"

Right off the bat Antonio knew he said the wrong thing again. Lovino looked at him with something which he could only equivocate to unadulterated fury, right before he ran at him. Antonio slipped backward, falling on his behind and he tried to avoid the other's fists. It lasted five seconds before suddenly Lovino burst into tears.

"Lovino?" Antonio questioned as the boy tried to turn and hide away once more in his room. Antonio reached and grabbed him, pulling him into his arms before he could do so. Lovino did not even try to hit him again, simply pressing his face into Antonio's chest and sobbing.

He did not know why, but Antonio was suddenly aware that there was a lot more than just an angry kid right here. There was a lot more to Lovino. There was a reason he hated history. There was a reason he said he was Catholic. There was a reason he was crying right now.

"_Shh..._ It's okay. Big brother's here for you. Okay, Lovi? It's all right." Antonio patted his head, pressing his nose against Lovino's shoulder.

"N-no... you won't be... n-n-no... why are you h-here?"

There was a reason Lovino kept asking that.

Antonio smiled into his neck. "Because you need me here, silly."

"You're an idiot." For once, Lovino did not sound like he meant it. It was easy enough for Antonio to decide that he probably had not actually meant it all of those other times either.

He would figure it out.

"Want to watch that movie I brought? I hear it's a good movie... studying or no."

"No," Lovino sniffed. Antonio started to believe he did not mean that either. So he picked the boy up and set him on the couch.

The movie _was_ good.

* * *

"Hey! Fran say ve're not vorking at de garden today?" Gilbert asked him, catching Antonio as he had walked out the door.

"Sorry, something came up~!" Antonio responded happily. The German stared at him for a few moments, simply looking confused.

"...like vhat?"

"I'm going to see Lovino," Antonio told him.

Gilbert looked horrified. "I dought you didn't hafe to be dere on de veekends!"

"I don't!

"Den vhy?"

Trying to think of a way to describe it, Antonio came up with nothing. "Because," he finally answered with, leaving Gilbert there. _Sorry my friends, but someone else needs me more right now._

It took him a total of an hour to convince Lovino to come outside and play with him, but Antonio did not falter. Never once did he think about giving up, because all of those insults and denials just did not seem to weigh as heavily anymore. He did not know why Lovino retreated into that, but he obviously needed someone to realize what he was actually saying.

So he just tried to hear what was not being said.

* * *

**Monday.**

"How did your test go?"

Lovino scoffed, scribbling on the back of another paper. "Okay, I guess. It was boring."

"But you knew what it was asking, right?" Antonio asked as Lovino handed him a paper which appeared to be a science assignment.

"Fill that out."

"Aw~ I'm not doing your homework, Lovi," Antonio smiled. Lovino stared up at him, face red.

"Shit! Don't call me that!"

"Lovi?" Antonio questioned, making certain he knew what Lovino was asking.

"Don't!"

Antonio thought about the request. Then he looked at Lovino again. "Lovi~"

Lovino blushed even more and put his face back down to his picture. Studying that, Antonio was rather aware that Lovino reminded him of a tomato. At least, the colour was similar. Antonio could not have stopped smiling if he tried.

"You are so adorable, Lovi."

"What are you on, bastard?"

* * *

_Notes:_

"Che cosa vuoi, carogna?"_ = "What do you want, asshole?"_

"Yo no hablo italiano"_ = "I don't speak Italian."_

_Gilbert, Antonio, and Francis were rather close, because in the nature of Hearth that people did not seem to live there very long. It was a belief of theirs that the more they could cram into a day the less time they were wasting before one of them left. Little would they know the first and only one of them to leave would be Francis, and by his own choice when he and Arthur ran off._

_Class sizes in Hearth are very small still, though nowhere near as small as what Arthur teaches in present day Hearth. Arthur basically does one on one. None of _those_ children will be left behind, goddammit._

_The scene between Antonio and his grandmother was spoken completely in Spanish, which is why I decided not to have every single thing translated. No, it just gets to be in italics._

_I want to write more with this. You know, the part where they actually fall for each other and crap like that. I just did not want to put it in here, because I think the important part with this was simply overcoming Lovino's animosity._

_Anyway, I knew I had to get this typed out before I got to the wedding day. Before it gets to the vows and all of that, or else things would not make sense. Actually, it would make sense, but now everyone can get where they started._


	7. More Than His Garden

_Again, long before CoE, about one and a half years after _History Of A Garden_._

* * *

**More Than His Garden**

To tell the truth, Lovino had no idea why it was that he had not thought about this before. It was obvious. Yet, he had not thought about it at all. He had never considered it. In the year (or more? He did not remember) this had been going on it was the one thing he had not thought about, despite thinking at first that the other was here for a completely different reason than what he said.

Then he saw it.

Maybe if he was still twelve he would have thrown a fit. Antonio always noticed his fits. But Marcus was there as well and Lovino did not want his grandfather to pay attention to his fit. It would end up with him being compared to Feliciano, he just knew it. Or (even worse) Feliciano would show up and start acting as if the world was made out of puppy-dogs and pasta and that he should come out and play with him and Ludwig because it would be fun.

Lovino did not like Ludwig. He did not like Feliciano either.

Those were the reasons he did not throw a fit. Even though he just wanted Antonio to tell him it was not true. Even though it was true and Lovino could understand why it was. Why would Antonio be here for _him_ anyway?

Peeking through the door, opened only a crack, he watched as Marcus paid Antonio for tutoring him this week. Then he closed the door.

"Of course..." he chuckled to himself weakly, refusing to cry about something he just should have known. "I should have known that."

His grandfather had to pay for someone to spend time with him. And Lovino was enough trouble Antonio did not even always bother with the tutoring part. Was that it?

"Bastard."

Sniffling, wiping his face off on his sleeve, Lovino locked himself up in his room.

* * *

Antonio was aware just how much more friendly the adults were toward the three of them while they were in the garden. Probably because they were being productive and not causing trouble? That sounded right. Gilbert was actually planting with them, bored of just watching and seeming to like having the hose in hand to spray them with water.

"I'm just not certain what to get Lovino and Feliciano for their birthdays," Antonio said, wiping the water out of his face as Francis wrestled Gilbert for the hose. Francis lost and sat up, still on the ground, moving his hair out of his eyes.

He was also wondering how to pay for whatever he would be buying. As it was he was struggling to meet up with what the garden needed. Probably because he was not tutoring Lovino as much anymore. But Lovino did not need as much tutoring! He was doing so much better now, Antonio only had to show up once a week for that now. Which meant he and Lovino could use up the rest of the times that week to do other things!

"Anyone ever wonder how strange it is that they were born on the same day?" Francis asked as he wrung his hair out. "It is like their parents decided to have at it on the same day two years in a–"

"Anyone efer hate dis time of year?" Gilbert retorted as he actually turned the water on the flowers which still were alive as opposed to turning it on Antonio. "Ludwig goes ballistic! '_Vhat should I get Feliciano? Vhat vould Feliciano like? Feliciano, Feliciano, Feliciano_!' I love de kid, really, but my bruder can make me tired of hearing his name! I can't vait for dat party to be done ant ofer..."

"Sounds like love~" Antonio smiled widely. Gilbert scoffed, rolling his eyes.

"Vhatefer gafe you dat idea?" he retorted sarcastically. Francis mimed stabbing Gilbert with a trowel as his back was turned.

"I just find it funny that you are the only one who says it that way," Francis suddenly mentioned, looking over at Antonio. Antonio paused, thinking about it.

"Says... _what_ what way?"

"_Lovino_ and Feliciano," Francis said.

"As opposed to vhat?" Gilbert asked, turning off the hose.

"Feliciano and _Lovino_," Francis put emphasis on Lovino's name again, still looking at Antonio. "You're the only one that puts his name first."

Antonio almost responded, but then he thought about it. Had he really? He had never noticed, the order of their names when he mentioned the both of them was not something he thought about. "Do I really?"

"_Mon ami_, and that does not include the fact most people do not bother to mention Lovino at all," Francis continued, tapping a finger against his chin, where he had been trying to grow a beard. Gilbert and he had not mentioned how ridiculous it looked yet, deciding rather that they should snicker at him behind his back.

"You _hafe_ been spending a lot of time vith him," Gilbert said, folding his arms across his chest with a frown.

"Yes?"

"Even more than just to tutor him," Francis added. Antonio wondered what their point was.

"What? Am I not allowed to have friends besides the both of you?" Antonio asked, rather amused at the thought of the both of them being jealous.

"Fuck no," Gilbert shook his head. "It's just... ah..."

"We've been teasing Ludwig about Feliciano when there was an even closer target~!" Francis said in a sing-song voice. His words, however, seemed rather stupid.

"Of course there are closer targets," Antonio responded. "We tease Gilbert about Elizaveta and Gilbert and I tease you about Arthur."

Francis frowned. "That's not what I was referring to."

"Speaking of vhich, I heard dat Roy's got a varrant out for your arrest," Gilbert smirked widely, punching Francis in the shoulder.

"Not a _real_ one," Francis responded, rubbing at his shoulder. "He just wants me to stay away from the house."

"And what does your fair Arthur think of that?" Antonio asked.

"Fair nothing," Francis tsked. "He snuck into _my_ house last night, so I would say he does not care too much."

Antonio and Gilbert stayed quiet as Francis went to the rose bushes. "I dink I feel dirty just by knowing him," Gilbert said quietly with a grimace. Instead of making the comparison which came to mind, Antonio glanced at his house, hoping that the windows were closed and his _abuela_ did not hear that.

* * *

Still, Antonio was left still wondering what he should get Lovino for his birthday. It was relatively easy to come up with something for Feliciano, Feliciano up and asked whether he could have first pick at some of his vegetables when they were ripe and Antonio agreed right off the bat.

It did make him wonder whether Lovino would like something from his garden. Knowing the boy, however, he would like something _on_ the day, instead of a promise for something in the future. Antonio knew, in the future, if he _was_ going to promise something to Lovino he would have to have something to give him right on the spot so that he would believe it.

With a few ideas in mind, but not a mind to decide what Lovino might want the most, he finally went to ask Lovino what he thought would be best.

"I think he's in his room," Feliciano told him, covered in paint from trying to help his 'student'. "No Ludwig! That's good, good! _Ve_~ Don't cover it up!"

"Thank you~" Antonio responded, leaving Feliciano to put himself all over Ludwig so as to keep Ludwig from giving up on his painting. He left the two of them there, ignoring Ludwig's near look of plea for an escape. After all, he did not _really_ want to get out! He just _thought_ he did right now!

Antonio knocked on Lovino's door. "Lovi~? Want to go out? I thought we could have a pre-birthday celebration, just you and me!"

It was quiet.

With a smile, Antonio knocked again. "Lovino~ I know you're in there! Would you rather stay in instead? We could watch a movie!"

Quiet. Antonio blinked at the door.

"Lovino?"

"Go. Away."

"Aw... Lovi, you don't mean that!" Antonio announced. Lovino never meant it when he said that. It was almost a shout for people to stay.

"I do, and don't call me that."

"Why not?" Antonio asked, trying to glance through the keyhole. Unlike all of those movies he had seen it happen in, he could not see through it to the other side. Antonio continued to wait and Lovino continued to be silent. "Is there something wrong? You can tell me~!"

"Fuck. Off."

"Language!" Antonio reminded him cheerfully. He waited, as any moment Lovino was going to open the door to yell at him. And when it did not happen Antonio suddenly realized that something was actually wrong. "Lovino? You know you can tell me what's going on. We could go to my place and I could make _tapas_!"

Lovino did not respond. Two hours and Antonio decided that if nothing he had said in all that time got anything, then Lovino might have gone to sleep.

He had not done this since the first month he had known him. What was going on?

"I have to go, Lovi. But I'll come back after school tomorrow for the party~"

Antonio stood there, waiting for an answer that did not come. Staring down at his feet, he finally turned and left.

* * *

"...I just don't know."

Gilbert shrugged, taking one of Antonio's_ chorizo_'s, as he always did during luncheon. Antonio did not remember if he ever cared too much, though he did remember asking why Gilbert never brought anything from home. It was likely laziness. Antonio might have had the same problem, but for _abuela_ who took packing his lunches as one of her tasks, no matter what he said.

"It doesn't sound too different of him," Gilbert said, chewing away at the cold sausage. Antonio shook his head.

"It is, he is terrible at saying something and then doing it. It's almost always the opposite."

"Den you're talkin' to de vrong person," Gilbert rose an eyebrow. "I life vith Ludwig, vhere it alvays _is_ vhat he says it is. Vhen he isn't lying about Feliciano, dat is."

"That is true, and I would have liked to talk to Francis about it opposed to you," Antonio nodded, mulling over it.

"Hey!"

"...where is he anyway?"

"Abandoned us for Arthur. _Again_." Gilbert pointed over to where Arthur had been sitting, leaning against the school wall, where now Francis was bothering him.

Antonio shook his head. Gilbert took another sausage. They both watched as the other two started another fight and Arthur stood up to leave. Francis grabbed him, hands around his hips and pulling the other down into his lap.

"_Gott_, I know vhere dis is going," Gilbert groaned. "I don't hafe to vatch dis. Let's go."

Antonio gathered up his lunch and followed after. He decided to ask Francis during class instead, taking him as his literature partner immediately. Gilbert glared at them, immediately trying to get Elizaveta, who had practically vaulted across the room to partner up with Arthur.

Single partner groups were always very interesting to come up with when there was an even number of people in class that day.

"Lovino ignored me yesterday," Antonio said immediately, as they had managed to settle themselves into the back corner of the classroom, surrounded by the shelves with the history books that their teacher collected.

"Really?" Francis asked, flipping through the pages of _Romeo and Juliet_.

"Maybe ignored isn't the best word... He was in his room and he wouldn't open the door or tell me why he wouldn't see me!" Antonio went on to say, wiggling his pencil between his fingers, it rapidly hitting him in the knee. "Do you think I did something wrong?" he asked him, staring up from his book.

"Maybe..."

As the Frenchman began to doodle on his worksheet Antonio realized that not only was Francis not interested in hearing about it, it was not even in lieu of pretending he wanted to work. Probably still distracted because the teacher nearly had to drag him and Arthur in late after lunch was over.

Antonio frowned for a moment, before smiling once more, settling himself on his stomache and flattening his book open to Act I Scene 5. "Win your argument?"

"Hm."

"What is that? Arthur agreed with you?"

"It could be."

"You two getting married~?"

"Uh-huh..."

"He told you you are the only one~?"

"I _am_." Francis looked up at Antonio, eyes narrowed in anger. Antonio blinked.

"Is something wrong?"

"Just do your work Antonio."

Francis was in a bad mood. Antonio figured their argument was eventually won by Arthur, or Francis had been wanting a bit more from the other man before class started and was currently suffering because of it.

Because of that, he did not pry, trying to do his own work, mind distracted. He would just talk with Lovino today. It was probably something he could fix... he would just have to do more than talk at him from outside of his door. Maybe it was because Feliciano was throwing that party today? Antonio remembered last year, when he noticed how much Lovino hated it. Was that always the same?

...that was it! Lovino was just upset again because of Feliciano's party! That would be easy enough to fix!

* * *

Antonio stuck around for thirty minutes with the other guests before he knocked on Lovino's door again. "Lovino?" he called in, waiting for a response. Mister Vargas had told him Lovino went straight here after coming home, so he had to be in here. "Lovino?"

This time Antonio stopped knocking after five minutes. _That_ was not working. "Open your window, okay?" he said to the door before he left. He waved over at Gilbert, who was busy trying to keep Ludwig from escaping into the kitchen before he left, walking around the house. Antonio looked up at Lovino's window.

Here went nothing.

Jumping up, he grabbed at the top of the large window which looked into the living room, his feet catching on the sill. He probably could have been wearing better shoes for this. He did not want to get footprints on Mister Vargas' window, so he tried to hop up and grab up at the bricks. It took a couple attempts before he got any sort of hold at all and Antonio found himself hanging by that hand.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Hello Lovi~" Antonio said with a smile as his eye caught sight of where a brick was missing from the old house. He tried to grab for that. "How are you doing?"

"Th-that didn't answer my question, you bastard!" Lovino nearly squeaked, face peering down at him.

"Vhat are you doing?"

Antonio looked down to where Gilbert was hissing at him from. "Climbing."

"Get down!" both Lovino and Gilbert said at the same time. Antonio was rather touched by their concern, however unwarranted it was.

"But you wouldn't let me see you Lovi! Would you open the door for me if I got down?"

"Hell no!"

"Say yes, you little brat!" Gilbert said. Antonio stared down at him.

"Don't talk to Lovino like that Gilbert! It's almost his birthday!"

"Just get down here, 'Toni!"

Antonio's left foot slipped and he had to bring it up a few times before it found a place against the wall where it would stay still. "I'm coming up then."

"No!"

"Antonio, I swear..." Gilbert began as Antonio pulled himself further up again, hand feeling about for another place to grab on. This seemed easier on television, the window in question always had a tree or vines growing up the side of it. "I'm gonna tell Mister Vargas!"

Everyone was making such a big deal out of this. "Why?" he asked Gilbert as he slipped his foot into that hold his hand had just been in.

"Vhy do you dink?"

Lovino shut the window. Antonio blinked up at it for a moment before continuing upward. He did not hear Gilbert yelling at him anymore, so he figured he had gone inside. With one more heft upward, Antonio knocked at the window.

"Lovino? I know you know I'm here~"

The window opened again. Lovino looked, for lack of any other word, positively scared. Which was not what Antonio had hoped for. His foot slipped and he nearly cracked his chin against the corner of the window sill. "Idiot!" Lovino shouted, grabbing at his arm and pulling.

Antonio managed to push his foot against something and clambered inside, slipping in on top of Lovino as they both fell on the floor. Antonio sat up, getting off of Lovino, putting a hand out to him. "Are you all right? I didn't mean to squish you~"

With a glare (surprisingly he did not go red as Antonio had expected), Lovino hit his hand aside. Antonio simply put it back at his side, not phased. "What is wrong with you?"

"What do you mean?" he asked, confused though not giving up his smile for it.

"Just _stop_ pretending!" Lovino demanded, getting to his feet and walking away from him. Antonio got to his feet as well, nearly tripping over a set of Lovino's paints.

"Pretending?" he asked, wondering if Lovino only thought this was something Antonio would know about or whether this was something he really should have known about. "What about?"

"All of it!" Lovino shouted at him, opening the door. "Go away!"

"..._Antonio?_" a voice wafted in through the window.

"All...?" Antonio questioned before he poked his head outside. "Hello~!" he waved down at Francis, Gilbert, Mister Vargas and the others down there before he pulled his head back in and closed the window. Turning around he walked over to Lovino, but not through the door. "All of what?" he asked, reaching to place a hand on Lovino's head.

"Just– stop!"

He froze right before he touched him. Lovino's fists were clenched, his head was turned downward, but most of all his eyes were shut as if he were expecting to be hit. Withdrawing his hands, Antonio squatted down so that he could look up.

"I know, okay? I know. So just stop."

Antonio pushed the door shut. "What... what is it that you know, Lovino?"

"That you're only here... you're only here because grandpa is paying you. To t-tutor me. I know that. So stop trying to be my friend! S-s-s..."

Lovino could not say more as he had started crying. Antonio stared at him. Lovino thought the only reason he was here was to tutor him? Why? If that was the case, why did Lovino think he came around for all of the not-tutoring? "Lovi–"

"I told you about _mammina_!" Lovino shrieked, covering his face. "I told you and it didn't matter, did it? I told you and you probably didn't even care! You just got _paid_–"

He cared!_¡Maldita sea!_

"_Lovino_!"

He grabbed the younger teen by the shoulders and pulled him in for a hug. Lovino struggled, as he always did, but Antonio did not let go, resting his head on Lovino's shoulder.

"Don't you dare start talking, don't you dare try and make me feel better, don't you _dare_–"

Antonio let Lovino rant himself until he started sobbing hiccups (which solicited Italian insults that Antonio knew by this point were _very_ bad), stroking his hair the entire time. Lovino liked it when he had his hands in his hair, he knew that. Hopefully it would calm him down?

"True, I get paid to tutor you," he began, leaning back against the wall. "I'm grateful to your grandfather for the opportunity, not as much for the money as I am for you! At first it was for the money, for my garden... but that lasted about two weeks. I spend time with you just to spend time with you, Lovi. Is that okay?"

He let Lovino pull back, as the other was doing so gently. "Garden?" he asked, confused.

"My garden! I've told you about my garden."

"I don't listen to you." Antonio laughed, ruffling up his hair. Lovino scowled, trying to get off of him, but Antonio did not let him. "Dammit. I just said I don't listen to you – doesn't that make you mad? What's wrong with you?"

"Because you _do _listen," Antonio said thoughtfully. "You only say you don't because you think I don't listen to you. You don't think I can understand what you mean as opposed to what you say so you try and tell me in the best way you know how... by telling me what you are afraid I'm going to do."

Lovino went stiff.

Antonio stared at the wall, resting his cheek against Lovino's. "Is that okay enough? For being pretend to you~?"

Pulling his head away, Lovino glared at him before staring down. Finally he went bright red and tried to move out of Antonio's lap. Antonio at last let him go. Lovino walked back over to the window, but bent over to grab a box of tissues out of a pile of clothes.

"We can skip the rest of the party downstairs, if you'd like."

Blowing his nose, Lovino finally turned back to him.

"Garden?" he asked, voice quiet and slightly sulky. Antonio smiled, getting to his feet.

"I'll show you!" he announced, reaching out with his hand and wiggling his fingers for Lovino to take. Lovino walked past him, wiping his eyes off again with his sleeve as he opened the door.

"Just... just go on," Lovino waved ahead of himself.

Antonio did so, effectively missing as Lovino's face turned even redder, hands trying to rub the heat off of his cheeks.

* * *

"Vas it vorth it?" Gilbert said, tone obviously annoyed. Antonio did not care too much though, his friends could become so easily annoyed.

"Of course it was! And he was just so adorable when I was showing him the garden, I almost couldn't stand it~"

"Could not stand vhat?" Gilbert asked, looking confused. Antonio shrugged with a smile. If Gilbert did not get it, he did not get it. There was not much to say about it, if he could not tell! Antonio glanced over to Francis, who barely seemed to be paying attention to the conversation.

"Did you have fun at the party, Francis?" he asked, having already had Gilbert's version of the events. Ludwig was so obviously head over heels for Feliciano the situation was almost as adorable as Lovino.

Francis looked away from the window and at him. "I suppose. I'm sorry, I'm just tired. I should stop butchering your fun, _oui_?"

"Dude, you are a dead veight," Gilbert retorted. Francis smiled wryly at them, getting out of the chair he was sitting in.

"Give my apologies to your grandmother, Antonio," Francis said, waving at the both of them before excusing himself.

"Get some rest!" Antonio called after him, waving back. Gilbert scoffed, downing his milkshake, then coughing on it. "You drink everything like it's beer."

"Speaking of vhich, sneaking some more of dat from de store sounds like a great idea," Gilbert retorted, mouth snapping shut as _abuela_ entered the room with food. Antonio got up to help her with it. They both waited until she had let them be before continuing their conversation.

"I don't think so."

"I could be drinking legally now if I still vas in Germany," Gilbert snorted, picking up his fork. "Or if Miss Väinämöinen wasn't so stingy."

"You could be smoking too~" Antonio mentioned with a slight smile, resting his head in his hand. Gilbert pulled a face.

"You joking? Dat is disgusting."

Antonio supposed drinking was definitely nothing to compare with smoking, but frankly he did not understand the appeal of either of it. It just had not tasted that good. Francis assured him it was the brand. Antonio did not get it.

Not that he missed _too_ much... right?

* * *

"I thought you would be telling me to study for exams or whatever," Lovino mentioned, burying his hands deep into his pockets on a rather brisk May morning.

"But I have been doing that~!" Antonio responded cheerily. "We both need a break from classwork... what would be wrong with a break?"

"Are you even going to graduate?" Lovino grumbled. Antonio decided to smile and not reply to that question, knowing that Lovino was simply trying to cover his pleasure that he was not having to study. Even though Antonio could have hoped for a warmer day than this. He hated the cold. Still, today was today and they were going to enjoy it whether slightly cold or not!

"There's nothing to do here."

"There's plenty to do here~"

"Nothing _interesting_."

"Want to go down to the stream?"

"I don't want to go into the woods, dammit!"

"Lovi~ I don't think it is as much of a question of there being nothing to do rather than the fact you don't want to do anything! Ha ha~!"

"Hmph!"

Today, however, Antonio finally managed to get Lovino do some people watching with him at the corner of Mister Vargas' restaurant. Lovino complained, but he obviously did not mind too much. Why he did not mind this as opposed to anything else Antonio had suggested today was beyond him. Probably because it did not require moving. Lovino could be very lazy. Not that Antonio minded, he could be lazy too! But... not so much, maybe.

"Ah! What the hell are you doing, Feliciano?"

"Lovino~! Ludwig just got me some ice cream, do you–"

"It's probably disgusting!" Lovino scoffed, getting up and striding over anyway, though whether it was to get his own piece or to take all of it from his brother under the pretense that it was no good from him Antonio was about to see. Antonio saw Ludwig, who had been about to turn a corner and join Feliciano, stop and appear to wait the situation out.

"Funny little bruder... right?" Gilbert said, climbing on the wall with him and sitting next to him. Antonio nodded, but glanced over to Gilbert. Despite his words, he did not sound too amused.

"What's up?" he asked. Gilbert scooted closer.

"Someding's vrong vith Francis. I don't know... someding is vrong."

"Is he sick?" Antonio asked, concern washing over him quickly.

"Not dat sort of vrong... Like he's in trouble... sort of a vrong."

"If he was in trouble he'd tell us!" Antonio laughed, patting Gilbert on the shoulder. Gilbert hesitated then scowled.

"You sure?"

"Of course!" How could Gilbert even suggest such a thing? Of course Francis would tell them. What were friends for?

"I... you're right. Maybe he's just ofer-stressing himself. Maybe I'm ofer doing it. I can't vait for exams to be ofer."

"You'll do well," Antonio dropped off of the fence to break up the bickering brothers. "If it's no good... I'll get you some ice cream, Lovi!"

"The hell you will, bastard! It's too cold for ice cream!"

"We could go inside and watch a movie."

"I don't want to watch a movie!"

"What _do_ you want to do?" Lovino stared up at him, scowled, looked down, and walked off. Antonio smiled at Feliciano. "Enjoy your ice cream!"

"I will! Ludwig? Ludwig, where'd you go?"

"He's ofer dere," Gilbert was pointing out to Feliciano.

Antonio took up an easy stride to catch up with Lovino. Glancing down at his face, it was flushed a bit more than just from the cold. "You're so cute~" he exclaimed, hugging the boy. "Just like a little–"

"–don't finish that sentence!"

"–tomato!"

Lovino struggled out of his grip and walked faster, though Antonio simply caught up. "It's creepy to be compared to a food item, you know!" Lovino shot back at him, huddling deeper into his coat.

Antonio blinked a couple times, thinking about it. "Why's that?" he asked as Lovino walked up to his back door and stopped. He turned around (if possible, redder than before) and stared at him.

"B-because!" Lovino squeaked. Antonio laughed, patting him on the head as he got his hand batted away. "People eat food! I don't..."

"Oh Lovi... you don't have to worry about me eating you!" Antonio assured him. Lovino's reaction to that was another surprise. He was expecting to be insulted, or scoffed at, or shrugged off...

Lovino.

The boy stared at him as if Antonio had insulted him so well that there was no defense to put up for it. Antonio frowned, leaning over to look into his eyes. "Not that you aren't cute! I just meant–"

Lovino kissed him. Antonio's mind went blank as he tried to remember what it was he had been saying. Lovino's lips were pressed against his and he could feel the heat of the other's blush almost as if they were pressed closer. Antonio's hand lay flat on Lovino's back as he opened his mouth, letting his tongue meet very pliant lips and–

Wait. What was he doing? What had just happened? Lovino was _fourteen_!

Antonio pulled back, nearly tripping over his feet as he retreated a few steps. Lovino's eyes widened and if Antonio had been slightly more blank he probably would have run into the house. But Antonio could not let him do that. Something had just happened and he could not let Lovino run away. Plus, if Mister Vargas was in there...

_What have I done?_

"Lovino, Lovino!" He grabbed him by the arm as Lovino once again tried to fight him off.

"Lovino nothing! Let me go! Nothing happened!" Lovino shouted at him, eyes shut tightly. Antonio was trembling and he knew it, but tried to keep his hold steady nonetheless.

"_No, Lovino, por favor_... Don't go, I..." He what? What? Antonio did not know what to say he did not know what just happened! Well, he did know what just happened. Lovino kissed him, that was what had happened. And he had kissed him back, as if it were nothing.

Nothing? As if it was normal!

"What?" Lovino asked. Antonio wondered why it was that every time Lovino looked up at him like that it made him think he had just hurt him terribly. He _hated_ it when Lovino looked like that, whether Antonio himself had been the cause or not.

Antonio kissed him. _Bad idea, bad idea!_ Lovino flung his arms instantly around his neck. _What are you doing Antonio?_ Lovino opened his mouth first this time. _He's fourteen!_ Antonio let him.

_This should feel wrong... shouldn't it?_

Antonio pulled back, letting go of Lovino's arm. Lovino fidgeted in place, looking down at the ground now.

_Damage control! And fast,_ Francis' voice came to mind. Antonio agreed vehemently.

_Make sure he doesn't talk,_ Gilbert's response was. Antonio made certain to discard that thought.

_I cannot abandon him... I don't want to._ And Antonio was terrified that Lovino would misconstrue whatever he was to say next as abandonment.

Dropping to his knees, he grasped Lovino's hand, pressing his lips against it. "I will wait for you. I will wait forever for you. I promise. Oh Lovi, Lovi... let me wait for you."

Whatever Lovino had been expecting to hear next, that obviously was not it. "'_Wait_'?" Lovino demanded, pulling his hand away. "What the fuck do you mean '_wait_'?"

_Don't do this to me... No, no. He's _already_ done this to me. When did this happen?_

Antonio made himself smile, even if just a little bit. "I mean... if you feel the same when you're older... I'll be here. I will. But right now Lovino–"

"You're saying I'm too young to know what I want?" Lovino's voice rose and Antonio knew that trying to quieten would simply make him louder, so he did not even try.

"I'm saying I'm too old."

"Wha... You are four years older than me! What do you mean old?"

"Lovino, don't argue this with me," Antonio pled. "If it's the only thing I ask of you, it's to make me wait."

Lovino did not respond immediately and Antonio found himself with nothing else to say to fill the silence. "Whatever," Lovino huffed, turning and entering his house, slamming the door behind him. Leaving Antonio outside in the cold.

"Let me wait... make me wait..." Antonio repeated quietly to no one. What was he even asking? Where had this come from?

_Oh my God... it's like Francis said. There was a closer target. _I'm_ the closer target._

Antonio could not believe the words that came to mind, even though he knew with no doubts that they were absolutely right.

_I'm in love with Lovino._

When had that happened?

* * *

"_Grandmother... may I ask you something?_"

She patted at the side of her bed and Antonio walked to her side, kneeling down on the floor and resting his arms on the quilt. He took her hand in his hands, looking down at her weak grip on him.

He had never thought about any of this. Was that a good thing, or a bad thing? Was what he was doing now wrong, or right? Would people think of him kindly, or cruelly?

First, he asked the question he was certain he already knew the answer to. "_Would you love me if I fell in love with a man?_"

"_You know the answer to this,_" she smiled at him. "_I love you, no matter who you love. I love you for loving. I am happy to know you are in love._"

The fact she seemed to find no question in this kept Antonio from continuing the conversation hypothetically. "_What if... he is much younger than myself?_"

She laughed, the quiet sound still happy, still full of all the life he had ever known her to possess. "_There is nothing wrong with love. There is never anything wrong with love. It is what people do, using love as an excuse, which is wrong. The same is done with religion,_" her hand came up and caught the rosary around his neck. "_Good things are used as excuses for evils. There is nothing wrong with love._"

He loved Lovino. There was nothing wrong with that. So... had he done the right thing?

"_Promise me. You shall never be ashamed of love._"

"_I promise._" It was a promise he knew he could keep, hearing the words from her like this. If that was love, the very definition of it not amounting to the actions, then he could very well say he would never be ashamed of love.

"_You are a good man, Antonio. Lovino's good has surfaced so fast. He is lucky to have your love._"

Antonio's face broke into a smile before he could even think. Of course she knew, of course.

"_Do what you know is good. Hold to it and he will understand it as well._"

And though the next day Lovino refused to see him, Antonio did not feel the worry he had previously about it. And when he did see him, Antonio smiled and Lovino scoffed and it was like nothing had changed.

Except it had and the both of them knew it.

* * *

Summer had such a promising start. The warmth. The freedom, if just for a little longer. Antonio was not certain where he was going from here, but he was certain it would be here and he was certain he would know soon.

It was the sight of Erin, ten steps away from the porch and sobbing, which ruined it.

The sound of Roy's voice from inside of the house, booming out his words.

"Tha' blasted villan! Ai'll kill 'im. Kill 'im! 'ow dare he! Tha's my brother, _my_ brother! Wha' could'a gone through Arthur's _dim_ 'ead? Wha'? Why?"

Brian coming out to take Erin back inside. Absolutely silent other than the few words which assigned him as the leader of a search party.

And Gilbert banging at the door of an empty house with Elizaveta trying to restrain him.

"You can't hafe gone, you can't! You vould hafe told me! _**You vould hafe told me!**_"

Antonio stood there, empty.

Francis was gone. Francis and Arthur were gone. Without a word, without a sign, without anything. Had there been signs of this? How had he missed them?

Overnight the two of them had completely vanished.

"When you grow up," Antonio told Lovino, "I'll go anywhere with you."

He broke down then, unable to stop himself. Lovino's small arms were wrapped about him and Antonio could not stay standing, pressing his face into Lovino's shoulder, listening to muffled words being whispered into his ear as they sat in the middle of the road hearing the caterwaul of a broken German.

"I will go with _you_, idiot. I will go with you..."

Antonio sobbed.

* * *

"I don't know how busy your summer plans on being," Mister Vargas said to him upfront. "But I'd like to hire you for some summer work."

"Summer... work?" Antonio asked, confused.

"Lovino has gotten it into his head that he's going to forget everything by next year and demands that you make sure he doesn't," Mister Vargas continued. "Would it be too much to ask of you to do that?"

It made no sense, but Antonio was not one to argue about seeing Lovino. It would give him something to occupy his mind with. Free time was spent sitting in the garden he was not caring very well for, waiting for Gilbert to come back from the City which he had run off to for the second time in a month (always with the promise to come back, he had done so both times).

More time with Lovino would be welcomed, loved, would be–

"Of course not! Any time, Mister Vargas~" Antonio responded cheerfully.

Mister Vargas patted him on the shoulder, but then left his hand there. "Call me Marcus. We know each other well enough by now, I think. Antonio."

"Marcus," Antonio nodded.

Antonio would always remember that as the moment when he finally felt like an adult.

* * *

**Tuesday.**

"So you don't want to forget your history~?"

"Screw that, I'm bored of history."

"But you don't want to forget it over the summer...?"

"_Any_ of it you–" Lovino cleared his throat. "I don't want to forget any of this shit over summer. Can we start with anything else other than stupid history?"

Antonio smiled, pulling out a science book. "I suppose~ But we'll have to get back to history eventually."

"There's a lot of things we'll have to get back to eventually," Lovino shot back, looking annoyed at him. Antonio simply smiled back until it crossed his mind what Lovino was talking about.

Ah.

"True, true!"

After a bit more arguing on Lovino's part, they finally began to work. Antonio dreaded the moment when Lovino wanted him to help with mathematics.

"...Antonio?"

"Mm hm? What is it, Lovi?"

"...I wanna check out your garden more. This summer. Do some stuff... _maybe_. No promises or anything! Don't even think– Stop smiling!"

Antonio had to stop himself from leaning over and kissing the boy, so instead he ruffled his hair. Was this really what the tutoring was about?

"You are welcome at any time."

* * *

_Notes:_

_Writing from Antonio's POV has increasingly become one of my favourite things to do, which is why I never bothered to change back to Lovino's POV. I probably missed out on a lot because of that. Oh well. I think discovering about Lovino through Antonio's eyes is interesting._

_It took Lovino one and a half years to finally see Marcus paying Antonio for the tutoring sessions? I am almost ashamed to have written that. Talk about blind. Not that Marcus would have ever intentionally done that in front of Lovino, for the very reason of which occurred here: Lovino taking it the wrong way. Still. One and a half years. Yikes._

_Yes, Roy and warrant. He and Brian were actually in charge before Vash showed up and it was only from the kindness in Vash's heart did he keep them on to help him out. Actually, no it was not. He keeps them around because he knows they are capable of the job and he needs help, but mostly to keep an eye on them. That is another story in itself, the one where he and Heidi first show up in Hearth._

_Marcus was actually impressed by Antonio's climbing of his house. On another note, he also made certain that the upper windows could be locked as well. He may like Antonio, but that does not mean he does not place his grandsons' safety first._

_I just realized that it is a very good thing Lovino and Feliciano were raised on more than just the Italian language. You know how much more difficult things would have been for Lovino otherwise? He would never have bothered to learn anything else. Thank goodness for small mercies._

_The next one shot of which I am almost finished with happens during this same period of time and is what happened to cause Francis and Arthur to run away. I hope to have that one polished up within the next week, so keep an eye open for it!_


	8. Francis And Arthur

_Loosely based upon Shakespeare's tragedy, Romeo and Juliet._

* * *

**I Am A Montague, And Capulet Are You**

Everything began with a phone call, the day of Feliciano's birthday party.

"–_they're dead and you couldn't even think to call to tell us? My dear sister... she's gone and you never told us. I should– No, wait. I'm sorry. I am so sorry. I know this has been hard for you, I know. Still, dear heart, you should have called. We would have helped... but now we will–"_

She _knew_ how this was? She _knew_? That was such a laugh! She did not know anything. How close was she with his mother? Not! They were not terrible people, true, but he had his reasons for not calling them.

This was one of them.

* * *

It was not the time, neither was it the place to discuss this. "Will you listen to me?" Francis still asked Arthur. Arthur glared at him, but turned his expression into something more passive as he looked away.

"Make it good this time," Arthur responded, pretending to go back to his book. Francis could tell he was only pretending because his eyes did not move, they were simply burning a hole into the left page. Francis sat down next to him, leaning against the school building.

"You are the first person I will tell."

"Mhm?" Arthur prompted him. Francis tried his best to swallow around the lump in his throat.

"I may... have to return to France."

'May' was a very strange word in English. It was also a lie in this case. His aunt did not sound as if it were a _may_ at all. It was almost to be a decree. Perhaps it was his own fault, not telling her what had happened to his own parents. Afraid for this very case, none of his family knew that they had died, that he was still here, that he was here on his own. Francis did not want to leave here, however, and he knew what would happen. None of the rest of his family would want to leave France. They would want him there. And though he loved the country, the nation... He loved Hearth more.

More particularly, he loved a certain few people who lived in Hearth.

Arthur looked up at him, the shock not fake or sarcastic. "France?" Arthur exclaimed quietly. "But _why_?"

"_Mon cher_, I thought you have always told me to return to my country as it would put adequate space between us," Francis smirked. Arthur looked like he was going to slap him and that would have likely started another brawl between them.

Arthur did not though. "Shut up!" he hissed, grabbing Francis' collar. He looked like he was about to cry. Francis was not certain whether he had expected that or not, or whether it meant what he thought it did. "Why? You can't just leave!"

"Well I never said it was my own choice!" Francis retorted, pushing Arthur's hand away from him. "I'd prefer to stay here! Antonio and Gilbert live here! Elizaveta! Feliciano! The people I _want_ to be with!"

"Then don't go!" Arthur spat back. "If you'll miss _them_ so much!"

"If it were my choice–!" Francis repeated, shoving at Arthur's shoulder. The book the English boy (_man? They were adults now, were they not?_) had been reading fell off his lap.

"Don't push me!"

"Then don't grab at me!"

"Dammit, Francis!" Arthur stood up. Before Arthur could leave him though, Francis reached and wrapped his arms around him to keep him _there_. And surely a hand might have landed... ah, _there_, but it was no place his hand had not been before! "F–" Arthur hissed out between his teeth as Francis pulled him back down and into his lap.

"I don't want to leave you," he muttered into Arthur's ear as Arthur began to struggle. "I don't want to leave you. _Merde_, I want to stay with you, _mon amour_. Please understand, I love you."

"But you just said you didn't on Friday!" Arthur snarled at him. Francis buried his face into Arthur's chest so he did not have to look at him. So that Arthur could not look at _him_. So maybe he could fool him that he was not about to cry.

_It is not 'may'. I will have to go. I will have to and what can I do? I am too old for this, I should not have to be told what to do by them anymore. So I will have to fend for myself for now on._

"I love you. I want you. I so love you. _Je t'aime_. _Je t'aime, t'aime tellement._ I love you."

Arthur stopped struggling. "Bloody _hell_, Francis," he sighed. "I don't understand you at all. I can't understand. Stop that, I just don't. Please stop that..."

Against his will Francis found that Arthur had his hands on his face, pulling him up so that Francis had to look at him.

"Forget your family," Arthur said, softly but firmly. "You will stay here. Understand? You are going to stay here. I won't let you leave."

Francis could not help but laugh at that. "Won't let me? Like _you_ have any say over me..."

Arthur kissed him then, lips pressed gently against his. "You just _gave_ me say," Arthur responded, something he probably got from those books he was always reading. "We're not children anymore, Francis. You even sooner than most. You do not have to do anything they say. And by God, if you can at least keep me from hating you every week as you pride yourself in doing, I will help you with this. Will you let me help you with this?"

The funny part was when Francis used those words on Arthur, Arthur still would shoot him down. Then again, he did not want to be considered as stubborn as any of the people in that family.

Francis pulled Arthur closer again for another kiss. They kept that up until their teacher came out to tell them that was _not _appropriate and that they were supposed to be back in class as lunch was over.

He almost told her to shove it, but thankfully Arthur stopped him.

To hell if Arthur be known as more polite of the two of them!

* * *

If Francis was making any of this up, Arthur would kill him. Still, out of everything, Arthur did not think that Francis could or even would make up something so drastic in order to make a fool out of him. Not that he had not in the past, but this was a bit more then that. And they were older. Old enough not to make mistakes? No, just old enough not to make the same ones.

And Arthur had no one to talk about this with. Not that he could, even if he did, which he did not want to. It was not his place to say. Still, he had offered his help. He had offered a bit more then that, but Francis probably had not noticed. Francis always missed the obvious gestures and caught all of the subtle nuances. Or he did not. Or he did.

How had it come to this?

Arthur wanted to refuse it all, wanted to help Francis as a friend would because it would make this simpler. But... Francis had not told anyone else. The people he actually called his friends were left out of this development as of yet. Out of everyone, why had Francis told _him_?

_Bloody hell, he's made me fall for him all over again and he likely knows it._

Arthur knew he had plenty of issues, but he had been hoping that he could try and cut _this_ particular situation off. He and Francis could barely stay around each other without getting into some sort of fight.

...but Francis leaving? Not just him, but all of Hearth? Where Arthur might never see him again? That would be going too far.

"All right, spill it," Elizaveta said to him from out in the hallway where they had moved off to do their work. Arthur fiddled with the stud in his lip, looking down at the book in his lap.

"Spill?" he asked Elizaveta, hoping that being confused about it would make her think she was mistaken. Or, maybe, she was wondering what he and Francis were doing out there. God, it was as if she were trying to treat him like a girl. Talking about it was not really what he wanted to do. He wanted advice, but not to talk about it. Damn.

"My Shakespearean informed friend has yet to be able to fill out even a single question of a worksheet about one of his plays?" she said, raising an eyebrow. "What's wrong?"

Arthur nodded, rubbing his fingers up the spine of his copy of the play. "It's... not my place to say."

"Francis?"

With slight hesitation, Arthur nodded. "But not like you think!" he added immediately, before her mind could go off in that specific way she tended to go in.

"...right," she agreed slowly, uncertainly. Arthur tried to focus back on his work, despite his mind refusing to multi task. Elizaveta did not appear to have that same problem, though not as quick at answering these questions as Arthur was certain he could have been if he could have pulled his mind away from what Francis had just told him.

"_I don't want to leave you. I don't want to leave you. _Merde_, I want to stay with you, _mon amour_. Please understand, I love you."_

_Whether I believe it or not is not the question, not the problem. I can think about all of that later, after I know that he is going to stay... well, maybe not stay in Hearth. As long as he does not go all the way to France..._

"Men are pigs."

Elizaveta stared at him, lips twitching upward. Arthur rolled his eyes.

"You were probably thinking it and I am more qualified to say it than you are. We all are terrible beasts. Women are much more..."

"Simpler?" Elizaveta prompted. Arthur shook his head.

"Emotionally easier to understand?" he tried. Elizaveta was snickering now. Arthur sighed. "Never mind, forget about it."

"May I suggest something, Arthur?" she asked. Arthur shrugged. He was not certain he wanted to hear it, but it was better than fighting her off. "My father bounces psychoanalysis off on me all the time, so these are probably his words in my head. It is not the fault of men. In many cultures men are not allowed to open up their emotions as much, the habit of doing otherwise is taught from birth."

"Because of society, right?" Arthur finally opened his book. "Society tells us to teach our children this way, so we do so, and they become the new members of society. A downward spiral."

"Well... not _precisely_..." Elizaveta frowned, as if she was trying to think what her father would suggest. "Still, that is not _always_ the case."

"That explains me at the least," Arthur looked up at the ceiling, letting his head roll back on his shoulders before he diverted his eyes toward Elizaveta. "I was raised by my brothers. Roy and Brian would have probably beat the crap out of me if I was anything less than... erm, whatever they call it. Roy keeps telling me we're Scottish, Brian tells me we're Irish, I only remember London until I was seven, and Erin says that mum was half Irish half Scottish and dad was half Welsh half English and we are just confusing... But they think... if I was anything less than a _man_, I suppose."

"I don't know about that," Elizaveta said thoughtfully. "You make perfect sense to me, Arthur."

It was unnerving to hear so, but Arthur did not comment. Still, it helped him strengthen his resolve. He would help Francis, but only as a friend. Whatever was there between them could wait. Or go away. Or something.

"...'_Wisely and slow; they stumble that run fast'_..." Elizaveta recited the words.

Arthur paid no attention to those words.

* * *

Arthur stuck around with Elizaveta after class, as she waited for him to pack up so they could head over to the Vargas residency. She had shown him both of the presents she had gotten for the brothers, each chosen with such care Arthur almost wanted to set the presents he got aside and just leave because it made him feel as if he had not spent much time thinking about it.

Which was true, he had not. Elizaveta unknowingly rubbing it in his face was not helping though.

Still, Feliciano was ecstatic when they arrived. He was ecstatic when everyone arrived and Arthur wondered when his energy would run out, if not today then at which point in his life would he suddenly have no energy to speak of.

Arthur left Elizaveta to hug Feliciano, the both of them bouncing energy off of each other, and heading over to where Ludwig appeared to be trying to melt out of existence.

"Long day?" he asked.

"You hafe no idea," Ludwig responded, looking bored.

Arthur wondered where Ludwig and Feliciano had any similarities and why they were such good friends. Oh well.

It took thirty minutes for the room to become crowded. Arthur spoke a bit with Mister Vargas, though not for too long as he appeared to be busy trying to blackmail Mister Beilschmidt with something and Arthur figured he was probably in the way.

He spoke for a bit with Tino as well before Arthur decided he would find himself a corner which best to watch the humour unroll. Feliciano's parties were always hilarious and it always seemed to end with Ludwig wanting to vanish for one reason or another (either because of Feliciano or because Gilbert did something which made him want to pretend not to be related to him, though with that Arthur could empathize).

Which was when someone grabbed his hand.

"'_If I profane with my unworthiest hand t__his holy shrine, the gentle sin is this: my lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand to smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss_'."

Arthur stared at Francis, rather surprised he had it memorized. Despite himself, he found himself smirking. "'_Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, which mannerly devotion shows in this. For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, and palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss_'."

Francis paused, probably not expecting Arthur to respond so quickly. Then again, what did he expect? Arthur knew this play inside and out. And he knew where Francis was heading with this. "'_Have not... saints lips, and holy palmers too_?'"

Arthur was trying very hard not to laugh now. He should stop before this got too far. Nevertheless, he continued. "'_Aye, pilgrim, lips that they must use'_–"

Francis cut him off with a kiss. He protested for a moment, but realized he was more irritated that he had been cut off than the fact the other was kissing him. When Francis pulled away, Arthur glared at him. Francis smiled. "'_Thus from my lips, by thine, my sin is purged_'."

"You skipped four lines," Arthur pointed out.

"True," Francis nodded. "I think Romeo and Juliet wasted a lot of time."

"Please Francis," Arthur shook his head. "I'm still... still thrown off from what you told me earlier."

"I noticed. I wanted to apologize. Maybe I shouldn't have–"

"Have what?" Arthur hissed. "Told me? Too late!" Not to say also that Arthur would not want Francis to take that back. He wanted to know this, he did not want to have been left out of this. "...how have you managed up until now?"

His question was tentative. Francis had managed to live on his own without his parents in the same place he had been living when they were alive. Still living in Hearth would not be a surprise, but in that house? No job?

Francis stayed quiet for a while and when he spoke the words were barely given a voice. "I took _maman_'s clients on e-mail. They think I am her."

"What?" Arthur nearly exclaimed, but quieted himself instantly. "Francis! You can't just _pretend_ to be a lawyer!" The other fidgeted. "You are old enough that... you know how long you could be put away for?"

"I know," Francis responded stiffly. "It's why I'm not going to keep it up forever. It always was temporary, Arthur. I'm not an idiot."

"I beg to differ!" Arthur shot back.

They glared at each other, which was when Gilbert came in, asking for Mister Vargas to convince Antonio to come down and not kill himself. Francis went right after Gilbert (and plenty of others), leaving Arthur to try and cool his temper.

He was not concerned about Antonio. Antonio, Gilbert, _and_ Francis always did things that would likely kill themselves when they thought they were being cool. It was the simple things... those were the times when they began complaining that something was wrong. Like children, honestly.

_Inside... there are still children. We are still children. The innocent children beneath the shells our caregivers gave us at birth._

The part of them still unaffected by society.

_But Francis..._ His mind retreated back to the subject, trying to mold it into something so that Arthur would have control once again. So that there would be nothing to worry about. Arthur _hated_ having no control.

_I am going to have to ask Roy and Brian._

* * *

Francis did not want to tell them.

There were plenty of reasons why, but as he did not have to explain himself to anyone there was no point in considering each of the reasons. He did not have to think beyond the fact that he did not want to worry them. He needed help, yes, but the less amount of people who knew about what was going on the better. This would work out somehow.

Yet he found himself zoning out of Antonio's long ramble about Lovino and Gilbert's responses, trying to considering what he had done to himself just to stay here with them. And should he have told Arthur? Why had he told Arthur? Out of all people...

"Did you have fun at the party, Francis?" Antonio asked. It was his name finally being said that made Francis look over toward the both of them.

He needed to act better than this. In not telling them, they would begin to worry anyway! Francis did not want that to happen. "I suppose," he responded. "I'm sorry, I'm just tired. I should stop butchering your fun, _oui_?"

"Dude, you are a dead veight," Gilbert retorted. Francis smiled wryly at him. _You have no idea my friend, no idea at all._

It was best he leave right now. "Give my apologies to your grandmother, Antonio," Francis said as he stood up, waving at the both of them before excusing himself.

"Get some rest!" Francis heard Antonio call after him.

Just his luck though, he was not going home to rest, but to finish getting rid of all the evidence of the forgery he had committed since his parents' deaths. It was all he could do before to make everything seem normal, to lie to the authorities about his representation and ability to stay where he was, but now...

Francis' head swam. He was not aware when he had gotten this deep, but there was no way out now. What had he done? Just to stay in Hearth?

_I don't know. Oh I do not know. The last thing I wanted then was change. But now... now! What do I want? What should I do?_

And the two people he confided most everything else in... he had told nothing. And Arthur, the one person he had probably lied to the most, told the truth to the most, done everything to... he had practically told everything to the other day. Everything he had kept from him, from everyone, for two years.

* * *

"_My dear sister... she's gone and you never told us. I should–"_

_Should what, _tante_? What?_

* * *

Francis spent hours pondering the question, elbow deep in paperwork that had nothing to do with studying for finals. Midnight was when he had finally changed his focus. He still had to graduate, he had to do well enough for that. He had to... had to...

_I can't think! I can't think!_

He was too tired to even burst into tears. Rubbing his eyes, he flipped through to the end of his literature book and wondered why he had even cared to take this class in the first place.

The doorbell rang.

Francis did not even consider having pretended to already have gone to bed. The thought crossed his mind after he had reached the door and had begun to open it, but not a moment before.

"Arthur?"

"I've been an idiot," Arthur said, the words near biting from his lips. He looked behind him, then at the ground. "I... can I speak with you?"

Francis stood there for a while, unable to think of anything to say, before he finally waved Arthur inward. Arthur came in, dropping his coat over the back of a chair as Francis closed the door. When he had done that, he turned to see Arthur looking at him with distress.

"My brothers know."

That did register. "What?" he asked, trying to keep his anger in check. Arthur bit at his lower lip, the metal there clicking against his teeth.

"Brian and Roy were very young when they brought Erin and I here! I thought that they would be able to help, at least tell me how they had managed while having to take care of the two of us! I didn't even bring you up, but Roy could tell. I don't know... he just knew it was about you. I didn't say anything! Please believe me!"

Francis was either too tired currently or of the entire situation to be angry. He sat down in a chair, rubbing at his forehead. "I was asking for it by telling you in the first place, I suppose."

"You '_suppose_'?" Arthur hissed at him, though he hesitated instead of continuing to retort. "Francis, I just want to help you. I thought I could get something out of them if I simply acted curious to them. But..."

"How did they react?" Francis smirked, rather interested. By Arthur's current mood he assumed they did not take it well.

"Brian started yelling... and Roy..." Arthur stopped, shrugging helplessly. "He doesn't want me having anything more to do with you."

"Brian started yelling?" He would have thought it to be the other way around. Then again, he could never quite tell with those two.

"I don't think he ever got over walking in and seeing you shagging me," Arthur responded, voice stiff. Francis grinned

"You were very loud, you know!"

"What?" Arthur scoffed, shaking his head. "_You_ were the loud one! Pervert!"

Francis laughed, rubbing the back of his neck. Arthur did not say anything more and Francis noted that he was likely waiting for Francis' response. He was no longer as tired as he had been. Sitting forward, he leaned his arms on to his legs. "It's all right, Arthur. What will they do? Likely contact my aunt. I'm already trying to figure out what to do about her, so there is no change there. I believe I do not have to worry about that until after exams."

"Don't worry about it...?" Arthur said, voice quiet. "Damn you. Of course I worry. You know I do, you made it so, so don't you dare tell me not to!"

What had he done? "Very well. In either case, you should still go home."

Arthur did not move, still looking at him with those angry eyes. Francis stood up and walked up to Arthur, pressing him against the wall gently.

"Go home, Arthur. _'Tempt not a desperate man'_."

Arthur blinked, anger dissipating. "That isn't the correct usage, unless you are about to kill me."

"I hate this play and you know it," Francis snorted, kissing him. Arthur kissed him back without any hesitation. "Come to bed with me?"

"Who's tempting who?" Arthur asked, eyebrow raised. "That's not what I–"

Francis kissed him again.

"You just asked me to go home."

"You argued with Roy over me... he'll know you are here," Francis pointed out. Arthur looked surprised.

"Why... How would he know I am here?"

"Because you are stubborn," Francis commented, pressing kisses down his neck. "If you defied him, then why not go all the way? That is why you came here..." And Roy likely knew it. "Either prove him wrong and leave, or make the most out of his finding you here."

Arthur rested his forehead against the side of Francis' face. "I came here to tell you what happened, nothing more. Not only because I hate being told what to do."

"In that way... we are alike, both hating being told what we should do," Francis responded as he placed his hand on Arthur's hip.

"...I'm not protesting," Arthur smirked.

"I know. It's why we are only standing here, throwing words at each other."

"_I_ know. It's what keeps my tongue in check."

There was something terribly wrong with this and Francis wondered if Arthur was as addicted to this game of run-around as he was. Even now that no one else was involved in their games, they still had them. This was how in love he was, so he would bend himself in half for Arthur's amusement.

At the very least he knew that Arthur did not want him to leave.

"I'm going home," Arthur said. So Francis did not let him leave.

* * *

_Why do I lie?_

"Vhat's going on? You'fe been out of it for a vhile Francis. You sick?"

Perhaps Francis was not as good at pretending as he prided himself on being. Or perhaps he had simply reached his limit, played the same roll for too long. Trying to appease all parties at the same time so that he could have what he wanted behind all of their backs.

It was almost funny, what it dwindled down to him wanting. At first he had hidden everything for himself. Now he hid everything in hopes he could keep Arthur this time, somehow.

"I've been studying for exams, which you _should_ be doing," Francis pointed out, shoving the eraser of his pencil into Gilbert's ear. Gilbert scoffed, pulling his head away from the intrusion.

"I hafe! Ant who do you go to for help vith your math, huh? Who?"

"Actually, I have been doing that all on my own," Francis said slyly, appraising Gilbert's response. "You're only good at angles, degrees... that sort of things. What about derivatives?"

"Who vill efer use dose dings?" Gilbert asked, taking Francis' history book a flipping through the pages. "Paper still on de Var of de Roses?"

"Your paper still on Fredrick I?" Francis retorted, with a nod on the correctness of Gilbert's question.

"Vhy vould I change it? Dere are fascinating people in history after all!"

"Then I don't see why having an event with many people would be bad."

Gilbert did not say anything immediately and Francis went back to his work. "You're avoiding de question."

"What question?" Francis asked, absentmindedly.

"I'm not a _complete_ idiot," Gilbert grabbed the pencil out of his hand. Francis quickly looked up toward him. "Vhat is vrong?"

_I don't want you to know_. "Nothing," Francis shrugged, letting confusion rise to his expression. "Is something supposed to be... Gilbert?"

"N... nah. Noding. Nefer mind." Gilbert handed him back his pencil.

_How long can I keep this up?_

"Ready for our literature exam?"

"Is _that_ what is next?" Francis asked in shock, glancing up from his chemistry book at Antonio. Antonio nodded and Francis scrambled for his play book.

"We already _had_ chemistry," Antonio reminded him, picking the science book up. Francis thought about it, then realized that he had. He had thought he had done rather well at that exam too. Then they had the practical and Berwald had come in with the supplies their teacher had sent for, surprising Elizaveta and causing her station to catch on fire.

How had he forgotten that?

"Are you really stressing out about this so much?" Antonio asked. "You shouldn't be! You know you do well at tests! This is the last things we have to do for this school, but that does not make it far more important than everything else we've done this year~!"

"Yes... _yes_. Of course," Francis nodded, staring at words which were not making too much sense to him. "I don't know, 'Toni. I suppose I'm over analyzing the importance of it..."

"Not that it isn't important," Antonio went on to say. Francis let gravity drop his book in his lap as he glared at his friend. "Being stressed over it just isn't going to help! Neither is last minute studying! I heard that–"

"Thanks, but I don't want to hear what you've heard," Francis retorted. "I'd rather get back to my last minute studying."

"Okay~" Antonio smiled, sitting next to him. Francis looked back at his notes as Antonio said more. "Do you really think I got the point of that last math lecture? I don't–"

"Antonio!" Francis shouted, staring at him with surprise. "I thought you said stressing over any of this was unhelpful?"

"But it's math!" Antonio exclaimed. "Math hates me!"

"Math can't hate you, it's a concept." Francis rolled his eyes before he focused them downward. "Bother Gilbert if you're worried about your math, I think he wants to show off how much he '_gets it_' this year."

He perused Romeo's death twice before Antonio spoke again.

"We worry about you."

Francis patted him on the shoulder. "I'll be sure to tell you when there's something to worry about, _mon ami_."

He was tired, but this would be solved. There would be nothing to worry about.

The one thing Francis could say for certain was that he would never return to France by someone else's will.

_I'm so tired..._

* * *

"Are ye doin' yer 'omework?"

"What do you think?" Arthur retorted harshly. Which he should not have done, admittedly. Talking back to his brothers never seemed to get him anywhere. "You don't have to watch me like a hawk, Roy. What do you think I'm going to do?"

"Somethin' stupid," Roy admitted, bringing over a chair and sitting next to him. Arthur focused more on his work, trying to give an air of concentration that would make him go away. "Lemme give ye some advice, Arthur. Listen o' ignore at yer own discretion."

"Advice about what?" Arthur asked absently. "You've never worried about my grades before, but I can promise ye I'll be passing everythin' with flying colours. I only have history an' mathematics left."

"This isn't 'bout school."

_Damn. I knew it._

"Look a' me."

Keeping a stiff upper lip, Arthur set down his pencil, turning to look at his brother. "Yes?" he asked as gently as he could. If this was about Francis... he did not need to hear it. It was his own fault, yes, but he did not need to hear it. If only he had not complained about the other previously, if only his brothers had not found out about any of their many relationships...

"Stop sneakin' off ta Francis."

"What do ye–"

"Dunnae treat me like an ejiit!" Roy snapped. Arthur snapped his jaw shut. "Ai know yer goin', don't bo'er ta lie 'bout it."

"Thank ye fer the advice," Arthur responded, turning back to his desk. It was all he could do to not say anything else, not shake with anger. He knew better now. This was _his_ life. He did not need Roy telling him what he should or should not do. Roy rested a hand on his shoulder.

"This'll end in 'eartbreak, Arthur. Ye're gonna fall apart. Ai cannae let ye do this."

And he left. Arthur stared at the wall.

_But you're wrong. I _love_ him. I know this now._ He had not told Francis this yet, but he supposed there was time for that, right? He did not want to rush through this, not like before when he had thought it was a mistake and... and...

_Just because it hasn't worked before doesn't mean... it doesn't mean... I just was not ready! I'm ready now! I'm not a child anymore!_

"Oh... I told him... not to bother you..." Erin's voice came from the doorway. Arthur kept his head down on the desk where he had hit it, feeling Erin's light grip rubbing his shoulders.

"I dunnae understand," Arthur muttered. "I should know what I want. I should know, not him. Why does 'e think tha' I cannae make my own decision?"

"He doesn't... think that," Erin responded, forehead resting against the back of Arthur's neck. "He jist... has had more life experience. So... he is lending you some o' his knowledge... He loves you. We all do."

"An' this is wha' he thinks is right?"

"Only with... as open as you've been... with him..." Erin nodded, pulling away. Arthur remembered the day he was oh so honest with all of them. They were the people he would return to for anything.

Was what Roy was telling him right?

_No!_

"'_Then I defy you, stars!_'" Arthur whispered to himself.

He did not know what he was going to do next, but he knew it was going to be _his_ decision. No one else. Not his brothers', not Francis'. His.

* * *

Arthur was sitting outside of the store, opening up some packaged food. Francis did not go to him immediately, simply watched him. The sense of relief that Francis thought he would feel by the start of summer had not come. His aunt had called him again and once more he had let it go to the message machine. Throughout the week of exams Francis had not seen much of anyone else. Not that no one else was busy, they all were studying. So was he. Plus other things.

"How did your tests go?" Francis asked Arthur, collapsing next to him. "I did well, I... I haven't seen you in a few days." There he had it, Francis could not pretend to be talking about anything else. Arthur looked up at him, pressing a chocolate to his lips. Francis opened them, letting Arthur place it on his tongue.

"I've been thinking. Looking."

"Thinking? You?" Francis smirked, speaking around the chocolate which was melting like heaven on his tongue. Arthur returned the look, not bothered by the teasing words.

Arthur placed another chocolate against his lips, not putting it in his mouth. "I needed space to think. I still need space to think."

Francis swallowed to keep from choking on his chocolate. "_Quoi_?"

"From my brothers," Arthur continued, licking at the chocolate with the tip of his tongue. Francis tried his best to keep all of his attention on what Arthur was saying, but it was difficult with the other doing that with the sweet in his hand. "They want what's best for me, I know... but they don't know what's best for me. And for as long as I stay around them I don't think I will either."

Now Francis could not pay attention to Arthur's tongue for the life of him. "You're leaving Hearth." It was not a question, it was simply what Francis realized Arthur meant. Arthur stuck the chocolate in his mouth, chewed and swallowed before speaking again.

"I'm going to go to college. I've been wondering lately what to do with myself, but now that I think about it I remember what I've wanted to be for such a long time. A teacher! I will teach children, I will teach them anything! My mind will be open, so open, and they will learn everything that I couldn't, everything that my brothers made certain I could never understand!"

"You're leaving Hearth," Francis repeated helplessly. Arthur looked toward him sadly, then took his hand.

"I'll keep in touch."

"You're leaving."

Arthur sighed, pressing the back of Francis' hand to his cheek. "I do love you, Francis. I do. But I need to become something first. I need to do these things for myself. I'll come back a better person."

No, he would come back a _different_ person. Whether better or not... Francis did not know, could not say. Neither could Arthur. Arthur wanted to leave. Francis could not fault him for wanting to take his own life in his hands, that was what Francis had been doing for a while now himself, but with more illegality.

Arthur needed to do this. Francis understood.

But Francis needed Arthur.

"I'll come with you."

Arthur startled. "Francis, you have your own problems to deal with! You can't just pile on _me_ with them!"

Francis brushed Arthur's hair back from his ear and pressed his lips against it, whispering. "Nonsense, _mon cher_. I have completed my lies to my mother's clients, they are safely on their way. The problem I have to deal with is simply that of my family who refuse to leave me alone though I am old enough to be where I would like. If we keep quiet where we are going, they will not have to know and I will be through with them!"

"But Brian and Roy..." Arthur began as Francis kissed him. Arthur either sighed and moaned into his mouth before pulling away. "If you go with me, they will tell."

"Then I'll deal with it," Francis shook his head. Honestly, it was as if Arthur was trying to get rid of him! But Francis knew better. The hold Arthur had on his wrist told him that Arthur did not want to be rid of him. Not one bit.

"Unless I don't tell them."

Now it was Francis who was startled. "_Arthur_..."

"If I tell them I am going it will take months before they decide I am ready to go," Arthur retorted, stiffening. "I go on my own terms!"

"Of course you do."

"When I want!"

"Always."

"..._I_ will choose!"

"Meet me tonight near the station." Arthur did not speak again, simply staring at him. Francis leaned into him once more, pressing kisses against his neck. "We will go, won't look back."

"But..." Arthur swallowed, the motion with Francis' lips against it nearly driving him wild. "Hearth. You wanted to stay here. Gilbert, Antonio, Feliciano, Eliza..."

"_Mon Dieu_, Arthur. What do I have to do to prove myself to you?"

"This is proving yourself to me?" Arthur squawked, pushing Francis' face away from his neck. "We've gone through this! Bloody hell, Francis!"

"I am sick and tired of playing this game," Francis spoke, pushing Arthur on to his back. Arthur gaped at him, the bag of his chocolates falling to the ground. "We'll start from scratch! Right now, you and I! No more referring to the past, to what has not worked! I will go with you and you will go to school and become a teacher and I will make certain you can do it!"

Arthur stared up at him, almost in what Francis thought was awe.

"...Arthur?"

"Kiss me."

Francis kissed him.

That was a yes. Francis would not accept anything else.

* * *

Arthur's heart pounded in his chest, his adrenaline keeping him awake from that moment until two days later where he and Francis lay in bed in a hotel and the rush finally leaving him.

_We thought this through well enough... didn't we?_

They had to have... it was such a big decision.

_There is no looking back now. We'll make it. We will._

* * *

"**This day's black fate on more days doth depend:**

**This but begins the woe others must end."**

* * *

_Notes:_

_For anyone who thinks they have found their soul mate and will do anything to be with them, please remember your family and friends. They may not understand it as you want them to (though you should still try!), but it does not mean they do not care._

_Again, a story very, very loosely based on something else. Obviously this was _not_ about two teenagers who marry each other less than twenty four hours after they meet, by their own whims. It is just about two teenagers. Who eventually marry. There is a party in there and a night scene where one person is at another's house when they should not be. Actually, I believe this one is much more closely based on the play than any of the other's I have used as titles for Hearth stories. Imagine that!_

_Teenagers are really emotional. I guess that is why it is the teenage population which is known for running off from their responsibilities. Then again, who states what is a responsibility to whom? Then **again**, this was probably a decision Francis should not have made until he had rested well, or a decision that Arthur should have made until he had relaxed. Then again, most decision are made spur of the moment. It is how people live._

_My heart nearly broke when I wrote that Francis loved Hearth. It is sad how quickly that changed._

_And yes, Arthur has a lip piercing. Along with a few other piercings. Terrible, is it not? It makes me laugh._

_Arthur also tended to slip into a different sort of accent while talking with his siblings back in the day. That was a habit he hammered out of himself quite efficiently while he was away._


	9. Everyone Is Creepy In Hearth

_Pre Comedy of Errors._

* * *

**The Job**

At first he had simply been asked. The young man who had arrived in Hearth and with difficulty had tried to make a place for himself in the small town, without having many communicative skills.

Arthur had asked him first. "What do you do?"

Kiku had fumbled and said he was a programmer of something specific that he did not know how to translate. Arthur had not pushed it. But Arthur's son had, of course.

"You're short for a grown up person!" Alfred said loudly. Kiku stared down at him.

"You are short for a small person," Kiku retorted immediately. Alfred stared at him with wide eyes, then grinned.

"_**Mom**_!"

"Would it _kill_ you to call me dad?" Arthur demanded. Alfred immediately seemed to forget what he wanted his 'mother' for and grabbed Kiku by the hand.

"You're my friend now! We're going to play cowboys! But just cowboys, apparently playing about the Indians is bad or somethin'."

"...uwah?"

Needless to say, Alfred was not concerned about finding out about his job immediately. Neither was he very interested when he found out it had to do with computers. Kiku found this strange.

"I have never known a child to not like computers," he confided to Ludwig. Ludwig shrugged.

"Good luck comparing dat child to _anyone_," he told Kiku. Ludwig had only known Alfred for a year, but he was pretty sure he had never been like that. Or that anyone he had ever known had been like that. Maybe Feliciano was a close enough comparison, but only in the fact Ludwig did not think Feliciano could be compared to anyone either. "Vhat do you program?" he asked Kiku.

Kiku hesitated, mouth silently running over English words that he obviously had not learned too long before arriving. "I program... computer programs... for a company to utilize in organization... ah..."

Ludwig nodded and did not push the matter.

"I invented the computer!" Yong Soo exclaimed.

Kiku did not ask.

* * *

All of these things had little to do with anyone knowing what Kiku did, but it was the most anyone knew. Years passed and no one questioned it.

Then iMarcus was born. Or created. Whichever word was most appropriate. Alfred and Feliciano were the ones who pushed it this time, Alfred back for Christmas during his first year at University.

"He made a _computer _who acts more like my grandpa then my grandpa does!"

"That's stupid," Lovino snorted.

"What sort of job would have him making something like that?" Alfred asked.

"What're you both doing talking about it_ here_?" Lovino demanded. Both of them glanced over.

"Hiding from Arthur, he wants me to cut my hair."

"It looks like it could use a trim..." Feliciano shrugged. Alfred glared at him. Lovino snickered.

"And why's that?" Alfred demanded, pushing a hand back through the hair of his mullet protectively. "Fuck, you both are just as bad as he is!"

The Italians protested that similarity and the subject was changed once more. Or, more correctly, returned to the previous path of conversation.

"He said he worked as some sort of programmer for some company," Alfred reiterated. Feliciano '_ve~d_' and Lovino ignored them. "And didn't Ludwig hear him say once it was for organizing information?"

"Yeah, but Kiku couldn't explain it well," Feliciano nodded. "But hey! How is organizational stuff important to making computers that act like other people?"

"Steal their identities?" Lovino grumbled. He was ignored.

"Maybe he works for the government!" Alfred announced his guess. Lovino scoffed. Feliciano stared at him with wide eyes.

"The government?"

"The government!"

"Feliciano, stop bringing Alfred to our house," Lovino griped, leaving the room.

They ignored him. "What do you think he does for the government?" Feliciano asked, enthralled by the idea. Alfred thought about it.

"Robots. Like Transformers. And iMarcus was just the first step to giving them the wills to control themselves!"

"But that's horrible!" Feliciano wailed, gripping at Alfred's arm.

"No it's not, they're good guys! I mean, if Kiku makes them, what could go wrong?"

"I don't want a robot that acts like me!"

Which was a good point, Alfred decided. He did not want a large robot that acted anything like Feliciano either. Other than making a lot of pasta, it would probably freak out as soon as it realized it could not eat the pasta. Alfred thought about it.

"We're getting ahead of ourselves here."

"We are?"

"I think so," Alfred nodded. "First of all, no one's asked for a while, right? Damn! It's been a long time! Back when Kiku wasn't so good with his English. He's a lot better now! Let's just ask him!"

"Okay!" Feliciano exclaimed happily, no longer as worried about a robot being made of him. Even if that was what Kiku was doing, he was certainly take in mind a request if Feliciano asked it of him!

* * *

"Am I making Transformers for the government?" Kiku deadpanned.

"In disguise," Alfred clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth, giving Kiku a thumbs up. Kiku could only be grateful for the sanity of Ludwig and Gilbert, who were _both_ trying not to laugh. It was a strange sight, something that made the both of them giggle, but Feliciano and Alfred seemed to have easily made it possible.

"No," Kiku responded.

Unfortunately, this public conversation opened up to the entire town that none of them really knew what he was doing. And Kiku, the private man he was, was not answering.

Secrets in Hearth?

No one was going to stand for that!

* * *

Matthias came up with the first idea. In a conversation with Feliks, which had him berating the way Alfred went about asking Kiku (_"Like, oh my God! You don't ask him like that!_), Matthias was sure he had come up with a different angle. An angle that would work.

"Berwald, you should ask Kiku what his job is!"

Berwald thought about it. Berwald did not see why Kiku would answer him if he had not answered Feliciano and Alfred. Berwald also did not see why not. It was not as if he was too curious, but if people knew then he would not have to hear about it anymore. "'ll right."

Tino, on the other hand, knew exactly what Matthias wanted. "No you will not," he said to Berwald, as firmly as he could. "It is not our business, Berwald."

Berwald shrugged. "'ll right."

"Hey!" Matthias exclaimed. Tino glared at him. "That's cheating!"

Tino was rather smug with himself. More than it not being their business, he was not going to let Berwald be used as intimidation against Kiku. It had taken long enough for people as it was to be less scared of him and that was not going to be undone by something stupid.

"Why don't you try asking him?" Tino asked. "Intimidate him with your own means."

"Berwald _is_ my own means," Matthias shrugged.

"You've always said you're more intimidating than he is." Meanwhile, Berwald was trying to figure out what place he had in this conversation, because they obviously could not have been talking about him as he was not very intimidating.

"Well... in a certain way," Matthias shrugged again. "In my own way."

Either way, that way had failed.

* * *

"I'll follow him around! He's got to let it slip at some point!" Yong Soo suggested.

People were left to wonder whether they were more curious than they were against stalking. It did not take long for most people to realize they _were_ more curious. It also did not take any time for them to simply know that if Yong Soo tried stalking Kiku they would not find out anything. So he was going to be a diversion.

"Don't dink of it as stalking," Gilbert explained. "Dink of it as tracking. For de greater good. Dings like dat."

Angus Walker swallowed. He _was_ curious, but this seemed a little wrong.

"Ve're counting on you, new kid! So's Kat, I heard dat she's curious about Kiku's job too," Gilbert nudged his side with his elbow.

Angus swallowed again and steeled himself for _tracking_ Kiku.

Yong Soo was an excellent distraction, though no one had told Yong Soo that was what he was. Yong Soo still thought he was the one trailing Kiku. Kiku had been walking to the store when he had stopped, looked over his shoulder, shook his head, and kept going.

Congratulating himself, Yong Soo continued after him. Only to be hit in the head with a rock.

"Uwah? I... Yong Soo? What were you... Are you all right?"

"Fine," Yong Soo responded, head spinning.

Angus almost thought of calling the doctor when he remembered that the closest doctor was in the City and that Yong Soo appeared to have a head made of steel. The Korean wandered off.

Angus continued after Kiku, but with even more caution than he had previously had. _Treat him like a wild animal... yeah, I can do that._

Two days and then it was over.

"What are you doing, пан Walker?"

Angus stopped and stood up straight instantly, wheeling about to see Katyusha. How had she sneaked up on him? "Ah... 'ello miss," he tipped his hat.

"What are you doing?" she asked, innocently and full of curiosity.

"Takin' a walk."

"Oh!" she nodded, before thinking about it. "You... you walk very quietly."

"So as not to disturb the wildlife."

"Of course!" she exclaimed. "пан Walker, you are very considerate!"

"Please miss, call me Angus,"Angus smiled.

Kat was very happy to call him Angus. Just as happy as she was oblivious to the fact Angus had completely given up doing as Gilbert had bid of him.

* * *

"Damn," Gilbert sighed.

"Serfes you right," Ludwig retorted, who had been completely against the idea of someone following Kiku around. At least, only against it enough that he just did not want to know about it. He had not told Kiku, after all, and that gave everyone the impression that as long as Ludwig did not see it he did not mind too much.

"We should stop," Yong Soo said, much to everyone's surprise who was currently in the store. "He could be making responsive sex dolls! Best to leave that be."

"Aru!" Yao glared at Yong Soo with disgust. "Of course Kiku does not do disgusting things like that!"

"He _is_ Japanese– _ow_!" Yong Soo exclaimed as Yao hit him with a loaf of bread. The '_ow_' was because he was hit in the eye.

"Kiku's job is not about sex dolls!"

"You know what his job is?" Antonio asked, leaning over the counter from where he was situated next to Tino – their conversation having been interrupted for this.

"Of course, aru," Yao rolled his eyes. "Kiku weeds my yard."

Everyone stared. "I... never pegged him as the outdoors type," Elizaveta said, unbelieving of the truth of the statement.

"He couldn't afford dat car!" Gilbert exclaimed. Yao rolled his eyes again.

"Of course he couldn't!" Yao was in belief he was surrounded by more idiots than he usually was. "He doesn't weed my yard! That is Maddox's job, aru."

"Wait, wha'?" Roy waved a hand in front of himself, trying to keep everyone else from saying anything and interrupting him as he gathered his tongue. "Ye 'ad me arrest 'im fer bein' in yer yard last week!"

"Because he was not doing his job," Yao sniffed.

"Ai got 'im fer tresspassin'. None o' my business if 'e is na weedin' yer garden."

Everyone relaxed and went back to being curious, as Yao did not really know what Kiku did for a living. "Kiku couldn't have afforded to eat on what Yao pays," Muhammad laughed. Yao glared.

Maddox slowly put his hands to his stomache. "I... have not eaten... since last Wednesday."

"That's a lie," Arthur frowned. Maddox collapsed on the ground of the store. Everyone went back to what they were doing. When the isle he was in was empty, Maddox got to his feet and left the area. Then he climbed up a building and entered into someone's window.

No one saw him for three days.

* * *

"It's not any of our business."

"Why not?" Alfred asked.

"It's just not. Ant vhy are you both in my house?"

"Vhat if it vas illegal?" Gilbert pointed out to his brother. Ludwig could not believe the ludicrous words that were coming out of his brother's mouth. One would think he would be used to them by now, but no.

"I don't think Kiku does illegal things," Alfred said firmly. It would have to be pushed in his face before he believed it.

"He definitely does not," Ludwig agreed.

"Unless he got in financial trouble ant de mob is making him do stuff for dem ant if he doesn't dey'll kill him!"

"Ve don't have a mob in Hearth," Ludwig narrowed his eyes.

"He goes to de City in dat car of his, occasionally," Gilbert continued on his route of thinking.

Alfred frowned, not liking where this was going. "I'm not hiding in the trunk of his car. Kiku doesn't do illegal things."

"How do you know?" Gilbert pressed on, dropping the former sentence as he doubted anyone would want to be trapped for hours in the trunk of anything. "He's von't say! Dat means _someding_."

"Dat it is _not_ our business," Ludwig restated. "Gilbert, you need to stop inviting Alfred to my house."

"Ve'll take de train ant rent a car to drife dere, den follow his car. He vas going dere dis next Monday, right Al?"

"..._yeah_..." Alfred responded, slightly uncertain. He was not certain whether his uncertainty was because he did not like the plan, or because he could not be involved with it because summer was over and he was returning to med school this weekend. "Tell me how that goes."

His uncertainty really was because of the latter.

* * *

"Dis is excellent!"

"Dis is stupid..."

"Shut up."

Ludwig was not sure how he got roped into this idea. Nevertheless, they were here and waiting for Kiku's car to arrive in the City, having a general idea as to when he had left from a call from Antonio, of whom had also been roped into the plot by Gilbert in someway.

He would have asked Kiku to forgive him, but he was rather hoping that Kiku would never know. Hopefully they would figure out what Kiku was doing here (whether having anything to do with his job or not) and people would finally _stop_ asking.

"Here he is! Go after him!"

Ludwig sighed, pulling his hat further down on his head and trailing Kiku's car.

Kiku was almost amused by how obviously the driver of the car behind him did not want to be following him. He turned into a narrow one way street.

Ludwig turned the car into a narrow one way street to see nothing. "Fuck, vhere'd he go!" Gilbert exclaimed, glancing about for anything that could explain why Kiku's car was suddenly gone.

"Oh no, ve lost him."

"Vould it kill you not to sound sarcastic?"

"Probably."

Another failed attempt.

* * *

Eduard (while not telling anyone so that no one would think of him as condoning this) hooked himself in to be able to eavesdrop on Kiku's phone.

Immediately he lost power.

As soon as his power came back, he got an e-mail.

**Nice try! Try and tell Kiku what iLudo and I have done and we'll have to say why we did it~! 3**

Eduard was thoroughly weirded out.

* * *

Feliciano tried to peek inside of his house by first picking the lock of the front door, just to be able to see if he could see _anything_ out while Kiku was not expecting company. It was the first lock he could not pick.

Maddox politely asked iLudovicus to let him in. iLudovicus declined.

Maddox frowned. After all, no one was around to really see it.

And the entire town finally seemed to settle into the fact that Kiku's mysterious job was normally mysterious.

Kiku breathed a sigh of relief.

* * *

iLudovicus was beginning to think the real reason he had been created was so that Kiku did not have to worry about anyone coming in (as Kiku seemed plenty able of defending himself against the questions outside of the house), more than for the fact Kiku had wanted to create a program like he and iMarcus and examine the usages they had.

Not that he cared.

Not like he _could_ care. He was a computer program, after all.

If keeping Kiku's secrets was something to do, he would do it. Plus, it was amusing to watch the attempts of the other residents of Hearth try and figure it out.

Not like he _could_ be amused...

* * *

_Notes:_

_Alfred used to hate computers and television as things that would keep him inside and not running around. It is almost pointless to say that he quickly changed his mind before he got much older than he was in the beginning of this chapter._

_Yong Soo actually has 'invented' what he says he has. But only of the things he actually owns. He did make his own computer. And his own television. And his own bathtub. But he makes them _better_. Or tries to. I would not get in that bathtub, if I were you. Or try and look at any mirror in his house._

_I actually think Alfred could make a mullet look good. My two cents on the matter._

_Angus moved in four years before the events of MAAE. So along with Roderich, Vash, Heidi, Toris, and Matthew, he is one of the new kids._

_People actually _stopped_ trying to figure out about Kiku's job only when Vash was in charge of the law. So for two years the poor man had to deal with it. Not all at once, of course. Not all in a row. But yikes. Proof that, even as humans, the characters of Hetalia are all terrible people._

_I was either high or tired while writing this. As I do not take drugs, either I was drugged unknowingly or tired knowingly. Far be it that_ I_ leave out possibilities._


	10. Even Maddox Is Bothered By This

**Everyone Tends To Assume**

"_Wait! Where is he going?"_

"_I would expect back to his house."_

"_But... weren't you two supposed to kiss?"_

"_Brother, have you seen Maddox? Was he here? I just passed him on the road and... and I almost thought he was smiling!"_

"_I have no idea."_

* * *

"You... didn't... oh! I am so sorry! I thought you already knew!"

Vash should have figured that was what had happened. Still, he was relieved all the same now that Heidi had said it. "It is not any of my business, I am sorry." He patted her on the arm as she tried to regain a hold on her blush.

"But it is! It just has not... been a big deal, I suppose." She placed her hands into her lap.

"There is no rush." Goodness knew that _he_ certainly had not rushed into anything like that. He had already gone thru the mental stress of trying to accept the fact she was old enough for this. Really, there was nothing more for him to do other than support her decisions. And make certain that the people she was spending time with were not secretly criminals or had anything horrific in their pasts. That was all that was left for him.

He had basically raised her. He supposed this was how Arthur was feeling as Alfred wanted to move out. Not that Heidi was moving out! No, not for a long time. Not a problem.

Vash was beginning to wonder if he was a little overprotective. Just a little bit?

"Is that... you did not think I had a crush on Maddox, did you?" Heidi asked suddenly. Vash found himself rather stricken. Clearing his throat, he quickly shook his head.

"Of course not! That is ridiculous."

"Good," Heidi sighed, relaxing. "Even if I was not... even if I was straight, I would never ever look twice at your boyfriend! Whether we spend a lot of time together or not!"

"Boyfriend?" Vash asked, confused. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, if I was into men," Heidi clarified cheerfully, "you would not have to worry about whoever your boyfriend was being on the list of people I was attracted to! I would never want us to be in that situation!"

"No," Vash said blankly. "I meant how did you get to the word boyfriend from Maddox?"

Heidi blinked up at him and then covered her mouth again. "Oh! I am sorry! I thought– You are Maddox _aren't_ going out?"

Vash was pretty certain his brain had just broke.

* * *

"I told you to pick up those tacks this morning," Arthur said as Maddox continued to collect the tacks off of the chairs before someone actually sat in them. It was a bit embarrassing, having to clean this up. He was so used to people just knowing about these things and so he could get rid of them when no one was paying attention. But now Matthew was going to come over...

He supposed it gave him something to do. Something to keep himself from smiling. Maddox had never had such an impulse to smile in his life. It was weird.

"It slipped my mind, I was busy making out with Vash," he lied, wondering how many times he had given that excuse to Arthur. Well, he was going to have to think of a new one when that started happening, because it would not be a funny if it was the truth.

"I am so glad you do that over there," Arthur responded, sipping at his tea, waiting for whatever was in the oven to be done cooking. Maddox would have looked, but he rather liked his eyes in his face.

"We always think of your comfort," Maddox bantered back. Arthur glanced over his shoulder.

"I cannot believe you are so settled while Alfred is still being such a git."

"Pardon?" Maddox asked, nearly piercing a finger with a tack.

"It isn't my place, but I find it remarkable that you have managed to get under Vash's skin and that Alfred cannot even see a mutual attraction when it stares him in the face. It would make me think he had failed chemistry if _I_ had not graded his papers."

Maddox was trying to get what Arthur was meaning by this. There was the obvious, but as the obvious could not possibly be right... "How long do you think I have been going out with Vash, Dad?"

"God forbid that I start counting things like that," Arthur snorted.

It did not matter. It gave Maddox his answer. Arthur thought he and Vash were already dating.

He retreated into the basement.

* * *

"Zwingli, why are you here?"

Vash stood in the doorway, staring at the cake before he had managed to tear his attention away from it. His first impression was that it was a danger to whoever was in the vicinity. Then he remembered it was cake. What real harm could it do?

"What was your impression of Maddox when you came to Hearth?"

Roderich stared at him and (much to Vash's annoyance) appeared rather amused. "You really want my opinion on your boyfriend?"

And that was enough of that. Vash left the inn as quickly as possible.

* * *

"What do you mean, _start_ going out with Vash?" Muhammad asked him incredulously.

Well, it was either ask him or Yao. Maddox was afraid that Yao's reaction would be some sort of contained explosion, whether it was affirmative or confused. Muhammad was always the safer bet between the both of them.

"As in beginning, not continuing," Maddox continued, the straightforwardness of this rather awkward to him. But he needed an answer.

Muhammad rose an eyebrow. "So you are only _now_ boyfriends? Better not tell Yao, he'll make a _big_ deal out of it. He always thought he had missed it."

Even Yao had thought they were?

Maddox left Muhammad's house as quickly has possible.

* * *

Maddox hid his bag of plastic fire ants under his firecrackers when Vash came down into his room. The basement. Whatever anyone wanted to call it. He and Alfred called it his base of operations, because it annoyed Arthur.

"Everyone thinks we are already an item," Vash said immediately, exasperated. Maddox froze in place before turning around to look at him.

"They think we are joking about just getting together."

"Precisely."

They both stood there. Maddox's mind worked overtime. He was not amused. So he would have to make himself amused.

"If we started making out right now, we could always pretend this has been going on for a long time," Maddox suggested.

Vash narrowed his eyes and returned up the stairs. Maddox went back to putting the rest of the plastic insects into the plastic bag which he would hide in his sleeve. For future use against Francis, whenever it worked out.

Everyone already thought it had happened. Okay.

Maddox found himself very irritated that he had had the biggest reaction out of everyone during this entire ordeal.

* * *

_Notes:_

_I lied, there was another mention of fire ants. Then again, this did happen before the wedding. So it does not count, right?_

_A personal success for me is to make Maddox genuinely irritated. It is always so hard to do._


	11. Inside Their Minds

**Phantom Of The Arcade**

Alfred had just graduated medical school. He was a doctor, he was going to stay in Hearth permanently, and everything was about to be awesome.

"Stop stealing my catchphrase!" Gilbert caught him in a headlock.

"It's not yours, I can say I'm as awesome as I want!" Alfred protested, wiggling out.

"Ve need beer to celebrate!" Gilbert changed the subject. Alfred was patting off the front of his shirt when he paused.

"Ah... no."

"Vhat?"

"Beer and celebration is a bad combo. That usually implies over-consumption and is unhealthy–"

"You are definitely _not_ awesome," Gilbert pointed at him, frowning.

"Get out of my house!" Ludwig shouted at them.

Alfred immediately found himself in a group all by himself: someone who did not want to drink in excess. It struck him immediately that Hearth was full of alcoholics.

Every. Single. Person.

"Alfred-san, what are you doing in my pantry?" He shuffled about, knowing he would not get an answer if he actually said what he was doing. "iLudovicus, what is Alfred doing in my pantry?"

"Looking for alcohol, I believe."

"Alfred! Why on earth would you–" Kiku began, pulling at Alfred's arm. The game up, Alfred let Kiku pull him out of the pantry.

"Do you drink, Kiku?" he asked. Kiku stared.

"Why are you–"

"Yes or no, do you drink?"

Kiku hesitated, then nodded. "On occasion, I do like... w-why do you look so disappointed?"

"That better be on rare occasions," Alfred pouted. "Like, really rare."

After continuing to stare at him for a little longer, Kiku let go of his arm and took a step back, as if considering him. "What is this about, Alfred?"

"Every single adult in Hearth is an alcoholic!"

"Alfred, you are an adult."

"Why–" Alfred cut himself off. "Why yes. Yes I am. But I'm not an alcoholic. Alcohol is only good in moderation. I don't know why I never realized how much people drink here!"

"I always assumed it was a by product of living in such a small town away from civilization," Kiku admitted. Alfred tried not to laugh at that, but failed miserably. He covered his mouth as he snickered, watching as Kiku's eyes narrowed. He was rather adorable (if not subtly irritated) when he did that.

Alfred quickly pushed that thought aside. "Show me how much you drink."

That did not appear to improve Kiku's mood. "...excuse me, Alfred?"

"On your occasion, I want to see how much you drink!" Alfred announced. "Please humour me! You're my friend and now I'm worried!"

For a moment, Alfred did not think Kiku would do it. So he thought of a deal breaker.

"Then I'll unlock the arcade~"

It had been a while. And ever since Vash came to Hearth, Alfred did not have to worry about anyone breaking into that particular building. So Kiku would not have been there since the last time Alfred had let him. And that had been a while.

Kiku struggled with the decision for a while. Alfred left and made himself a sandwich.

* * *

"Wow, those cups are really small."

Kiku smiled. "I told you I did not drink much." If that was how Alfred was thinking about this, Kiku really would not have to worry about it. He was not going to drink much in the first place, being inebriated around Alfred would probably be a bad idea. But if Alfred did not know how potent sake was, then oh well.

To make certain that Alfred would not forget about his promise to open the arcade (and that Kiku after drinking would not just be relieved at Alfred dropping the subject and forgetting about it himself), they were already there. Kiku had judged he would have two or three cups and just turn in then so they could play some games.

Alfred would be happy, Kiku would be happy, and most importantly Alfred would no longer have an excuse to worry (at him, at least) about alcohol.

Maybe a majority did drink here? So? Kiku did not see the problem with it Alfred did. Then again, Alfred had spent several years getting told how everything could kill him, likely. Kiku already knew everything could kill him. He just assumed it. It was part of his job. No point in freaking out about death, he had too many other things to freak out about.

"Sake taste different then beers and wine... how?"

"Ah... it would be difficult to describe. Take a taste."

Alfred did not seem to have a problem with having a little sip of it, although he did not seem to like it much. "Okay, I can tell the difference." Kiku smiled, finishing his cup and trying not to think of it as an indirect kiss.

Oh. It was, was it not? Kiku downed the next one to forget about that. Three cups later and they had abandoned the alcohol to play Mortal Kombat.

"You could've had me there!"

"I am playing nice."

"Hey!"

Kiku covered a laugh, as Alfred no longer looked quite as pleased to have won. "Again?" he quested, as if Alfred needed the rematch to make up for Kiku's words. Which he probably did. Alfred was strange like that.

"DDR," Alfred said immediately. Kiku brightened immediately. As Yong Soo was nowhere around, they both had a pretty good shot at winning this game. He had no idea why he had been so reluctant to play it in the first place.

"I programmed some new songs," Kiku said excitedly, rushing over to where he had set his laptop when they had arrived.

"_Thriller_? Tell me you did _Thriller_! Kiku, you promised me you'd do _Thriller_~" Alfred pestered him. Kiku nearly jumped out of his skin when Alfred grabbed him from behind, engulfing him in a hug.

When _had_ he gotten so big? Kiku could remember when he could pick Alfred up. If he had bothered. That had only happened on the rare occasion. When he needed Alfred to leave and he had managed to catch up with the child in order to evict him.

Kiku tried to shake the heat from his face. "Yes I did, Alfred-san. Please..." Kiku shifted out of his grip as he went over to the platform to connect his program. Alfred was looking over his shoulder again.

"Oh wow! Did you really?"

Kiku sighed. "I just said I did, Alfred. Would you please–"

"No!" Alfred shook his head, pointing at the screen. Kiku tried to tell what he was pointing at but could not quite tell because Alfred's finger was in the way. "That one! You are _awesome_ Kiku!"

Kiku peered at the screen, but got the idea when Alfred burst into the first phrase.

"_In sleep he sang to me... In dreams he came~_"

Kiku balked at the utter shamelessness Alfred could sing without any music. Not that he was bad or anything (for Alfred, Kiku always found himself surprised), but Kiku could never manage that. Not without karaoke.

"_That voice which calls to me, and speaks my name~_ Oh, come on Kiku. Join me!"

"I–I do not think so," Kiku shook his head.

He kept shaking it, hoping Alfred would catch on, but as usual Alfred seemed to miss it. Or ignore it. Alfred kept going. Kiku could not help but giggle.

"_Sing once again with me..._"

"There you go Kiku!"

Which was when they heard a crash. Kiku nearly jumped out of his skin, clutching at his chest. Alfred glanced about with concern, but who was the cause of the noise was obvious as Natalia ran past them and out the front door.

The both of them stared.

"When'd she get in?" Alfred asked.

Kiku had no idea, but when he pressed play on his laptop and the game started up, Alfred seemed to mostly forget about Natalia's entrance.

_I think I am in love with this lunatic._

It certainly would explain why Kiku was preferring to spend time with him rather than go and fix a problem. Or maybe that was the alcohol. Was he not a little old for this? Erm... old for Alfred?

_I am not certain. Does that even matter here?_

Kiku was plenty happy leaving those thoughts for another time and continue to play their games right now.

* * *

_Notes:_

_Definitely were not expecting that, were you? I thought not._

_What is with Alfred being in people's houses that do not want him there? Good question._

_Being slightly inebriated certainly helps convince one to start singing at random times. So I hear. I have no personal experience on the matter. Oh well._

_Why was Natalia there? Good question, probably to be brought up at a later date. And if you are confused (which you should be), the answer will be in chapter thirteen of '_All's Fine That Ends Okay_'.__ Promise  
_

_Next chapter will be the Bad Friends Trio's letters. For the next one-shots, I have a new poll up again. There are some new options which I came up with, so some fresh ideas for everyone to pick their poison from. Have fun voting!_


	12. Friends

_A sample of letters between Francis, Antonio, and Gilbert._

_The '...' are because I did not want to write out the entire letters. So I just wrote out pieces of each of them and the ellipses annotate when there is a lot more that I did not actually write. I hope no one is disappointed with this.

* * *

_

**Dear**

_Dear Gilbert, dear Antonio,_

_If I could apologize for what I most likely put you through, I would. To possibly come up with words to describe why it was that I took the actions I did, again I would. Yet none of this would matter. What is done is done. This letter I write is hoping to find you well and that you will bother to read all of it before ripping it to shreds._

_Arthur and I have made it to Toronto. I think we will actually be staying put here. Our own apartment! In such a large city! While I remember Paris, and how we have gone to the City often enough, it has been so long that I have actually stayed in such a large city it was almost overwhelming at first..._

_...I have been considering career choices, as I know the three of us were putting off as it seemed so ridiculous at the time to rush on about it. We had all the time in the world then, did we not? If your humour has returned by this point in my letter I think you might find it at least chuckle worthy that I am looking into law, as my mother did. My defense is that Canadian law will be much different than Hearth law. And it is interpretation, interpretation! We interpreted law as we wanted for such a long time and got in trouble for it, I think it is about time I can decide when it really is worthy of a punishment or not and help that along..._

_...Either I continue to write and write to you both or I send this so you can actually read all of this. I will drop this letter off at the post office tomorrow when I take Arthur to his morning classes._

_Respond as you will. I do not expect forgiveness any time soon, but I do hope to hear back from the both of you at least once._

_=Francis=

* * *

_

_Dear Francis,_

_I'll have you know Gilbert and I would like to beat you senseless. How dare you leave us like that! Obviously _nothing_ was going through your tiny little mind. If you had taken it more slowly you would have thought twice about it, wouldn't you? You would have realized you can't just run away from everything you son of a bitch._

_How are you?_

_You did not write too much about yourself, simply your surroundings. Where you are and why you left so suddenly is not what I really want to know. Gilbert would be writing right now if he had lasted long enough to read your letter. He'll be back, I know. He can write his own letter if he wants. If possible his temper has gotten worse. Especially if someone mentions you. Did I tell you how much pain you are going to be in when we see you again?_

_Hearth. I can't say too much has really changed here since you've been gone. I thought it had, but trying to explain has made me realize just how little really has..._

_...Gilbert has started smoking. I don't know why. I've never heard Ludwig so loud as when he tackles his brother to try and wrest them from our Gilbert's grasp. It's almost funny to watch as Ludwig usually wins. He's much stronger than Gilbert. I don't know quite when that happened. He grew up quite quickly._

_Speaking of growing up, if only you could see Lovino! Lovino..._

_...and Lovino also..._

_...then we..._

_...Lovino has also..._

_...My hand is cramping up, so I think I will wrap this letter up now. A lot more happened in Hearth than I had thought. Surprise, surprise~!_

_Please do not spend too much time before responding to me, my friend._

_~Antonio~

* * *

_

_Antonio probably wrote you a thousand pages about Lovino, didn't he?_

_You deserve not to know any more then that, bastard._

_-Gilbert-

* * *

_

_Gilbert,_

_Did you really just send me a letter with two sentences?_

_=Francis=

* * *

_

_Did you just send me one?_

_-Gilbert-

* * *

_

_Six words?_

_=Francis=

* * *

_

_Two._

_-Gilbert-

* * *

_

_...Francis, may I suggest you be the bigger man here? You are never going to get Gilbert to write anything to you if you continue to be silly about this! As funny as it is, Gilbert won't back off from being stubborn about this. I have to hear him complain about it all the time, when he isn't ranting about it to Elizaveta. Make him feel guilty about it and maybe you can reconcile!..._

_~Antonio~

* * *

_

_...This coming from the man who said he was going to beat me up the next time he saw me? Oh, how classic of you Antonio!..._

_=Francis=

* * *

_

_Dear Gilbert,_

_Antonio just wrote to me saying that I should be the bigger man and make you feel guilty about not writing anything substantial to me. I just wanted you to know that._

_=Francis=

* * *

_

_Yo Fran,_

_Hey, thanks for telling me that. I totally paid him back for that. You would have loved the look on his face. It was still the same clueless expression that it usually is, but I could tell he was bothered. Maybe if the pictures turn up and I find my camera I'll send you some prints._

_Antonio has been reading your letters to me. Out loud. Actually, he has been screaming them up at my window in the middle of the night, so it is not like I am missing out on your exploits. Neither is Ludwig, for that matter. He is getting really annoyed at Antonio. I think he'd actually do something about it too, but for the fact little Feli usually manages to keep him calm. The little weirdo shows up at the middle of the night as well to bother my brother, or to sleep with him. As in just sleep, not like how you would, you sick bastard. Not that it makes too much sense anyway. I know it drives Ludwig up the wall. And the old man turns a blind eye to it. Weird, right? I don't think Mister Marcus minds either..._

_...I still can't believe you convinced Arthur to go with you. Or to let you go with him, or whatever it was that happened. Explain that a little more. It sounds like being out of Hearth does wonders for your relationship, if you are still together..._

_-Gilbert-

* * *

_

_...You really do not want my help in the future, do you?_

_~Antonio~

* * *

_

_...it appears I can only be on good terms with one of you at a time! How delicious is that thought! Very well, I will settle for one out of two as long as I do not permanently loose either. I suppose I deserve the occasional insult, even if I do have Arthur to give them to me and keep me in line._

_And I am surprised that is the first mention anyone has given me of little Feliciano. Antonio, you spent so much time gushing on Lovino I almost forgot he had a brother! What he would pay to hear that, hm?..._

_...I heard from Antonio that you have entered the business of repair, Gilbert. I will admit I must have laughed myself nearly sick when reading that little tidbit. After all, you repairing anything? You spent more time breaking yourself and other things when we were younger, excuse me if I have difficulty imagining something staying whole in your grip..._

_=Francis=

* * *

_

_...It is true, I laughed at him too..._

_~Antonio~

* * *

_

_...You are both asses. Fuck you Francis._

_-Gilbert-

* * *

_

_Francis,_

_...Antonio's out of town right now. He went back to Spain. You know how Julia would always return there for a visit? Well, she is not coming back._

_She died._

_I've never seen Toni so devastated. There is going to be a funeral and everything. I offered to go with, but I guess he wanted to go on his own. What would I do in Madrid anyway? Be confused, probably. It's not like he would be in the mood to translate..._

_...Just take it easy in your next letter, okay? I don't know if he'll be able to take a joke or not. I'll be a little scared if he doesn't._

_-Gilbert-

* * *

_

_Francis, I am not even certain if I want to ask if it was you. Probably because I already know. I think you scarred Lovino for life with that box and my trying to reassure him was not making it any better! I don't even want to ask!_

_~Antonio~

* * *

_

_...Also, I had no idea you could buy dildos in bulk. Nor have I ever had to pluralize dildo before. You, my friend, are almost as awesome as me._

_-Gilbert-

* * *

_

Mes amis_,_

_Red alert! You need to get back to me about this asap! If you do not, I am going to have to come up with an answer on my own and I am not certain if I can do so and not ruin everything I have worked at for the last two years..._

_...Arthur wants a child. Children! Us with any living thing? I don't even know where this came from! Certainly he has always been fond of children, I know. Maybe he has been overexposed to them with his teaching training. We are both still trying to establish our careers! There are so many reasons why this is a bad idea and I think I have tried to gloss over each of them at least once. I do not think he is listening to me. Arthur with his mind set on something...!..._

_...I need something to convince him this is a bad idea. Anything. I am running out of ideas. There is only so much time that "let me think about this" will buy me!_

_=Francis=

* * *

_

_Dear Francis,_

_Children? I thought you had written the wrong word. That just seems like a strange word to come from you or Arthur in regards to yourselves._

_I will not make this long. You do not think he will listen to your concerns about this? Are you an idiot? Just sit down and talk with the man! Even if this is something he really wants, he will likely accept that the both of you are not ready, or even if you are the only one not ready! Honestly my friend, Arthur was never the stupid one. Just say "not yet"._

_Unless you are wanting to say "never"? Is that it, Francis?_

_~Antonio~

* * *

_

_Francis,_

_Mention how that will stop the sex. You two always seemed to run on it like it was gasoline._

_-Gilbert-

* * *

_

_Francis,_

_Hey, it's been months. Where are you? How did all of that work out? You have Antonio over here thinking Arthur hit you with a chair because you said something really stupid. I told him that's ridiculous, Arthur would more likely strangle you..._

_-Gilbert-

* * *

_

_Francis?..._

_~Antonio~

* * *

_

_...Where does the time go? Marriage is such a difficult arrangement, my dearest friends. But everything is fine. It took me so long to respond because we have moved. I would go through all the details, but I find them rather boring so I will cover just the important bits..._

_=Francis=

* * *

_

_A quick note,_

_Did anyone loose a bird? Because I swear the parrot which is now trying to get into my house is Pierre. Which would be impossible. Same type, markings, all of it. Even says the same lines we taught him. But I cannot accept this as truth, Hearth is so far away._

_=Francis=

* * *

_

_...Yes, Pierre went missing last month. As he tended to always come back, I never thought twice about it. He is very good at fending for himself after all!..._

_~Antonio~

* * *

_

_...Pierre's always been one fucking weird bird..._

_-Gilbert-

* * *

_

"He hasn't replaced us, has he?"

"What?" Antonio asked as he watched Gilbert pace around the room. "Would you sit back down? I can't practice like this!"

"My hair's fine!" Gilbert retorted. "I'll cut it out, I don't need you–"Antonio smiled, standing up and grabbing Gilbert by the wrist, yanking him back into the chair. "Ow!"

"There. Sit," Antonio said. "Now... what were you saying?"

"Francis has not replaced us," Gilbert said sulkily. Antonio blinked a few times, trying to imagine it.

"How is that even possible?"

"As best friends, stupid," Gilbert snorted.

"I don't doubt he has other friends, I wouldn't wish him not to," Antonio said blankly, wondering what was really going through Gilbert's mind because he was not making much sense.

"But ve're his _best_ friends," Gilbert restated. Antonio yanked at the gum in his hair and Gilbert winced. "Vatch it!"

"I _am_," Antonio responded. "Francis is busy with his life in big cities. He hasn't replaced us~! He just has more things to juggle. Like we do. You're so silly~!"

Gilbert did not respond. Antonio finally got the gum out of his hair.

"He's not telling us someding."

_That_ Antonio could agree with. Years were passing.

* * *

"**Oh, I was hoping to actually catch you on the phone. I know it's expensive... but letters take so long. I would prefer paying long distance fees than loose track of you–" **_Click._

"**Antonio?"**

"**Arthur~! It's been a long time, hasn't it?"**

"**My God, it really has. Francis isn't here right now, he has a job interview."**

"**Really?"**

"**Yes, he sent off his letter about it yesterday, I think. I'd say more, but he would probably rather tell you himself."**

"**It doesn't mean we can't talk!"**

"**No, of course not. How are you?..."

* * *

**

_Dear Erin,_

_I feel so stupid now not for have kept in touch. My anger, my irritation, my negative feelings toward what Brian and Roy were asking of me, kept telling me... None of that should have kept me from saying something before now. I was so childish to let so much time pass before this._

_Now that I am, I do not know what to say. More than anyone I want to ask you to forgive me. You never held me back and I made you suffer just as much as anyone. I cannot even imagine how to make it up to you. Forgiveness seems so far out of the equation by this point._

_And Roy was right. By God he was right. Where do I even start to explain this? The beginning? No, there is too much..._

_{Arthur}

* * *

_

_I won't even get into it with you, little brother._

_I read the letter, because Erin is incapable of reading it. You know why? Because the bloody git is now an alcoholic. Lives and breathes on the stuff. More so than anyone else I've ever known. Brian and I have tried, tried, to help, but nothing works. Erin just boomerangs back, just does worse without it. We've given up._

**section crossed out–**_Happy now? You put Erin in a depression and now probably have killed_–**section crossed out**

_Left Francis, have you? I told you so. He cheated on you? I TOLD YOU SO. Frankly I'm surprised you lasted so long._

_Don't even bother keeping in contact. You obviously don't even care about anyone here but Erin and Erin's not writing you anything._

_[Roy]

* * *

_

_Dear..._

_If not fo_**-blurred-**_ust admit I would murder myself now. How could I have let him go? How could this have happ_**-blurred-**_me? I thought I had fixed myse_

Page ripped to shreds. Pen tapping against table. Eyes looking over toward sleeping child.

"_Je ne suis pas dévasté. Je t'ai toi, mon petit Matthieu. Je suppose nous l'avons bien cherch__é. Tu es assez pour moi... comment Arthur rirait si il m'entendait dire ça!_"

More tears.

_Dear Antonio and Gilbert,_

_Arthur left me today. And I let him go. I guess we just do not work..._

"What have I done?"

* * *

The letter did not make much sense to Antonio or Gilbert. When Antonio called Francis, the Frenchman's words still did not make much sense. A week later and Francis did not even want to talk about it.

"What do we do?" Antonio asked Gilbert. Gilbert stared at him incredulously.

"The f... Hell if I know, Antonio. Hell. If. I. Know."

_Arthur... what did you do? What did _you_ do, Francis?

* * *

_

_Two Years Later...

* * *

_

It was a sunny day. The day dared to look like it was supposed to be happy. Arthur did not know why it would have made him feel better if the sky was pouring. Alfred shifted in his arms, but did not wake up. Thank God. Arthur did not know what he would do if Alfred woke up right now. Have to explain all over again why everything they owned was gone? Explaining why people did bad things... it was just so hard.

Biting his lower lip so hard it turned white, Arthur knocked on the door.

Silence.

_Why am I here?_

The door opened. Arthur felt like such a different person when staring at Roy. Roy, whose eyes went from shock from his presence to shock from Alfred's.

"I need help." His words were shakier than he could ever remember them being. Was Roy going to turn him out now? Arthur would not blame him, he would not, he would not... _Please just listen to me before you do, please, please, please give me a chance to talk. I won't care after that, I won't care..._

"Ai told ye tha' ye were gonna fall apart."

Arthur sobbed as Roy brought him inside.

* * *

"Should we tell him?"

Gilbert looked up from the phone. Antonio was standing near the window, looking at him expectantly. "Tell him... about Arthur?"

Antonio hesitated, then nodded. Gilbert stared back down at the phone

–"_don't tell him I'm here." arthur wipes away tears. "don't tell him anything. please gilbert. please. i'll do anything, just don't tell francis i've come back. promise me you won't..."_–

"It's not any of his business anymore," Gilbert responded wearily. _What did you do to him, my friend? What did you do... Why didn't you tell us you actually did adopt that kid?_

With that in mind, he would instead pick up a pen.

* * *

_Notes:_

_That went from funny to depressing _way_ too fast.__  
_

"Je ne suis pas dévasté. Je t'ai toi, mon petit Matthieu. Je suppose nous l'avons bien cherché. Tu es assez pour moi... comment Arthur rirait si il m'entendait dire ça!" = _"I am not devastated. I have you, Matthieu. I suppose we had this coming. You are enough for me... how Arthur would laugh if he heard me say that!"_

_Some of the translation was my own work and some I had to use a translator to figure out (especially that last sentence). If anyone could correct me, that would be wonderful! And "nous l'avons bien cherché" turned out to be a saying which was the most similar to the English "we had this coming" according to some French person on a forum._

_Letters documenting a period of six and a half years, then two years after._

_Letters, not e-mails. Because it was during the time when that was actually a common form of keeping in touch. Even if it was not near twenty years before the CoE, Francis is terrible with computers, Gilbert is terrible with the Internet, and Antonio is lazy and has not bothered figuring it out yet._

_Marcus does not mind Feliciano sleeping with Ludwig because he would used to do the same thing with Ludo. And Sadiq. And Muhammad. And Yao. _And_ Nefertiti and Helene, though with those two he had a slightly different agenda. And the six would always tend to beat him up after that._

_And again... there would be a lot more letters, but I would rather leave this period of time open and not have to think about everything that happened then. I think you got the point I was trying to make... which was that Francis is a great liar and he even gets away with it to his friends about important things. Actually, that was not the main point, but it was probably one of them._

_I thought I would like to mention that out of the three Francis is the oldest, then Gilbert, then Antonio. I always place Gilbert's birthday in January because the Kingdom of Prussia was declared by Frederick I on January 18, 1701. Not because I am a Januarier. Not at all. After all, that is not even a word~!_

_Just to clarify: no, Francis never mentioned they adopted (the situation of which will likely be mentioned in 'All's Fine'), nor told them what had happened that split the both of them up. As you can probably recall in 'Comedy of Errors', neither Arthur nor Francis seemed to care much about it. By that point. Anymore. What time does for/to us all._

_I wonder if now people will finally want to read about when Francis got out of jail? That has been one of the options most ignored... Anyway, next chapter will be much more light-hearted. It be the request I got fr__om ' b l u e y 3 0 6 '. F__inally I will introduce Taiwan and Singapore into the Hearth cast! The antics of Xiu, Fatimah, Yong Soo, and Maddox when they decide Yao is a funny joke._


	13. Just Not Like This

_Fatimah is 17, Xiu is 15, Yong Soo is 19, and Maddox is 13. Ten years before present times...

* * *

_

**Sometimes He Did Say It**

There was a part of Fatimah which was happy she was returning to Singapore. Four years away was such a long time. So far away. But while there was that enthusiasm, there was also plenty of her which was dreading her departure of Hearth.

"What am I going to do there? It'll be boring compared to Hearth!" Fatimah demanded, holding Maddox to her as if he were a stuffed animal. Maddox did not approve, but there was no escaping the iron grip which reminded him of Yao.

"Help," Maddox said, quiet voice swallowed up by Fatimah's sleeves.

"You could stay here!" Yong Soo said immediately. Xiu looked hesitant.

"Don't you miss your family?"

"Yeah, but it is not as if we do not talk all the time still anyway," Fatimah shrugged. "I just... never _did_ as much with them as I have done here. Sure I'm learning, but I'm having fun."

"Help?" Maddox repeated.

"This is not 'goodbye forever'," Xiu reminded her. "You're just getting to go home. You can always come back."

"_Xiu_," Yong Soo poked at her. "Stop talking."

"No," she stuck her tongue out at him, quickly retracting it when he pretended he was about to lick it. Both her and Fatimah went '_ew_', referring to Yong Soo in just every word known how he was a dirty old man. Or a dirty young man, neither of the girls were that picky. Maddox, thoroughly annoyed, finally slipped out of Fatimah's grip and moved over behind Xiu, grabbing his stuffed red panda and wrapping its tail around himself five times.

"It just doesn't seem like four years!" Fatimah exclaimed.

She had said that two weeks ago. Fatimah had to hide her tears because she was not the type of girl who cried, _goddammit!_

She was not ready to go.

Still, what was there to do about it? Fatimah was going home. She had to tell everyone, arrange everything... all of this stuff which was getting in the way with her enjoying her last month in Hearth. Not that Hearth did not seem to have its own plans in making certain she still enjoyed herself.

"Oh hey there Fati! A little help?"

"Get out of it yourself," Fatimah said with a grin, watching as Yong Soo dangled upside down. "You knew Maddox put that there, why'd you step in it?"

"I didn't!" Yong Soo protested. "I totally didn't! It was Young Sil!"

Fatimah did not believe him because Yong Soo always blamed his mistakes on his older brother, just as Young Sil blamed his mistakes on his younger brother. It was a waste of time to believe everything they said about each other.

"I'll tell Xiu you couldn't make it," she said as she began to walk toward the Vargas restaurant. Yong Soo struggled more and hit his face into the tree. Fatimah decided she would probably return soon to make certain he had gotten down. Yong Soo with all of the blood rushed to his head was a bad thing, his brain would not be able to take it.

* * *

"Seven days," Xiu sighed, staring down at her plate. She had not touched any of her food, while Fatimah had basically inhaled hers. Xiu had long since decided on commenting. "Time just flies by when something big is about to happen."

"No it doesn't!" Fatimah laughed, waving it off with the hand which was not attached to the arm propping her head up on the table. "Time does not work like that. I think you just feel it's going fast because summer is going by quickly and you have your last year of school coming up."

Xiu frowned. She actually had not been thinking about that. It made it worse. "I'm not cut out for school."

"Are you kidding?" Fatimah blinked. "With your good marks?"

"Memorization and regurgitation, that's what I'm good at."

"I beg to differ," Fatimah snorted. Then again, it was a little annoying to be told that by the younger girl who was better at mathematics than she. And Fatimah was _good_ with math.

"Maybe not... but none of it _interests_ me very much," Xiu continued. "You know that. I want to focus on something for my future."

"What is with the sudden interest in the future?" Fatimah asked, confused. "You have plenty of time to figure this out."

"No. Not really."

"I can't believe you're going to be gone!" Feliciano suddenly said, popping up from who knew where and nearly giving Xiu a heart attack. The younger Italian hugged Fatimah, tears streaming down his face.

"Why is everyone crying? Jeez!" Fatimah exclaimed, torn between hugging the poor man back and pushing him off. She opted for the former, because it meant she could hide her eyes in his shoulder and no one could see her blinking as quickly as she was.

"Muhammad's going to go back to being the creepy guy who stays in his house all the time except when he is bothering Yao!" Feliciano went on to say. Fatimah blinked again.

"That's true," Xiu said, the fact suddenly hitting her. "Before you showed up I did not even know he lived there." Strange, through Fatimah's staying at the man's house she had gotten used to him. As used to Muhammad as one could get. Xiu liked him a bit better than Yao. Yao was a little _too_ weird to her. Muhammad said it was because she was Chinese and did not listen when she corrected that she was from _Taiwan_. Weird.

The door opened and the three of them glanced over to see Yong Soo enter, stumbling about and missing their table by the entire length of the room and falling on his face.

"Lunch please..." he gurgled from the ground.

Xiu looked concerned, but Fatimah simply took some of the food off of her plate. Feliciano gave her another hug before going over to check on Yong Soo.

"What do _you_ want to do?" Xiu asked her. Fatimah thought about it.

"I... I'm not certain. I haven't thought past the 'going back home' part," she admitted, leaning back in her chair. "Where's Maddox? Do I have to extract him out of his house? Or out of Arthur's house?"

"How often have you had to do that lately?" Xiu asked. Fatimah opened her mouth, shut it, then thought about that as well.

"Not often. Huh... I guess I just got used to thinking of him as the introverted twerp. Alongside the extroverted twerp." Which was Alfred, of course.

"He's not really that introverted anymore," Xiu smiled, thinking back on it. "It is probably all of your fettering him out that did it."

"No," Fatimah scowled, doing her best to hide the red that suddenly stained her cheeks. "Probably because he was always a conniving brat with a cold shell."

"What are we talking about?" asked Maddox, sitting next to Xiu. Xiu had the grace to blush, but Fatimah just narrowed her eyes at him.

"None of your business, you weren't here for the beginning of it. You get to miss out, mini-me."

As usual, Maddox just stared at her and was not bothered by her attempt at antagonizing him.

"They were talking about you," Yong Soo said, crawling into the chair next to Fatimah. Both girls were about to protest when he continued. "And me."

Ah, he had not heard them then. "You wish," Fatimah shook her head.

Xiu concealed her giggles. "Just about how you both were late."

"And about how we were late!" Yong Soo went on to say. Fatimah sighed.

"That's what _she_ said!"

The four of them went quiet. Maddox's lips twitched as he lowered his head, hair covering his face. "That phrase is so _old school_, Fatimah."

"Like Yao?" Yong Soo asked.

Fatimah knew she was making a strange noise. Xiu had her mouth physically closed shut with her hands. Maddox's head disappeared below the table.

"_**That's what Yao said!**_" the four of them exclaimed before three of them burst into laughter and Maddox sunk completely under the table.

While none of them said it, for some reason their tally started there.

* * *

"Finally leaving? 'bout time. Go be annoying somevhere else."

Fatimah drew herself up to her full height, which was still seventeen centimeters too little to make any sort of impression on the German. "At least I do not have to worry about someone tainting awesome there, as no one else bothers to lie about their self-worth like _certain_ people here."

Gilbert frowned, eyes narrowing in on her. "You know vhat dis means, right?"

"Oh?" she asked, a bit sweeter now because it meant she could cover up her laughter. Gilbert was so easy to rile. Fatimah wondered when people were actually supposed to become adults in this town. She had hoped to find out.

Gilbert chose one of their many competitions, and surprise surprise, it was one of them that he had won the last time they had done it. "All-you-can-eat."

"That's what Yao said."

He hesitated. "Vhat?"

"On your tab again, Muhammad's not footing me for the Vargas' bill again," Fatimah grinned. "Unless we make Xiu cook for us again?"

"Hell no!" Gilbert shook his head. "Ve make _Ludwig_ cook for us."

"I don't want wursts," Fatimah shook her head. She did not mind them too much, but she sickened of them quickly. There was only so many of those she could eat in a row before her stomache protested. Gilbert could breathe the stuff. Which was why he won last time. It was cheating, really. "Let's get Kiku."

"Stop vith de Asian choices," Gilbert demanded, leaning over and ruffling up her hair. Immediately she protested, shoving his arm off with all the strength she could muster.

"Then you pay for everything I eat," she went back to their first choice.

"Dat's vhat Yao said."

Fatimah snorted before she could stop herself, covering her mouth and nose with her hands. It was unintentional, but she figured if she could get half the town to say this before she left she would have made her mark. A stupid mark, yes, but a mark that Maddox would have to work really hard to beat.

"I dought I heard you right," Gilbert said, leaning down to look her in the face. "Ant in context... you're really creepy, Fati. Really creepy."

"You said it!" she protested.

"You said it first!"

Someone cleared their throat and the both of them turned around. Ludwig glowered at them.

"_Vhy are you both in _my_ house?_"

"You said he invited you in!" Fatimah accused Gilbert, who simply looked smug and did not answer. Why she trusted him when it came to his brother though, she had no clue.

Once she told her own brothers about this, face-to-face, they would probably appreciate her more.

* * *

"Maddox! What are you doing in my chimney this June?"

"That is what Yao said."

Muhammad rose an eyebrow, but easily pulled Maddox out of his fireplace, absently beating off the soot on his sleeves with the back of his hand. "I bet Yao says plenty of things like that, he has you to deal with."

"I was competing with Alfred. What time is it?"

He could easily see that the time did not matter. Alfred was much louder than Maddox and it did not matter whose chimney he would have tried to climb into, someone had probably already found out he was there. Whether they removed him themselves or whether they called Arthur to tell him where his son was at did not matter. Alfred was out of running a long time ago.

"Winning time," Muhammad grinned at him. "You missed Fatimah, she's been gone all morning."

Maddox stayed quiet for a little bit before he answered. "She missed me, I was here when she left."

Muhammad laughed. "You are going to be in a talking to from Yao, young man!" he warned him cheerfully, quite willing to take Maddox himself to hear Yao scold him. Yao was absolutely terrible at scolding anyone, let alone Maddox, let alone when he knew Muhammad was in the vicinity, let alone when Muhammad made audible comments about his own speech.

"That is what Yao said."

The repeat of the earlier statement let Muhammad know that this was a phrase now and Muhammad was in the know enough to discern where it was derived. "Which one of you started it this time?" he queried.

Maddox almost looked confused, but covered the expression quickly. "Yao."

"Did he?" Muhammad laughed at the obvious lie. "How did he do that?"

"By being old."

Well, _that_ was true enough. "You know plenty well I'm older than him."

"That _is_ what Yao said." With that one stressed word, Muhammad had no doubt that Yao actually had said it. "He will not say by how much."

"Because that would admit how old he is!" Muhammad grinned again. "And you should know better! Never ask a woman her age!"

Maddox opened his mouth, seemed to forget he was about to say something as he thought about it, then looked back up at him. "That is what Yao said."

Muhammad sighed. This was getting old, fast. Unlike himself, who just felt old at the normal pace. "I know you know what you are doing, Maddox."

"That is what Yao said."

"You are annoying.

"That is what Yao said."

"Yes," Muhammad agreed, picking Maddox up by the back of his collar. "It probably is."

The next moment saw Maddox being thrown out the front door. He rolled down into the road, then turned and began to roll down the road. Muhammad watched him go.

He realized Maddox was intentionally being as annoying as possible, probably to keep him from taking him to Yao. Muhammad would have to remember to tell Yao that. It would both irritate his friend and relieve him. It was about time Maddox was able to plan ahead.

Even if it was to be even more annoying.

* * *

"What is wrong with Fatimah?" Arthur asked Xiu, the girl in question simply having collapsed on his couch.

"She won an all-you-can-eat contest against Gilbert," Xiu said, the idea obviously distasteful to her. Arthur did not think much of it either (why would Fatimah want to risk being sick for the rest of her days here?) but knew better than to find it distasteful. Rather, he found it hilarious. After all, Gilbert had lost. He might not have eaten as much, but it meant he would be in worse condition.

"She might as well pack another victory under her belt before she goes."

Xiu gave him an expressionless look, likely stating how much she disproved. Arthur ignored it however and went over to Fatimah. "What brings you to my house? Do you need anything?"

"_No_," Fatimah stated implicitly, as she always did. "Actually, we were curious about all the soot outside."

Arthur sighed, parental instincts immediately making certain he could still hear the shower upstairs. "Alfred had the bright idea to climb up some chimneys." Not that Arthur was stupid. He knew exactly who's bright idea it was. He loved Maddox, dearly, and it was nicer to see him doing things than being so introverted, but Yao needed to reign the child in just a little. It appeared he was a child of two extremes.

"Who's chimney?"

"Roy's." The bastard gave him a boost up too. Arthur was really getting sick and tired of _law enforcement_ enforcing bad behavior. How his brother's ever managed the job was becoming increasingly more sketchy. "I suppose, considering where you came from, you don't want any tea?"

A muffled laugh came from Xiu. Fatimah looked annoyed for a second. Then she said something rather odd.

"That's what Yao said."

Xiu laughed some more.

* * *

Yong Soo pointed at the house in question before Xiu could even ask what he was doing. "Look over there!"

Her eyes, having already followed his finger in the direction it was pointing, let alone needing to be told what to do with the gesture, closed for a moment as she sighed. "It is a house."

"That's what Yao said!" Yong Soo threw his hands up in the air. Xiu had been about to scold him for it, when she realized that Yao must have said that to him. "But that isn't what I'm pointing at."

"Yes, someone is moving in," Xiu shook her head, wondering how it was she was able to deal with the man one on one. At least Fatimah could hold her own with him most of the time. And Maddox... was Maddox. "I know."

"He's actually here today!"

"He... what?" Xiu gasped, standing up. "Then what are we doing here, watching his house! We should not be here!"

"Why not! We should tell him hi!"

Before Xiu could stop him, Yong Soo had gotten out of the bushes and crossed the street to the front door. Xiu was not certain who this was, nor did it really matter. She did not know if this person had even met anyone else in Hearth before, but Yong Soo was definitely not the person that anyone here would want to meet a newcomer first.

She ran after him. He was knocking on the door. Xiu shut her eyes.

And tackled him.

The door opened and the man looked out, eying his front yard with confusion. Xiu covered Yong Soo's mouth.

Then he looked down at his bushes and at the two of them. "Can I help you?"

Xiu's face burned. Quickly she got up to explain herself, welcome him, anything, but all she could do was stare at her sandals. Yong Soo got up next to her with sticks in his hair. "Hi!"

"Am I going to have to worry about kids messing up my yard?" the man asked bluntly, pulling a cigar out of his pocket and sticking it in his mouth.

"No, sir, no!" Xiu squeaked.

"That's what Yao said!"

Not only was Xiu mortified, but now she was annoyed. She was certain she rambled something about the fact she would keep an eye on Yong Soo, that Yong Soo was not really as bad as he appeared, and a general 'welcome to Hearth' before she ran off, Yong Soo's wrist firmly in hand.

Oh, she would never be able to face that man again.

* * *

"What are you doing up there?" Fatimah asked.

"That is what Yao said."

"You know you are going to overuse that joke and it will not be funny anymore," Fatimah snorted as she began climbing up the tree. She made it to a branch nearby where Maddox was sitting, watching the young teen as he stared dully out at the nearby houses. "You could come down. I..."

_I will be gone on Friday._

"I'd rather keep an eye on you," she scowled at him, reaching over to ruffle his hair. Maddox quickly scooted away out of her reach. He did not say anything, not looking at her. Fatimah found herself first paranoid, then softened. "...Maddox?"

"I had a sister once, I think," he said, awkwardly, hugging his red panda. Like how he used to be. When she had first met him, both new to Hearth. A little boy named Kong who did not want to see anyone, clinging to Yao's legs as if he were his only anchor to the world. "I like to think she was like you."

Fatimah froze, face flushed.

"...when I am feeling particularly masochistic, that is."

"I-idiot!" Fatimah exclaimed, pushing him off the branch. Maddox either was not expecting it, or did not move fast enough to catch himself. So he hit the ground. Fatimah almost was concerned, but because Maddox did not move at all, she relaxed. "Nice try, mini-me!"

He rolled away.

* * *

One water gun fight gone awry later, Yong Soo, Xiu, Fatimah, and Maddox found themselves hiding in Yao's flowers. Maddox would have climbed up the house if it had not been for Yong Soo hitting _all_ of them with water and his hair was now clinging to his eyelids. Xiu would not have been involved if Alfred had not told Gilbert that she was the one who told Fatimah to hit him in the back of the head with a stream of water. And, finally, they had lost their sanctuary in Arthur's house because they were sopping wet.

"We're going to have to do this when I come back," Fatimah said. Then, as if something had hit her, she burst into tears.

"Hey, Fati! Woah!" Yong Soo said, trying to hug her. She shoved him away.

"You're wet!"

"And now you are more wet," he pointed out, hugging her anyway. His big sleeves practically plastered themselves to her shoulders. It was so ridiculous, Fatimah was able to recover herself.

"We... will do this when you come back," Xiu said.

"Especially if it is winter," Maddox's small voice added.

"And we shoot each other with hot water!" Yong Soo agreed.

"No," Maddox continued. "Cold water. We can all die of pneumonia."

"Shush," Xiu pressed a finger against Maddox's lips. Maddox pulled back slightly, once more trying to get his hair out of his eyes so he could see.

"That is what Yao said."

"Shut _up_ Maddox," Fatimah groaned

"That is what–"

"What are the four of you talking about _in _my garden, aru?" Yao asked. The four of them look straight up at him.

"That's what you said," Maddox said.

Fatimah shot Maddox in the face with another stream of water.

* * *

"I heard you finally lost it."

Fatimah turned to look at Muhammad as she continued to struggle closing her luggage. "What?" she asked, confused. He sighed, coming over and sitting down on her bed, nothing on it. The room was so empty.

"What's wrong?"

It took her a moment to respond, snorting. "Um... I'm leaving? Do you remember that little bit of information? Like how the house is going to be very empty and quiet?"

"Don't you dare avoid the subject with me," he said in his good humor, patting the bed next to him. Sitting down next to him, she waited for what he actually meant. If she tried to guess, she would likely be so off base it would not even be funny. Four years and she had no way of knowing what Muhammad was about to talk about. "You want to go home, you do not want to go home... there is a reason about home which makes you not want to return there, not just Hearth."

Fatimah sighed.

"So spill, woman."

It was as if she was a screen. This last week, people could see right through her. Some people pretended not to, others did not even bother. It hurt when they did not though. Fatimah almost wished she had never told anyone she was leaving. If everyone had just treated her like always...

"I won't be able to speak out at home," Fatimah finally admitted. "We do not have this freedom of speech. You don't like something, deal with it."

Muhammad rose an eyebrow. "You're a smart girl. Don't _deal_. Do something about it."

Which was something she should have thought of a long time ago. Fatimah broke into a smile. "You are awesome. I almost wish you were my father."

"Oh, no you don't!" Muhammad exclaimed, but it was in his usual teasing fashion. Not that it sounded like he was teasing, but Fatimah knew well enough now. "My children don't even want me as their father. I'm terrible at it. I am much better at being the random caretaker for a girl who wasn't even supposed to be here. I like that better." She nodded.

"So do I."

"Good. It means I don't have to remind you to keep in touch. If I did, then I would have to suggest it."

Fatimah swallowed. "No sir."

"Good again! Now give me a hug."

She did so without hesitation. "You are such a sentimental old man..."

"What did you say?"

"I'm glad you liked the joke we played on old man Yao."

The Indian man chuckled, patting her on the back. "Who wouldn't like a trick played on him? And hey, I'm older than him. Watch your language."

Fatimah sighed. Oh, Muhammad was still awesome, but she was very much reminded as to why she would not really want him as her father. "That's what Yao said."

"I am serious, Fatimah."

That sentence made her grin.

Still, the next day she was on a plane and heading back to Singapore.

* * *

**Fatimah**

**You should get this e-mail immediately. Because it is the INTERNET. Not sure when you will read it, but you still have eyes I think so it will all work out for you.**

**I just wanted you to know Hóng hijacked a trip in your suitcase.**

**Take care of him.

* * *

**

Absently, Fatimah stroked the red panda's long tail.

* * *

_Notes:_

Hóng (紅)_ = bonus; popular; red; revolutionary_

_Fatimah actually was part of an exchange program, to go to school in the City, but she ended up in Hearth and stayed there under Muhammad's roof. Oh well, right? _

_This fit into Hearth so well I am slightly worried about it._

_MADDOX IS THE EXACT SAME. Well, that is not true. Nowadays Maddox thinks fast and acts slow. Back in the day Maddox acts slow because his brain was a bit slow. And he actually had some expressions. Maddox had some problems when he was younger. He also had a red panda stuffy, which was the character named Hóng that he last referred to. Xiu made it for him, but messed up on the tail and kept making it longer and longer. She pretended that was on purpose though. Maddox never knew the difference. Neither did Yao, who thought it was absolutely adorable._

_Also, he is technically still named 'Kong' at this point, as he is yet to be adopted by Arthur. He took the name about a year before this to annoy everyone. Unfortunately the only person he really annoyed was Yao, everyone else decided to conform to it._

_There is also the fact that Ludwig and Lovino are both the same in that their brother's bring people into their houses without asking. With Lovino it makes sense, he and Feliciano lived in the same house for so long. But with Ludwig, as Gilbert lives in a different house, it is really just Gilbert being an ass._

_Anyway, I hoped you liked it, ' b l u e y 3 0 6 '!_

_On another note: you people wanted Maddox after Maddox after Maddox! So the next four chapters are full of Maddox. And Vash. You guys really wanted Vash. Or Maddox. Not certain which you all like more now in Hearth. Wow._


	14. And A Hollow Victory

_Pre-CoE._

* * *

**That There Lamplight Gave Me False Hope**

It was Maddox's third strike. Today. And Vash was going to catch him today if it was the last thing he ever did. Which it would not, of course, but Vash was getting a bit desperate by this point. He wanted to teach that man a lesson. Just because Brian and Roy seemed insistent that _that_ kind of law breakage was okay did not mean Vash was ever going to agree with them.

And maybe after spending some time in a cell, the both of them would agree with him.

Not that putting Maddox in a jail cell ever seemed to help. Especially as he would put himself in it sometimes without Vash knowing, simply for the sake of being troublesome.

The definition of catching, today of all days, was not only being in the same vicinity as Maddox. Neither was it being right next to him. Vash did not consider having a fistful of his shirt in his hand even good enough.

No. He was going to cuff him. In some particularly tight cuffs that Maddox would not be able to slip out of. Prior attempts had all been in preparation for this. He was going to cuff Maddox and keep him in one place so there would be no chance of him getting the locked picked or the handcuffs broken. It was this latter part which had Vash confused. How was he to make it so that Maddox would not escape on him?

It was something he was going to have to improvise upon, because it all came down to the place where he would find Maddox. And it just so happened to be in the evening, out on the streets.

"Oh no," Maddox said tonelessly, not moving from where he was standing. "You found me."

Vash stood his ground, eyeing the other carefully. That was too obvious. He was not walking into whatever trap Maddox had laid out for him. "Yes I did. Will you come willingly?"

Maddox did not respond immediately, as if he were pretending to take a long time to think about it. Which was an answer in himself. "It depends on where we are going and what we are doing. Can we go to the trees? I like trees."

"We can get close to something as tall as a tree," Vash replied blankly, hating the fact it was so easy to fall into this type of banter.

"But we already are," Maddox said, gesturing at an old and useless telephone pole. "A rather short tree, but one cannot be picky when it comes to their foliage."

People could too be picky, but Vash was not about to start that conversation. The conversation he could start was how he had had enough of this and he was giving up, but that would be wrong on two accounts. One, he would never give up. Two, if he had enough of this now he would be in the wrong profession. Or, at least, the wrong town.

Then there was the fact Vash was not going to stoop into lying just to get Maddox. He would beat the man on his own terms.

"Are you not going to arrest me?"

"I am thinking," Vash retorted.

Maddox began to clap, slowly. Vash was beginning to hate him.

Then he really did think of something.

"I will give you one opportunity," he said, fully intending on giving him a so-called "opportunity" while making it feel like he was not. "To be honest, I have not been impressed with your latest stunts."

"You are as impressionable as a cast iron skillet," Maddox replied, but if Vash knew the other man as well as he thought he did, Maddox was offended. Maddox liked being the source of awe and irritation (at the same time, in separate occasions, just whatever). "An officer of the law that cannot appreciate the other side is a rather shallow character."

"Or capable," Vash replied vaguely. "Do you want to know what your opportunity is?"

"Is that what Yao said?"

Vash ignored that. "Escape right now. In front of me. I want to watch you do it, Maddox. I do not trust the words of others. For all I know, everything else you have done has been blown out of proportion."

"Dad tends to exaggerate," Maddox agreed, "but Tino?"

"I do not think you can get away from me in any way other than _boring_."

Maddox paused. He had taken the challenge.

He turned and ran, with Vash hot on his heels. Oh, he knew that Maddox would have something planned. Maddox was not about to leave him thinking he could not accomplish anything. Vash was certain he could at least understand that much of this strange, strange man.

It did not take long for Vash to realize what Maddox was going to do. At least, what he was going to show. He was heading for the space between Ramon and Angus' houses. Between both of the houses and the fence in the back. It was a dead end and Maddox was running past a lamppost and into an area Vash knew he could not escape.

Then he was not running. No, he had stopped at the lamppost. And was climbing. Climbing the smooth, round, metal lamppost. Somehow.

_No you do not!_

Vash caught him by the ankle and there was a slight tussle where it seemed Maddox thought it would be funny if Vash came away with his shoe. Vash did not think that would be funny and he was not going to keep his grip on his shoe. He would keep a grip on his ankle and _pull_.

Maddox slid down and that was the opportunity Vash had been waiting for. One handedly he tried to cuff Maddox. Maddox finally realized what he was doing and did some very acrobatic things, which came to no avail with as intent on his purpose as Vash was.

Maddox's hands were cuffed around the lamppost behind him. Maddox did not look amused, or anything. He basically looked the same as ever – as if he had planned it this way.

"This is rather uncomfortable," he said, but Vash ignored him. He simply turned his back to Maddox and pulled out his phone.

"Heidi? Oh, everything is fine. Could you let Roy and Brian out now, I think they will have learnt their lesson. I need their assistance. Tell them to come to Angus' house. Thank you." He paused for a moment, his sister's loving voice saying something more. "I... I love you too. I will be home soon."

"Aw."

"Shut up," Vash said after hanging up, turning around to glare at Maddox. Which was when he realized Maddox was not where he had left him. Maddox was still making his way up the pole, even with his arms trapped behind him. It was like the only thing Vash had done was impede his movement.

Vash reached up and grabbed him, yanking him back down.

Maddox refused to come and instead wrapped his legs around Vash's neck, making it a little difficult to reach up and yank him down by the waist. It made it difficult to do anything, as this was a rather awkward situation to be in.

For a moment, Vash thought Maddox had stopped breathing. "I will let go if you uncuff me."

Vash really wanted to be let go, but he would not give in. "No."

"I will let you go and not make fun of you if you uncuff me."

"No."

"I will stay here and make fun of you if you uncuff me."

"Are you done?"

"Wait. I have some more proposals to make."

"I have an idea," Vash said stiffly. "You let go of me and we wait here until my backup comes and takes you in."

Maddox cocked his head slightly. "I think I have an aversion to that plan. A medical aversion."

"Are you telling me you are allergic to the law?"

"I have a doctor's note."

"If you are expecting to beat me in a matter of patience, Maddox Kirkland, I can assure you for your arrest I can wait until eleven."

Vash almost thought he saw Maddox frown slightly, but it was hard to tell considering the fact he had Maddox's legs around his neck and moving his head in any direction just seemed _wrong_. Roy and Brian had better not make any jokes about this, because Vash's latest reminder about their pay checks was still an item in question if they did anything stupid during work hours (of which this would be considering during).

"Angus? Is that you? Is there something–"

Vash could not see Ramon, but he did not have to to know that the man had spotted the both of them.

"Hello," said Maddox, looking at the man at Vash's back.

"Never mind," Ramon said. It did not take long for Vash to hear a front door open and close.

Vash later on supposed he should have been grateful for that. It was likely only because of that Maddox let go, and slid down the lamppost, where they both waited for Brian and Roy to show up and help get Maddox to a cell.

Vash had won!

At least, he had until the morning, when the cell he had left Maddox in was empty except for a haiku and iMarcus was rather tight lipped about where the man had gone.

_I took the cuffs with_

_Not because I wanted to_

_They hurt my wrists still_

Well, at least he was still cuffed.

* * *

_Notes:_

_You see, iMarcus was probably the only one who knew Vash and Maddox were not together. For reasons like this._

_And am I the only one who suddenly began thinking of Wiley Coyote and the Roadrunner with that third sentence? Probably._

_And it is amazing. I have established another part of where people live. Aka, Ramon and Xiu live near Angus. What do you know. Both of the houses have fencing. Angus has some sturdy fencing because of his job with animals. The other house has fencing so Ramon can try and keep everyone away. Well, not everyone. Just Xiu's friends. And Alfred._


	15. With These Two, Of Course

_At the end of 'All's Fine That Ends Okay'._

* * *

**There Are Absolutely No Facial Expressions**

If there was one person Maddox would ever ask advice from, it was the man who worked at the store. No, not the Norwegian. Or the Swede (definitely not him). It was Tino.

Maddox liked Tino. He liked how Tino was the master of letting people underestimate him. No one would (or had) ever believed the amount of things Tino was capable of. Tino had taught him quite a bit when he had first come to Hearth and Maddox was grateful. If there was one person he would never prank, it would be Tino.

At least, not until he could figure out a way of actually getting away with it. One did not try and prank their teacher until they were certain they would be successful. And there was the fact that the more time it took for Maddox to decide to do so, the more complacent Tino would become, making it easier for him to accomplish it.

All of this was besides the point. The point right now did not have anything to do with a prank. In fact, it had been a while since Maddox had broached that subject with his once mentor. It still would not be broached, as that was not what Maddox needed to know about. There was a very important date coming up and, just like every year, this was integral for his social survival with a certain person.

Maybe it was a little more so now that they were dating.

Heidi's birthday was coming up and Maddox needed to get her a real present that Vash would be happy with.

That was the odd thing. He had to get a present Vash would be happy with. Which meant Heidi would have to be ecstatic about it. It was a more important date than Vash's birthday. Vash would be easy to shop for. Vash would be disappointed if anything from Maddox was not ridiculous. What Maddox could get Heidi could also be ridiculous. Heidi had a good sense of humour. But, at the same time, Maddox knew he needed to get something she would really like, if just to pacify the overly protective brother.

So he went to the store, all the while considering the idea of ditching this trail of thought and buying Heidi a swimsuit. Heidi would appreciate it. Vash would be seething. But it would be funny, depending on the pattern.

No, no. He needed something _different_. Maybe a stealth pun. Either the kind Vash would not notice or the one he would notice and Heidi would not, which would mean Vash could not be upset about it because his sister would not know...

Now _that_ would be funny.

Entering the store displayed a dilemma. Tino was not right there and the person who was did not like him and would probably not tell him where Tino was a the moment. Berwald was reading a book behind the counter and had not even looked up when Maddox came in. Maddox could have turned around and left, but he decided against that.

Just because Berwald did not like him did not make it mutual. Maddox did not have too much of an opinion about Berwald. He was not someone Maddox liked, he was not someone he disliked. But he was not fun to prank. Which made him boring. There were very few people like that in Hearth. He had no idea why Tino could have married someone who was so... _unfun_.

Despite all that, Maddox knew Berwald knew where Tino was. And if he did not, he supposed he could go ask iLudo. He would have gone to iMarcus, but iMarcus had trouble keeping quiet sometimes.

A lot of the time.

"I require visual conformation of your husband," Maddox said.

Berwald barely looked up from his book. "Not here."

"I have noticed," Maddox agreed. He waited for another response, which Berwald was not giving him. "I have a question of him. Have no fear, it has nothing to do with marriage."

He had learnt his lesson. Thought it did not seem like Berwald believed him. Still, the man looked up from his book. "C'n I help y'?"

"That was the intent," Maddox nodded.

"Are y' buyin' somethin'?"

"That was going to be part of the question," Maddox continued. "You are not very good with this customer service idea, are you? Not that you have to be. We Hearthians are stuck with limited options when it comes to where to shop at, unless we take a lot of trips."

Berwald did not say anything. Maddox decided that had been enough of that and so turned to leave. iLudovicus it was. Hopefully he would be willing to tell him where Tino was, because if he was not then Maddox would have to spend a lot more time waiting and he would rather not spend too much time on this. He had other projects to get to.

He liked Heidi a lot, but Maddox's time was a commodity he enjoyed spending sporadically.

"Dun know what y'r getting' Heidi?"

Maddox paused at the door before turning back around. "I know what I will get her. I am trying to decide what to get her brother to give to her. He is so picky about these things."

"Y' think too much."

Now that was something Maddox had never been accused of before. He had been accused of _not_ thinking enough. Especially by Fatimah, even though she was a one to talk. "And all this time I could have been making less effort."

Berwald made a grunting sound before looking back at his book, leaving Maddox to wonder what the man had in mind.

Then again, Berwald never appeared to let on like there was much going on in his mind either, so perhaps it was a matter of not comprehending that level of thought. "How much thought am I wasting? It is a limited resource; I need to know how much I have been neglecting the environment."

"It's a pres'nt."

"Yes. Yes it is," Maddox nodded. "I had almost forgotten, but now that you have reminded me I will not keep it. Sometimes I get confused, especially after my own birthday."

"Sh' likes cute things an' l'ttle things t' occupy h'r time."

This was the most Maddox had heard Berwald say in his life. It made him wonder if Berwald did not hate him any more or if it was a trap. But Berwald was not the trap type. He always came forward with things.

So Maddox walked back over and stood in front of the counter. "Of course she does. But everyone knows that. And I am Maddox."

"Yeah."

"You are Berwald."

Berwald looked up from his book again.

"I did not think the rest of this joke through."

The Swede snorted, setting the book down. "Y' dun't get 't?"

If he thought he was being obvious, Maddox was going to have to shatter that impression. "Am I supposed to?"

Reaching to something on the counter, Berwald moved a box which contained the pieces for a ship in a bottle and moved it in front of him. Maddox almost thought Berwald wanted him to buy it before he would give his advice, before he got what the man was trying to say.

"Make y'r own."

"I'll buy ten of these," Maddox stated. Berwald did not say anything, but rang them up just the same.

After all, this was going to be a great idea. From Berwald, not Tino. Maddox decided that maybe Tino had not made such a bad decision with his husband after all.

Although the lack of reactions was something Maddox did not think he could deal with.

* * *

By the time Heidi had finished making her pasture in a bottle, she looked at the message Maddox had painted on to the bottom of the pieces.

**Your real present is buried in the forest. Here is a map.**

"Oh dear," she said.

If this was the truth, it was certainly going to take a while for her to find.

* * *

_Notes:_

_Vash was very suspicious of that present. And for good reason too, not that he gets to know that._

_Another person who is not fun to prank is Young Sil. Maddox would not go to that house with a ten foot binder, a grenade launcher, or a tuna fish sandwich. That is saying a lot. Then there is Gupta, who is really just boring to Maddox. The only person he does not prank, of whom it would be okay to and he would get great reactions out of, is Xiu. No, he pranks her husband instead._


	16. Secret Insurance Man!

**He's Given Himself A Number – And Another Name**

The thing Vash hated most was when he was fooled. It did not happen that often. Sure, some things happened under his radar, but that was not his fault. Not usually. That was not what he hated most.

No. It was when it happened right in front of him.

This was usually Maddox's fault. Not always, but usually. Usually was the key word for most of this.

Today it so happened to be his fault. Maddox's fault, that is. Well... Vash's too. Vash was just not certain _how_.

"What is this," he demanded, holding out the papers.

Maddox pushed his thick rimmed glasses up the bridge of his nose. Where he had gotten the glasses was a mystery. Thankfully it was one Vash could care less about. He shoved the papers into Maddox's face.

_I hope you get a paper cut._

Maddox did not get a paper cut. He did, however, take the papers.

"You found my insurance scheme," Maddox admitted, handing the papers back and returning to gluing mah-jong tiles to a chess board.

"Your insurance scheme," Vash repeated, as he usually did when Maddox actually said something that he wanted clarified. Since it was not too often that what Vash wanted clarified actually made any sense in the first place.

"I have excellent insurance," Maddox said.

Vash looked back down at the papers. "Because you are legally two people."

"Because I am legally two people."

Ten minutes later Maddox was in jail, gluing mah-jong tiles to the chess board in there.

Vash considered taking it away from him, but decided it might actually bother Maddox if he took it away _after_ Maddox had actually finished working on it. And Vash was determined to win something out of this. After all... he had to figure out how this happened. At all.

"Officially two people."

He said it again, in a slightly different way, just in case doing so might fix the problem.

"You did not have a problem with it when you said it was okay."

Vash wondered exactly how Maddox thought he had cleared it with him. But here it was, a paper with his signature, which meant he had to have known about it. Unless Maddox had suddenly figured out how to forge someone's signature. Vash was certain that was a skill Maddox did not have yet. He hoped that was not a skill Maddox had yet.

Oh god, that was a terrible thought.

* * *

Alfred showed up at the kitchen table with a pop-tart.

"Maddox is in jail again."

"I don't know why you even mention it like it's a new development," Arthur scoffed, sipping at his tea. Arthur had given up on Maddox's record by this point. If he ever wanted to leave Hearth he might have trouble. Then again, Arthur did not know how many case files Vash actually reported. Sure he was not as relaxed as Brian or Roy... maybe he did not want anyone else to know how insane this place was even with him working here.

It seemed like something Vash might do. An illegal misdemeanour in Hearth was like a child putting their hand in a cookie jar. Though that suggested that Vash was the parent to a lot of unruly children.

Not a good thought.

"I'm just saying that because Vash is at the door," Alfred said.

"Eat something real for breakfast," Arthur ordered as he went to answer the door. "Morning Vash. I hope whatever Maddox has done is not _too_ terrible this morning."

"He has created a false identity and made me approve of it," Vash said in a matter-of-fact tone. "I'm not sure when I did this. When he did this. Whatever. I came here to take his computer."

Arthur felt a headache coming on. "Go ahead, take what you need."

"Considering he sells himself his own insurance, he must be completely covered for everything," Alfred commented from the table. "Considering how he likes climbing over everything, and setting things on fire ants, and–"

Arthur felt a little faint.

"–so how illegal is it?"

Maybe Arthur had passed out, because Vash was already back with the computer and Alfred was done with his pop-tarts. Not that it took much time to eat a pop-tart. Just the ability to stomach it.

"How illegal is it to create a new identity?" Vash repeated. "And then use it to swindle the government? A lot, frankly."

"A lot illegal..." Alfred frowned.

Arthur could already tell where this was going. He did not want to believe it, but he recognized the look on Alfred's face. He whimpered.

Vash looked between Arthur and Alfred, his eyes stopping on the latter. "You did not."

"Hey! You guys get off lucky, you have a doctor in town! I don't!"

"You practice medicine on yourself?" Arthur screeched.

"I diagnose myself sometimes! Then I go get a second opinion. Geeze, you make it sound like a bad thing."

"Where did you learn these ethics?" Arthur continued.

Alfred gave him a serious look. "You."

* * *

This was how Vash ended up not arresting Alfred for the same thing he arrested Maddox for. Alfred remained at home to keep Arthur from having a heart attack. Vash preferred that everything was just undone. He would make them pay for the rest of their lives if he had to, but it would be done.

Or undone.

"Give me that," Vash said as he took the finished chess board and put it in the freezer.

The corner of Maddox's mouth only twitched.

* * *

_Notes:_

_I like pop-tarts, but I still know they are terrible to eat._

_And the Hearth series now has a TV Tropes page! Thank you ZQ! I never think in tropes when it comes to my work, so it is interesting to see what others have come up with!  
_


	17. Pika No, I Won't Write It, No

_This also takes place before CoE. Thank DF for this chapter._

* * *

**I Choose You!**

"Hello?"

The phone rang.

Wait. That is backwards.

The phone rang.

The number was not a familiar one, but Alfred did not care. He thought it might be Kiku's, but he was not going to put money on it or anything. Considering everyone in this town and how fast some of them went through phones (or just numbers) he never bothered to screen his calls. Plus, he was the town doctor. That would be kind of stupid.

"Hello?"

"Pikachu!"

Alfred blinked. "What was that?"

"Pika pikachu!"

"Kiku?" Alfred asked, confused. Then he realized what a stupid idea that was. "Nice try, Maddox. Kiku can do that a lot better."

Then he hung up.

Elsewhere, Maddox hung up the phone. And he had spent so much time trying to perfect that.

"Did not work?" Vash asked wryly.

"I tried so hard," Maddox said, pretending to pretend to affect some sort of disappointment.

Vash actually reached over and patted his shoulder. Then he smacked him in the arm. "You deserve that for prank calling, you idiot!"

"And here I thought you cared."

"Oh, grow up."

"I failed at pretending to be iLudo," iMarcus sighed in disappointment.

"You grow up too."

* * *

_Notes:_

_This chapter would have done so much better as a short comic. Unfortunately, I do not draw (very well)._


End file.
